Over 50 and image and wardrobe issues
I am maintaining my 135 pound size 6 body after losing 50+ pounds to get here. I am shooting to lose another 5 pounds and then maintain between 130 and 135. I am doing this very slowly now while eating a maintenance level of calories and just adding additional exercise to lose no more than 1/4 pound per week.
My issue at this point is around clothes. I have had to get rid of my entire wardrobe and have been trying to slowly build a new one in a size 6. I am 55 years old and though I feel younger than before I need to dress age appropriate. I am on a limited budget so shopping requires sales and discount stores. I find that with most of the clothes that I have acquired thus far I feel ackward and inappropriate. I miss my old clothes and the level of comfort in social settings I had in them and the 50+ pounds that I was hiding behind.
I went looking for some plain bermuda shorts the other day that would come to my knees. My legs though they are toning up nicely have crete paper skin and still some excess skin that makes wearing anything above the knee look bad. I found some that were sort of acceptable at J. Crew but on sale they were $40 for a single pair. That is a bit much for something to wear while gardening in the yard. I think I must be looking in the wrong places. Any suggestions would be great.
Additionally I am struggling with thoughts about my personal identity. Without my old clothes and the weight to hide in I feel like I am naked and exposed when in public with this thin body. Of course I am wearing clothing and I don't think I look badly but it is still quite uncomfortable to be around people. It seems that when I was young the attention that my looks brought me was not the kind of attention I needed or wanted. I am afraid that is in part what triggered over-eating for me. I realize that just because people look at me a certain way does not mean I need to respond to that type of attention nor does it make me into something I am not.
I am looking to hear from other women and men who are struggling with finding a level of comfort with the new image they present in the world as thin people. I was comfortable in my matronly clothes and now even my own elderly mother thinks I should be dressing differently than I did before. I would buy matronly clothes again if I could find them for reasonable prices. I don't like to draw attention to myself, or appear to be trying to look younger than I am. I am a grandmother and proud of it. I like being thin and healthy but I don't want to give up the image I had as a mature wisened older woman. It seems that image that others saw has melted away with my fat.
Losing weight presented me with a similar problem. I had a new body-shape, I was 40 years old & I was completely out of touch with fashion. A lot of what the kids were wearing would have made me look totally stupid and I struggled to find a high-street 'look' that fitted.
In the end I decided to ignore the high street herds and go for 'elegance' and 'class'. Wearing clothes that were both age and body-shape-appropriate. Creating my own style to suit my personality rather than slavishly following fashion. I got hold of some magazines and found pictures of women my own age that I thought were getting it right. I bought an excellent little book called 'What Not To Wear' by Trinny Woodhall and Susannah Constantine. A combination of the two gave me more confidence that I could dress well and be myself. For the first time in my life I enjoy shopping for clothes!!! I don't have a big budget either so I choose clothes carefully these days and go for quality rather than quantity.
You're bound to draw attention if you look good and people will respond positively. All you can do is practice what to say and how to react. I find compliments are best met with a polite 'thank you'.
gi-jane! Thank you so much for the response! You hit the nail on the head! I have just not quite found my style yet in the clothes I have thus far purchased. I feel like I don't look bad or inappropriate really I just don't feel like me in them. I know there must be designs that will fit this new body that reflect my personality better. I am not a fashion trend type person. I had nice clothes when I was heavy but they weren't trendy. I dressed tastefully though I was fat.
I will go look through magazines and see if I can find things that look more like what I want and then shop instead of going shopping and trying to piece together something when I am not sure what it is suppose to look like. I am enjoying shopping for the first time as well but I feel like I am just not getting it right yet.
I think you are correct also about my mother. She wants to see me dress nicely and she sees that I am not getting it yet also. My fears around the attention will not feel so scary when I feel like I am dressed as myself and not like I am pretending in clothes that don't suit my personality. Thanks again...you helped me immensely with this!
Clothes can be so awkward especially after losing weight. I lost 175 pounds and had to struggle to find clothes that were appropriate for me. Granted I am 24 years old, but it was just SO strange. Going from my familiar plus sized clothes (very few clothes, very small selection - one style) to smaller clothes in a wide variety was overwhelming. The clothes I wanted to fit into when I was a teenager is what I was pulled towards once I could fit into the smaller sizes. My clothes that I started purchasing for me do not even begin to look like a 24 year olds wardrobe. A size 2 and I am living in jeans and hoodies with skater brands across my chest. How lame am i? LoL.
