overcoming bulimia- need an accountability partner!

i have been bulimic for a little over two years now, and i am ready to stop! i have been working w/ my counselor and doctor on this, and i want so badly to quit! It is such an intense addiction.. once your in routine in seems nearly impossible to quit! I just started Prozac for depression/bulimia, so hopefully that will help. I'm looking for an accountability partner (preferably someone also recovering from bulimia) so we can encourage one another, and help keep eachother on track. Similar stats would be cool, but unnecessary.

female/ 17 y/o/ 5'7"/ cw: 160/ gw:145

if you don't WANT to stop it will be difficult to succeed in stopping this activity that will have detrimental effects on your body. your stomach acid will erode the enamel on your teeth, your electrolytes are most likely unbalanced...the list goes on and on but most of all a larger proportion of bulimics tend to gain weight instead of lose it because they fall into a binge / purge cycle consuming massive quantities of food.Don't be embarrased to seek help from your doctor, a teacher and even your parents this is a disease that has potential to take hold. I recommend taking a weigt trainning or defense course to empower yourself since you don't need to lose weight at 5'6 and 125lbs.

I consider myself to be a recovering/almost recovered bulimic. I haven't done it in a LONG time, but I have relapsed in the past...So I can't say I am not still recovering. I am however successful in doing so right now, for the past 5 months.

What I have to say to you is this: You sound like you're really in the thick of it right now, and I totally feel your pain!! I know how badly you're suffering... Trust me, I've been there. But let's face it: bulimics, we're illogical & lie to ourselves when we're trapped in that cycle of starving/binging/purging....Somebody who's in the same boat has their own hell to deal with, and can't possibly give you the help or the insight into recovery that you need.

What I think you need as far as somebody to help you through is somebody who is successfully recovering.... Like me, for example!! Hahaha... Well it's true. I only empathize to the fullest, and when I hear about somebody suffering like this, I really, truly want them to be helped!!!!!!!!! So this is my honest opinion.

I think you're also doing very well by talking to a counsellor. It is an INTENSELY strong addiction, and requires a sort of "detox", similar to alcoholism. It's a process...And trust me, YOU CAN GET THROUGH THIS. You've come to the point where you can say to yourself that THIS IS NOT A WAY TO LIVE - It's a way to die. And that, in itself, is a step towards recovering.

I'm here for you if you need encouragement or support :) Take care...

~J C-M

hey i'd like to join! my bulimia began 3 1/2 yrs. ago, when i moved out of the house at 18 i continued the binging without the purging & gained 15lbs. then last winter i came here to become healthy again, but as stressful situations came up over the summer i fell back into ole habits and spiraled down, big time, again. I am so ready to be free from the constant abusive, controlling thoughts that come with having an ED. Also, my boyfriend, also my best friend, recently found me out. It was devastating--i feel so shameful & guilty yet still, almost angry that it is not my secret anymore. so, i am here to help & be helped--jenn

19 y/o 135lbs. 5'6

Just diagnosed last week with Anorexia Bulimia...it's so different when you hear it from the doctor...

Ashley, 5'7", 125 lbs, want to maintain.....or stay between 125 and 130

Ashley- I give you lots of credit for taking care of yourself and going to the doctor.  :o)  It's a huge step (one that I am not able to take yet) and I hope that it has started to help you head in the right direction!

HI, ASHLEY.

 I COMMEND YOU FOR TAKING CHARGE AND REALLY TRYING TO OVERCOME THIS ADDICTION.  I WAITED WAY TOO LONG.  MY BULIMIA STARTED AROUND 15.  IT ESCALATED THROUGH COLLEGE.  IT TOOK OVER MY WHOLE LIFE AND STRIPPED ME OF HAPPINESS.  I FINALLY WENT TO TREATMENT AT THE AGE OF 24.  I HAVE BEEN DOING BETTER.  I RECENTLY STARTED SEEING A THERAPIST FOR IT AGAIN.  WE ARE MAKING GREAT PROGRESS. 

 I WISH YOU THE SAME.  IF YOU EVER WANT TO EMAIL, PLEASE DO!

I WILL HELP BE ACCOUNTABLE!  ACCOUNTABILITY IS VERY IMPORTANT IN RECOVERY!

 LINDSEY=)

I have ben bulimic for almost 6 years.  I have just recently started going to therapy to stop this addiction.  I have also let my boyfriend of 6 years and all of my friends and family know.  That was the hardest part for me.  It is so shameful and so hard for people without this problem to understand.  I used to binge and purge 3-4 times a day.  Sometimes more if I had the time and was bored.  I found it comforting but painful at the same time.  I am now eating a healthy breakfast and lunch, but fighting in the evenings to not binge and purge.  It is so habitual, and I don't know how to stop.  Since I have been eating healthy and only binging once a day I have actually gained 5 pounds and I am freaking out about it.  I am not thin to begin with and even with my ED it has been a struggle just to stay an average weight.  So I am stepping up the exercise and yoga, I really hope that helps.  I know it will take a while to get my body to balance out, but I would love to just feel normal again.  Someone who can eat an ice cream sundae and not feel like the world is going to end if I don't go to the bathroom and get rid of it.

