Why Do People Try & Test You??

First, My Stats:

Frankie, 25, SW- 285, CW - 276.4, GW - 185

Now i've decided to loose the weight, now i'm confident that this time i WILL do it and there's no going back, now i've lost nearly 9lb within 11 days and feel great.....Now is when all the people who have coax me into loosing weight are trying to test me!!!

WHY??!!

How many time's in the past have you gone for the cake and someone's given you that...."Should you really have that?" look?? And yet now your loosing the weight and feel good about it, they are practically shoving cake in your face!!!!!

I guess i have shocked people that even though it only been 11 days, i have not given into temptation...yet...and i wont!

I have watched my husband eat chocolate while i had grapes! My sister ate a pizza from domino's while i had my chicken and veg!, my friend who's on a diet too had an ice cream saying we should have the day off and nearly fainted when i didn't have one, and went on about it for the rest of the day!! LOL!

Everyone is offering me things or asking what i'm eating and will not take "no, i'm dieting for an answer!!!" Yet i'm sure if i gave in and ordered myself a take away they would be the first people to say..."Oh its a shame, you were doing so well!!"

I just want people to be supportive and encourage me and realise i'm serious about this and it would go a lot easier if i could go just one week without someone saying, "go on, just have the one!!!!!"

Anyone else know what i mean??

Frankie xxx

You are not alone.  Contrariness seems to be part of being human. 

What I hate though is if I take a break at some point I know I have to get back to the diet - and bam!  Suddenly everyone wants to go out to eat.  I dont mind eating out when I am dieting.  I still make good choices - but it is harder to maintain a deficit.  And very hard to say no to people who think they know what is best for you!  lol

YES! I've been working on losing weight for a year now and their behavior is getting old, but still.. Why when I wasn't watching what I eat we never had food at home and suddenly we always have cake, ice cream and other stuff..? Before I began my diet my father would always ask me "are you really eating that? should you?" and stuff and suddenly when I got on a diet (don't remember if I lost weight by then though) he began offering me stuff. And I KNOW they aren't sabotaging me cuz they do want what's best for me, but it's still weird. The weirdest is my mother trying to give me food to take with me when going to friends, so she can be sure I have something to eat. Do ignore them or try to explain they could sabotage your efforts by doing what they are doing.

Congratz on the weight loss so far and good luck!!

I know exactly how you feel! I have been experiencing this for several weeks lately. All of a sudden it seems like it's everyone's mission to knock me off the healthy food. "one day won't hurt" I know myself and yes it will! It will start me off on problems.

"Life is too short to diet" "Let's go out" "one piece of cake won't kill you" It seems like they all want me to fail...though I know that can't be it, can it?

The thing I notice is that it is often other friends who are overweight but not always. I am surrounded by very underweight people as well and they seem even more determined to cause temptations, while they pick at their plates and talk about how 'full' they are after half a sandwich. I must admit I do get somewhat resentful and, like you, wish for a little more support.

People don't like change.  You getting thinner (or making substantial changes to your eating habits) is change and therefore upsets them.  It's irrational and unfair, but it's life.  There may also be something to the idea that they subconsciously don't want you to succeed because that would mean (to them) that they should eat healthier too and they'd rather tell themselves that we just are the weight we're meant to be and there's nothing you can do about it.

yup, I call them Haters, but as long as you recognize their behavior then you will be fine.

people try to ruin my diet too.  Just think to yourself and tell yourself not to give in.  ( wish i could listen to my own advice, haha)

You know what pisses me off? Its bad enough when people try and tempt you when they know you are on a diet and trying to be good, but when they actually seem like they are offended that you dont eat whatever it is they are trying to push at you! I always used to be so nice and wishy washy about it, but anymore I just tell them "What the hell does it matter to you one way or another what I put in my mouth?!" Its sometimes harsh but look at what they are doing to you!

wow, 9lb in 11 days! that is a true acomplishment, and inspiration, thank you for letting those like me know, I thought it was just me

I have run across more subtle insults, disguised as support, like "I heard that is not good for your heart"

or

"did you see that news report about how fat Americans are?" during dinner

or

the boyfriend, to the waiter "she doesn't want that" while he confidently smiles at me thinking he did me a favor by not giving me a bread roll (while secretly I'm trying not to get offended enough to cry from either embarrassment or hunger)

etc, etc, etc.

so my pet peeve is the sarcastic, insincerity they designed to make me give up

I feel like some people ( like my best friend) want me to fail because they are scared if I succeed, they have no more excuses to be overweight, but if I succeed i'll forget their friendship and not want to be friends anymore because I am already doing well.

It hurts me anyone would think I would judge anyone that way, but they still sabotage my progress.

I am thankful for this form where other people are feeling the same thing.

A lot of people do feel threatened and insecure when other people do something they think they should be doing themselves. Part of them wants you to fail so they can feel superior to you and reassure themselves that it's no use trying to lose weight because no one can really succeed. They're not all the same people who will smugly lecture you if you eat something they consider unhealthy, but I think there is some overlap.

Holy crap! Was that your boyfriend who said that?! How awful!!

When I was younger I was heavy then too and I know my mom meant well, but she always had me on a diet. I remember I would be hungry between meals or whatever and she wouldnt let me eat and that would make me so incredibly mad and embarrassed that I had even requested food in the first place.

First - I just want to say that I don't believe in cutting off sweets or treats completely. They should be a part of your diet, but controlled portions that are entered into your daily allowance. I know everyone has the best intentions, but it's been proven that going completely cold turkey leads to binging. It also demonizes the foods, which just leads to a twisted perspective on nutrition. You just have to count them into your daily allowance and not consider it 'cheating', because...cheating = guilt and lifestyle changes should be positive!

But because I've had this attitude, sometimes I get looks like 'aren't you on a diet?' when i get a scoop of frozen yogurt or a cookie. My answer is always a) It's not  a diet, it's a lifestyle change and b) Funny how I've been eating that for five months and lost over 40 pounds. It usually shuts people up.

Oh dont get me wrong i'll be having a treat now and again, but sometimes i think all those calories just for one chocolate bar?....Just not worth it!....and decide to go without.

Frankie xxx

I've encountered the same thing at work where everyone would presume to know what my diet should be and thought telling me about it would somehow be helpful.  Then, when I started counting and upping the exercise, they suddenly start going out for mcdonald's and trying to shove it down my throat.  My least favourite words are now "come ooooooooon...  just have it!"

Try to ignore such people.  They are feeling stupid now that you're showing them that your determination and willpower is so much greater than theirs.  Generally these types of people would fail miserably on a diet or lifestyle change.