I am a bargain shopper myself. Since I love long sleeves (extra skin for me too) now is the time to hit the clearance rack. Don't just think about the NOW, you have to think about the cold that will come again, and get a few things for then. As the seasons switch, clearance will move around the corner and become cooler clothes.
I try to stay out of fancy malls too. The name brands you were pointing out are just that, name brands. Try looking through whats at Ross or TJ maxx, whatever you have in the area. Even sears has some great choices. And don't under estimate walmart or target. Nothing wrong with target shorts! :)
Thank you for such a thoughtful and honest post. I just wanted to suggest Ann Taylor Loft. Not sure if you have one around but it's worth the trip (as long as it's not in another town) They have adult womens clothing that is, as gijane said, elegant and classic. Don't be put off by the brand name cause they always have sales and the "loft" part means it's Ann Taylor's version of TJMAX. I have never been disspointed by the selection and usually come away with deals. And I never feel like I'm trying to look 18 at 44.
X17Star17X and bintzp ...Thank you both for the help! Ann Taylor Loft, TJMax and Ross are places that I have found things I like. TJMax is a bit further away so I can't go there regularly. I think I need to get clear in my head a more specific style that I am wanting for myself. I used to have trouble just finding clothes that fit. Now with so much that fits I have to learn to be more selective and actually define my own style. I just have to keep looking until I find the things that actually feel right to me! Your comments have been helpful as well as letting me know I am not alone in this. Losing weight and changing my life style has resulted in many more adventures than I could have anticipated. I feel now that there was so much more to life that I was missing out on and I am so grateful to be part of it all now!
Hi there, Terry - CONGRATULATIONS!!! on your very smart approach and success in losing the weight. For me, losing it is not nearly as challenging as keeping it off and you're doing everything right.
As far as dressing appropriately, I know what you mean by asking THAT question... I'm 62 and I can't wear most of the trendy fashions that are so popular now and I refuse to spend a days wages on a blouse or jacket. I shop at Ross and consignment shops, Goodwill (if you have hours to go through stuff), and the sales at Sears and Kohls. Walmart is pretty good for jeans and little tops - everyday wear. I buy the best quality and most classic styles I can afford for work and pretty much live in leggings or jeans and layered tops for leisure time.
I don't worry too much about the skin issues and other things that happen as a result of losing weight - getting the weight off is so fantastic I feel it's a small price to pay and, at my age, some wrinkles and sagging are normal anyway. I love little sweaters and shrugs, scarves and fun jewelry (distract the eye from the problem areas), 3/4 length sleeves, that kind of thing. Don't be too trendy, no bare midriff or clevage, spiff up your makeup, get a flattering haircut, do your nails, put some shine/gloss on your hair and lips and be happy - nobody will even notice the areas you think are so visible. And, for Heaven's sake, girl, go see a good fitter (like at Macy's) for new underwear!!! That's one place where you should spend some $$$ - make sure your undies fit right, makes everything else look better :o)
Oh Roz, you speak the truth about underwear. I never really thought about it until I went to buy some new underwear at Target. They have little size charts on the back of the package. I instinctively went for the size 9. But, after reading, it seems I need a size 6. Whoa, it makes a HUGE difference to have some undergarments that fit well.
The op, Terry, said she was 135 pounds and a size 6. I'm at 156 and right in the middle of a size 6 and 8 (depends on the manufacturer). I'm 5'6". How tall are you Terry? Seems like I shouldn't be able to wear the same size as someone 20 pounds lighter than me.
I've had to replace my entire wardrobe also, and another suggestion I have is to try thrift stores and consignment shops. Now, I admit to a love of shopping, and a high tolerance level for disappointment, but I have found some nicely styled dresses and slacks at very very inexpensive prices - try $5 for a silk dress.
And I'm 53 and I hear you on finding appropriate, classic styles!
tciherr, I am 5'6" also and I wear a size 4 or a 6 now depending on the maker.