My heart and prayers go out to all that suffer from this.  I am here for anyone who wants to talk about what they are going through.  Its really tough, and no one understands like we do.  :o)

Hi Mandelion - evenings are hard for me too, especially since my partner goes to the gym and I have at least one and a half hours on my own. As you may have seen from one of my other posts - seeing a nutritionist is really helping me cos I don't have to think about what I'm going to eat, so if possible I'd definitely recommend it!!! The other thing I try and do in the evenings is to keep myself busy or go and visit friends, too much time on my hands is definitely a recipe for disaster when it comes to bingeing and purging!!!

Definitley!  My boyfriend works nights so I have the whole evening to myself.  I love the nutritionist idea.  I will ask my therapist if she has anyone to recommend.  I have also become a distributor for Herbalife and their nutrition and wellness plan have been amazing for me!  Its just the down time that really gets me! 

Thank you so much for your advice!  I really appreciate it!

Katemono,

I think you are taking a great first step amd putting it out there that you want to get help.  First of all, I think it would be great if you found a counselor to talk to.  I don't know what area you are in, but go online and google eating disorder counselors in your area.  That is how I found mine and she is amazing.  She used to be bulimic to, so it really helps having her know exactly what I am going through.  Reach out to your friends and don't be afraid to talk to your parents.   Parents never want to see their children sick or hurting and they will be proud of you for taking action before it puts you in the hospital again.  Also, I think that you may want to take a look at your goal weight.  If you are 5'10, 125lbs is WAY too thin.  150 is actually a perfect weight for your height.  I am 150 and only 5'7, and I am still considered a healthy weight.  If you are anything like me, that number on the scale is haunting and I see all of these thin beautiful hollywood women and I wonder why I can't be like them!  Well, working on my self image and being comfortable in my own skin is the most important thing for me.  Without that, I don't think I will ever have a healthy relationship with food.

Hang in there Kate!  Go get the help you need and deserve!  I will be praying for you!

so happy to find some other people out there with the same problem! i vote this shouldnt be a forum, but a group...i'm joining the band wagon. i need help. i hope someone contacts me back, too...i'm a recovering anorexic and am falling down the bullimic hole. anyone out there or have any advice!!?!?

I am also in this bulimic hell.

I've been doing this for a little over a year now and it has consumed my life.  I have been diagnosed and see a therapist.  I was on meds, stopped, but intend to go back on them.  Bulimia has also caused me to gain 25 pounds over the past year, but I still can't stop.

I'd love to have people who can relate.

i am also struggling with this nasty cycle...would love to have some people who talk to. i know in my heart that its NOT right for me and is preventing me from true freedom....but im just so impulsive.

feel free to contact me

i'm in recovery and like to think i'm about 80-90% better.. but i still have some anorexia/bulimia relapses and need some support to stop them forever, so i'm joining this group! my biggest problem is binging whenever i'm taken out of my day-to-day routine.. for whatever reason. that usually leads to about a week of more binging, laxative abuse and restriction. luckily i've been doing a lot better in learning how to just adjust to being out of my routine without panicking. i guess it all goes back to those ocd tendencies ed sufferers have.. it's not even about the calories anymore because i'm just maintaining my weight.. it's just that i feel like i need to eat my healthy foods all the time and exercise regularly to feel clean.. like i'm doing it right. i guess that's an eating disorder all on its own.. now my obsession is not losing weight like it was before, it's eating really healthy, exercising and maintaining my weight. this is ridiculous.. but anyways, i'm taking it step by step and one day i'll be able to say i'm very close to 100% recovered :)

 

feel free to aim/message me whenever too.

Hi!

I just recently posted a similar request..although my topic got locked for some reason. Anyhow, I would totally be open to anyone who wants to talk, as I am in need of someone to talk to also!!

I am ready to actually admit I have a problem, and want to beat this thing! Please, anyone message me whenever! I will always be open.

:)

Seeking a partner for accountability and recovery is helpful when you want to recovery and are willing to keep one another accountable. An accountability partner should not equate to someone to just bounce unproductive comments off... in other words, a partner should not be someone to just compare to or compete with. While it helps to vent you need to genuinely work on recovering from your mistakes as well. We fear this is not what a majority of you are seeking here in this thread.

Although we fully support those who are in active recovery, online support should not be the only support you have. Any of you who does not have an active support team or who has not been to their doctor (or is not being honest with their doctor/parents/counselor) needs to start doing so. You're only sabotaging your own health if you keep your eating disorder a secret.

Please do not post to this thread if you are not in recovery or the thread will be at risk of being locked.

Has anyone got any ideas on what I can do by myself on a Friday/Saturday night, when no-one else is around to visit?  This is my prime time for binging and re-lapsing, as I tend to just be feeling lonely & sorry for myself.  I've done this the past couple weekends which is crap because before that I had done over a whole month without any 'episodes' which was amazing for me!

Any suggestions would be great.  My councellor keeps mentioning I need to plan things to do with my spare time but I'm at a bit of a loose end as to what because many things involve food!!! ahh!

And for anyone who is a big chocolate binger, my tip for them is to try really dark chocolate (like 70% cocoa) when they're really wanting something sweet but is fearing it will lead to the worst.  It's almost impossible to do because it's just too bitter and so you can't just wolf it down without tasting or thinking about it like you can milk chocolate.  It really works!

Just so you know, weightloss and eating disorder recovery really do not go together. Get the e/d in check first, and then under careful supervision from a doctor, work on the healthy weight thing.

was this reply to me or others?

Alot of ppl are seeing docters and it hasnt been working. this is something new that might actually work with the support of others.