I have found appropriate clothes over the last year that I enjoy wearing and feel comfortable in.
The other thing that has been really wonderful in the last 15 months of maintenance is that much of my loose skin is now gone! Having surgery to correct it was never an option for me. I had resigned myself to having this ugly loose skin on my belly, arms and legs forever and never really feeling like I could be naked in front of my husband without feeling self conscious. Everything, except one article, said surgery was the only option to get rid of the sagging loose skin. Well I am here to tell you that continued exercise and healthy eating, even at age 56 pays off. Now 75% of the sagging skin is gone. My body has absorbed it and tightened up my skin again. I do still have some loose skin but not as much as my mother does. She has never had a weight problem and only weighs 110 now at 74 years of age. So I think what loose skin I do have now is strictly from being older and thus a normal amount for my age. I no longer have 6 inches of wings hanging from my arms, no more skin hanging down from my belly that I needed to tuck into my pants like the tails on a shirt and no more gross looking legs with skin seemingly belonging to an elephant. I have a female body again with skin that looks a bit wrinkled and older than it did at 20 or even 25, but I don't look like an under-weight elephant anymore.
I hope this is encouraging to some of you! It is making me happy...my husband never complained or even mentioned it, he loves me...but I am sure some of you know that it still can feel uncomfortable to be naked even after reaching your goal weight! If you are suffering with loose skin, take heart! There is hope! Just stick with it and give your body time to recover!
It's really fun to read about all your weight loss, eveyone. I am amazed as to how much weight you have lost and how hard you have worked to lose it. I also have been reluctant to buy ANY new clothes, but I see that a lot of you have decided to do it.
I have been wondering if I should spend the money to buy me a few new articles of clothing such as cargo shorts. I have lost around 45 to 48 pounds since March 1st. I am 6' and weight 170 now. I have been doing a lot of walking, weight lifting, exercise bike, boxing bag, and crunchers and am on a 2300 a day diet. However, I don't plan on exercing 3 hours a , 7 days a week for the rest of my life. That is why I am so obsessed with finding a good maintenance program that works for me.
Last year when I visited two of my children out East, they took me to a couple of places and I bought some cargo short with a waist of 36. Now, when I wear those shorts with a belt they look so huge and wrinklie on me. All of my jeans, which are pretty old, look way too big, also, except for a pair of black jeans, I bought in the 80's that fit too tightly, so I seldom wore them. I wasn't sure I should start buying new jeans and cargo shorts, because I am not convinced I can keep the weight off. I finally did go to Wally World and buy 3 pairs of cheap jeans and 3 pair of cargo shorts with a 33 waist (I almost got 32, but decided I had better play it safe).
When I give blood now or am asked my weight for some reason it seems odd not to say 215 or 210.
At least there's one other guy in here wondering about this stuff! :)
I'm 42, 6' tall, and just reached my target weight of 175 (like today), dropping just over 30 pounds. I've still got a ways to go to level off my weight loss, but then I'm expecting I'll need to go shopping. I've bought some inexpensive clothes (Hello, Costco!) while losing weight to tide me over, but even now, I feel like I'm wearing my dad's clothes. Even my golf shirts and t-shirts just seem to hang on me in folds.
I've been tempted to just walk into a decent shop, and ask them to pick me out a few outfits. I've never been one to worry about what I'm wearing too much (see the golf shirts and t-shirt comment before), but maybe it's time for a bit of a makeover. At the same time, I'm not in a huge hurry, since I don't know where my weight will settle. I'm still plan to adjust my body composition (i.e. gain muscle, maybe lose a little more fat). And budget constraints kind of limit what I do as well.
Clint
Clint:
Nice to hear about you! Congrats on your weight loss! I will be reading with interest any thing you and others can say to help me maintain. Thanks for sharing your information. It's nice to find out about you. Best of luck in all endeavors! I am 62.
I am looking for a PERMANENT weight-window of 165-170. Some younger gals and I (on another thread) are having a friendly discussion on when is the most "honest" time of the day to weigh. I would suggest that most people should take their first weigh-in of the morning, but because I know that 100% of the time for me that is ALWAYS the least I weigh, I do not use it as my "true" weight. What I have been doing is weighing 3 or more times a day and taking the average. I have decided, once I can stay within my weight-window, to weigh first thing in the morning and weigh just before I go to bed. I will always use the heavier of the two to see if I am staying within my "window." I definitely am not arguing that eveyone should do this, or even that anyone (except me) should do this.
Anyway, I am wondering if I can figure out how to maintain. I will be reading with interest what all of you suggest is the best way. I am also happy that I can find out what another man is doing that would be similar to what I want to maintain. My goal is to cut down from my 3+ hours of exercise a day and increase my 2300 on average calorie diet. I want to cut back to 90 minutes of quality exercise (keeping my heart rate around 130-140) and consuming 2300-2500 calories daily. I just won't know if this works until I chart it for a couple of weeks.
Thanks for the comments! I've read your discussion in the other thread. Personally, I weigh myself in the morning. Before I eat or drink anything, and after getting rid of some accumulated fluid. To be honest, I wasn't all that wrapped up in hitting a particular number as far as my weight loss went. Up until last week, I didn't even have a final goal in mind. I just knew I had extra fat to get rid of. How much, I didn't know. I think if I had to pick a measurement to tell me if I'm at an ok weight, it would likely either be my waist size, or my body fat percentage, and I'd throw away the scale. In fact, just yesterday I ordered a body fat analyzer to try. But if weighing yourself a few times a day works for you, that's great!
As far as maintaining goes, today's the first day of attempting to "maintain". I expect to fail horribly at this for the first while. After a total re-vamping of my eating habits and diet, I have no idea how I managed to eat as much as I must have been eating to put on all that weight! So getting back up to the 2500+ calories that it looks like I'll need is a struggle.
I still don't even know how many calories I'll need to maintain. When I started losing weight, I was really bad, and dropped from whatever I had initially down to about 1200 per day. Way too few, plus I was swimming 3 times per week for 45 minutes. I did that for a few weeks (losing lots of weight), and then bumped up my food to my current average of about 1650 calories per day, but now I'm doing about an hour a day of exercise. For the past 3 weeks, on the 1650 calories, I've averaged about 3 pounds per week of lose, which translates to about 1500 calories per day that I need to make up. That's almost doubling what I've been eating!
I jokingly commented to my friend/nutrition consultant that I've recently allowed myself a square of chocolate per day (10g), which has 50 calories. So 1500/50 = 30 squares of chocolate = 10 ounces. Yay for me! :) Or that works out to about 10 beer per day, I think... For some reason, she hasn't commented on these observations yet... But the thought of cranking up my calories with "bad" choices doesn't seem very productive. So my struggle is how to get up to 2500 calories at an appropriate ratio of carbs/protein/fat, and keep things like sodium under control.
I can't imagine exercising 3 hours per day consistently. I do about an hour per day regularly; either cycling, running, or swimming. Plus weight training 2 or 3 times a week too. I plan on maintaining that level of exercise indefinately, and I'm currently training for a sprint triathlon. To be honest, at this point I'd almost like to put on a couple pounds per month of muscle, which means an extra 250 calories per day to fuel that.
My plan right now is to take my regular eating, and first of all make sure I eat all my in-between meals, which I'm not good at doing. Make sure they're not just a piece of fruit, if possible, but have a cup of low-fat cottage cheese, a glass of skim milk, or just something extra. I think I'll also try just bumping up my portion sizes by another 25% to begin with as well, just to help. And I'll probably relax my rules on eating dessert after supper. It just seems strange to start breaking all the "rules" I set out for myself when I started looking at what I'm eating. But I suspect that even with this, I'll be lucky to tack on an extra 500 calories per day. After that, who knows... I could be down another 5 or 10 pounds before I figure this all out. It seems weird to have that as an issue.
I was thinking about this the other day... I think I put on my extra 40 pounds (I lost 10 in the 6 months before my current attempt) over the space of 10 to 15 years. That works out to say, 4 pounds per year, which is only an extra 14000 calories over the entire year. So my diet before wasn't all that bad, and with the extra exercise I've been doing compared to before, I could likely just go back to eating exactly as I did before, and I'd STILL lose weight. But I know my old diet wasn't all that healthy, so that's not an option. Too much fatty food, too much beer and sugars...
Anyway, that's a lot of rambling on... Where did you get your figure of 2300 to 2500 calories per day to maintain? Even at a "sedentary" setting, the handy dandy calculators tell me I should be eating 2100 calories per day. If I add on for exercise, that gets boosted by quite a bit. Like on Saturday, I did a 40 minute bike ride, with a 20 minute jog afterword. That took off another 700 calories. And that's only an hour!
So keep up the posting on your progress! I'm also hoping to learn from you!
Clint
Clint:
Wow, can I really identify with what you wrote. It seems very parallel to what I have been doing. I got my calorie figures by going to several Net sites and making a spread sheet out of all the calculators (including Calorie Count) I could. Then I tried to guestimate a good plan of attack to lose weight, factoring in the facets of 1) exercise to burn calories and 2) lower calorie intake. I chart everything I do in terms of foods/calories I consume each day, my weight, and my daily exercise. Being obsessive-compulsive and using my diet/exercise as a fun, challenging hobby, I lost weight too fast, but I am really eating quite healthy:
Typical of the foods I eat are: small red beans, egg whites, ground flax seed, apples, raw cabbage, red potatoes, lean beef-bison, whole wheat pizza dough, nonfat cool whip, nonsugar gelatin with fresh fruit, diet soda, 100% fruit juice, diced tomatoes, 7-grain bread, strong coffe, walnuts, almonds, small amounts of dark chocolate, etc., etc.
Until I got a very nasty blister because I went walking 4 consecutive days alternating new pair of shoes for almost 2 hours a day and just kept letting the blister bleed into my shoe, I was doing these exercises: 1) 90 to 120 minutes a day walking at 3.5 mph 2) 1 hour of exercise bike at light speed 3) 15 minutes of weight lifting 4) 15 minutes of heavy bag 5) 6-10 minutes of crunchers--7 days a week.
Currently I am doing the following daily: 30 minutes of bike (keeping my heart rate above 140 on average), 20 minutes of weight lifting, 15 minutes of heavy bag, 6-10 minutes of crunchers, and then an hour of exercise bike at light effort.
My eventual goals are the following, however:
Alternate these workouts 6 times a week, giving myself one day a week off.
1) 60 minutes of walking (keeping my heart rate above 130); 20 minutes of triceps/handgrips; and 10 minutes of crunchers = total of 90 minutes.
2) 25 minutes of exercise bike (late morning--keeping my heart rate above 140); 20 minutes of biceps; 20 minutes of heavy bag; 25 minutes of exercise bike (middle evening) = total of 90 minutes.
3) Consume 2300-2500 daily healthy calories AND NOT LOSE OR GAIN WEIGHT.
Sorry about the long post, but you have really helped motivate me. I'll keep the future posts short and will read with interest how you are doing with your approach to maintenance.
I too think I went at this a little too obsessively, but it's probably because I was seeing success at it. I'm not usually that kind of person, at least, not for extended periods of time. I usually get bored or distracted by shiny objects or something.
Part of my dietary issues is the fact that I eat most of my food away from home. I get up at 5 am or so, and head to the gym to workout. I usually have either a protein shake and a banana and, if I'm lifting weights, a couple cups of milk right after working out. If I'm swimming, I'll have the milk before leavign the house; it stops a heartburn issue that's otherwise under control. The thought of eating before going to the gym just doesn't sit well with me in general. So my breakfasts during the week seem very limited. On the weekend, I'll do up scrambled eggs with salsa, peppers, onions, etc.
From the time I leave the house at 5:15 to the time I get back to the house 12 hours later, I try to bring enough food for that period. And the only cooking facilities are a microwave and hot water. As part of my dietary changes, I cut out all drinks except for water and skim milk. In the past month I've allowed a couple beer per week, if I'm good, but I'll usually do an extra long workout as penance. But really, can you BBQ without a beer in your hand? I can't! Apparently, I've also cut out almost all bread from my diet... I rarely seem to eat it anymore. I get enough carbs from pasta, rice, and even veggies that I haven't really had a hankering for it. I eat a lot of chicken, tuna, or steak salads (whatever meat was leftover the night before). I should likely eat more beans; I like them, and they're good for you. Last night, I made a Sante Fe Rice dish which I really like, and it's just beans, rice, tomato sauce, salsa, etc... Good stuff. For a normal sized bowl, it works out to about 350 calories, I think. I guess I could just double up on things like that.
The other thing I've found is that I'm pretty sensitive to my sodium intake. Too much salt, and I can put on 5 pounds overnight (literally). It comes off over the next couple of days if I'm good after that, but still... So I'm trying to limit my sodium intake to 1500mg or less per day. I was concerned on my weigh-in today that I'd blown my sodium intake yesterday, and that would cause me to miss my target, but apparently I chugged enough water to flush it out.
So do you find you're still losing weight, or are you bouncing around? How long have you been maintaining (vs. trying to lose), and how successful would you say you are? I guess we could move this to another new thread, since we're kind of derailing this one. :) But in getting back to that, what have you been doing for clothes? I've still got all my old shirts, even though they hang on my like old drapes. Gonna start replacing them slowly, I think. My pants, though... I've gone from a 38" waist to a 32" waist. I've got multiple pairs of almost new pants because of it. I've got 3 belts of different sizes, and my current one needs another hole in it since it does absolutely no good the way it is. I really do feel like I'm 12 again, and wearing my dad's clothes. If I had the money, this would be a really good time for a total wardrobe makeover. I'm not a clothes person at all, but at the same time, I've worked relatively hard for this new body (flat stomach and all), and I wouldn't mind showing it off a bit. But my wife thinks my mid-life crisis is troubling enough without that, so I'll do it gradually.
Clint
That would really be difficult for me to have to take my meals and food to prepare with me. I cook at home and usually do the dishes 2 or 3 times a day because I dirty so many things in my meal preparation. I think you have a more difficult time with your exercise and following your diet because it is so much easier for me to stay home if I choose. You are really showing a lot of dedication.
I used to drink really strong Imperial Stouts and Porters (high calories and high alchohol); I fell in "love" with them, but my goodness I was taking in a lot of calories. I have only had beer one time in 3 and 1/2 months now--a six-pack of low calorie, light, rot-gut beer. I have had cheap, but good red wine from Wally World twice in that time period. No, it is really difficult to BQ without a beer in the hand; although, I can drink strong coffee and sort of get the same enjoyment.
I wear mainly around the house old gym trunks and old T-shirts. Otherwise, I wear jeans and a little nicer t-shirt when I go walking or walk to down town.
I really watch the sodium so that is not a problem for me. My stomach is not as flat as I had hoped, but some of the size is loose skin. My arms are skinny but muscular, as are my skinny, legs. I don't mind being slim, as long as I have some tone to the muscles.
I can't tell if I am bouncing around or not--because my water weight really varies. I hope to someday get this all figured out. I figure I need to lose about 4-5 more pounds and then THT IS IT! Maintain maintain maintain!
(LOL Ok, so I didn't keep this short!)
If it makes you feel better, your posts are at least shorter than mine :)
Eating away from home isn't too bad, it just limits options. Another limitation is that my wife does most of the cooking at home due to our schedules, and although she's supportive of my efforts, we're not always in sync with everything. For example, I'd be super happy to always have leftover protein (chicken, steak, whatever) from the previous night for the next few days lunches. Doesn't always happen, though. I've been tempted to buy a big bag of chicken breasts and cook them up for myself, and then put them into individual 5 oz servings. Never got quite that industrious though.
My wife and I made a deal back in March that we would both give up alcohol for 6 weeks until we went on a trip to California (we live in Alberta, Canada, so this was a big deal to us). I succeeded in that, and on our trip, since we were vacationing with my cousin and his family, I relented to allow (I think) 3 or 4 drinks over the week. Still lost 2.5 pounds on the trip, which was great! Since then, I've probably had 3 or 4 more, and I'll probably relax that a little more now too. I've had a problem with heartburn in the past, and because of that, I severely cut down on my alcohol (anything more than 3 beer is nasty, even with prescription medication) and caffine. Gave up all carbonated beverages including my beloved coke and morning coffee as part of my dietary changes. Strictly skim milk, water, and the occasional beer. No juices, pop, ice tea, etc. Didn't need the "empty" calories back then, and I don't really miss them anymore, although I do wonder what a coke or coffee would be like now after 3 or 4 months. The first beer sure went down good!
It would be nice to be able to live in shorts and a t-shirt! :) I have to look mostly professional, so it business casual during the week. And dress pants look funny if you have to cinch up your belt to keep them from falling down, plus you look like you have an elephant bum on the back. Not an attractive look at all, even if your body looks better because you're more slender. :)
I'm pretty happy with the physical changes. For all the exercise I've been doing, I'd be happy to have filled out the muscle areas more, but I think because of the weight loss, that hasn't happened. But I sure have a lot more definition; it's kind of weird to be able to see and feel muscles moving again. And ribs! I still have them, even though they disappeared for a few decades! :) I do 45 minutes of swimming 3 times a week (2km, or 1.2 miles), which has really helped with the shoulders and upper arms. I've always had decent legs, but the cycling (usually 4 sessions of 45 minutes and 20km in distance) and now running (20 minutes, 3x per week) has help define those more. Now I've thrown weightlifting on top of that (1 hour per day, 2 or 3 days per week), so I'm hoping to see even more good growth. I don't want to be the next Arnie or anything, but it's good to feel comfortable taking off my shirt at the pool, you know? They say you can put on at most 2 pounds of lean muscle per month, so that's my target, rather than maintaining my current weight. I'm fully expecting to lose another 5 pounds before I get the maintenance thing under control first, though, and I'm not going to worry about gaining until that happens. I ordered a body fat analyzer to try to make sure I'm not putting on fat rather than muscle, but I'll use my waist size to keep a check on that too.
Clint
From what I have read, swimming is absolutely one of the greatest exercises a person can do, because it burns calories but is easy on the joints. I don't have that opportunity.
I used to do a lot of the cooking for my wife and me--grilled steaks and burgers, stir fries, broiled chicken, deep fat fried foods (shrimp, french fires, onion rings etc), chili, etc. She has had to change her eating habits, because I made it clear I have changed the kinds of foods I eat. She doesn't cook much any more because she detests cooking for herself if I am not going to eat what she cooks. She is a great cook (Czech), but unfortunately her meals used to run toward the high-calorie side, as did mine. Now she eats a lot of prepared low-calorie meals and Subways and things from Runza. She still eats some high-calorie things, but that is her decision; she seems healthy, if a bit overweight, and takes blood-pressure and cholesterol meds; I have opted to change my diet and exercise regimen because I DO NOT want to take meds. I do take a low-strength aspirin and a multivitamin tablet.
Wow! It would really be difficult for me to give up juice, my pot of strong coffee (even though I know I overdo it), and diet soda. I admire you for being able to do that.
terry2fish: While not at maintenence, I've lost a significant amount of weight before, and I've also had problems with buying new clothes. Finally, I realized that it took my years to get my old (fat) wardrobe where I wanted it. Many things I love are only in style and available every few years (bermuda shorts, pea coats, casual blazers, etc). In some ways, I have to accept that I can't just go out and replace it in one summer. So at first, my wardrobe was a little redundant (I have learned that when I find something I like, to buy it in several different colors :), but it will grow into a comfortable personal style as you continue adding to it.
Try on things you wouldn't buy before! You may be surprised at what looks good on you now.
and don't forget: you ARE a mature wisened older woman, and everyone will remember that, or figure it out if they've just met you, no matter what you are wearing or weighing.
terry2fish: Thanks for this interesting post about clothes. I'm not quite at my goal yet, but have lost 75 pounds so far. I have a huge amount of clothes in my possession, but very little to wear. I kept all my old clothes from the last time that I was normal weight, which was the mid-'90s. I can wear a few of those things now, but most of them make me look like I stepped straight out of a Seinfeld episode!
Right now I only buy jeans (the tapered ones from the '90s are just too ridiculous-looking to wear) and a few tops, because I am still about 20 pounds away from my goal weight. But on those occasions when I do go shopping, I am really overwhelmed by the choice, and I don't have any idea of what my style should be. Shopping in the large-size section was relatively simple: find something decent looking that flowed easily over my body!
I'm also concerned about looking age-appropriate, without looking matronly. Quite a challenge overall.
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