LOCKED TOPIC

PLEASE!! Someone STOP me before I'll commit SUICIDE!!!!

I need help!! I can't call my nutritionist right now and I have benn OVEREAT in a scary amount. I'm recovering from ED and now I feel like I have a habit of obese!! I'll sabutage myself for many times. I have been eating around 1600-1800 calories (maintaining) for the entire week. I'm 16 years old, 5"1 and I was 108 pounds (gain from 102) and I almost bang my head against the wall because I have been eating soo much and I feel so guilty over it. I can't go to the gym because the school gym is not open (I'm in a boarding school....thousand miles away from my parents in Thailand)

This is what I had today..

Breakfast: 1 pint = 4 serving ice cream (140 calories per serving) + 1 medium orange + 1 medium apple

Lunch: 4 bites of chicken marsala + 1 small baked potatoe + 1 dannon fuit on the bottom yogurt

snack: 4 cups dry multi-grain cheerios cereal

*** bad stomach pain so I went running/walking for half an hour and fall asleep)

Dinner: 4 bits of grilled chicken + 4 small little babies carrots + 1 medium orange + 1 small sardine fish + 4 bites of white rice + half of small baked potato

--- sad part of the day--- : after dinner: 2 tbsp of nutella + 1 ferrero ball + 1 milky way snack size (like 70 calories each)

I feel like I want to kill myself...I can feel that my stomach sticking out and bloat and fat and all....I don't know what else to do. I can't call my parents coz they wouldn't understand. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE...somebody tell me it's ok. I don't know what to do tomorrow!!!! I can't keep doing this to myself!! HELP!!!!!!!

Hey girl, first off take a deep breath! now don't even think about commiting suicide over something so silly as food, thats not even a joke! it doesn't even look like you ate THAT much, you will be totally fine. one day of messing up won't do any thing.
Your first mistake was starting your day off with ice cream. especially four servings of it. Often times i find myself binging all day if i don't get a healthy breakfast, so if you start your day with healthy, your more liekly to continue the pattern. make a specific meal plan for tommorow, with a healthy breakfast, and enough snacks in between to keep you full.! good luck

Charme: Take a deep breathe----Do you have any friend that you can talk to?

Just realize one thing---You ate pretty good today--it could have been a lot worse--and just think--you can turn it all around tomorrrow--how great is that? It's nice knowing that one day won't ruin the whole week---Is it too late to go out for a walk? get some fresh air? Do you have any plans on hurting yourself? Or just thoughts because your so upset about the day? I bet you are a very loved person and people would to see you going through this--are you sure you can't talk to anyone?

Relax.  Everything is fine.  Tomorrow you can start again.  But I would throw out all the foods that tempt you to go off your diet.  No need to test yourself like that. Just have things that are good for you around, so even if you are compelled to over-eat, it won't be as bad.  Good luck.  All will be fine.

 

G

O kay. calm down, you have done nothing wrong.

You had a regular teen day.  You treated yourself.  Tomorrow you go back to eating 1800 calories.  Go for a walk or have a glass of water, but calm down please.

Just to tell you id edit the post, any mod sees this or any "higher up" they will be required to call law enforcment and trace the computer (if they can)... or they risk becoming liable for your death should you do anything.

Everybody has a bad day!  It's OK.  Everybody eats junk once in a while!  Remember that it takes 3500 calories extra to gain a pound.  You'll be just fine!

You should fine someone to talk to face-to-face...if only to get your mind off it!

I'm trying to tell myself to calm down. It's hard considering I ate very little before..now everything seems a lot. I know it sounds disgusting when I whining over something like ED. I didnt' choose to have ED but I got them and I didn't realized it. I'm sorry if I would sounds disgusting to you guys. I really want to have a noce breakfast but I'm in a dorm and we are not allowed to have a fridge so I can't have anything. All the school available for weekend breakfast is fruits/ donuts/ sugary + frost flake cereal + water......

I'm trying to calm down. Thank you for your support. I wish my parents understand the situation like you guys did.

Sorry if my post sounds pathethic and stupid. I just don't know who else to turn to right now.

Please calm down...we have all had worse eating days.  It sucks at the end of the day, but guess what?  Tomorrow is a new start.  You can't beat yourself up over food...put this all in perspective.  This isn't the worst thing that could be happening right now, right?

Is there anyone "real" you can talk to?  A friend who is actually there with you?  If not, there are suicide hotlines and you can talk to someone over the phone, which is probably better than online.

Here is one:
1.800.442.HOPE

Please feel better!

That's normal for an average person. You need a psychiatrist. Honestly. You're thinking about killing yourself over a NORMAL BIOLOGICAL FUNCTION; eating. You're the only person who cares about how you look - are you afraid of being judged? If you're underweight and still starving yourself THEN you're probably being judged by others. You're taking a step in the right direction; don't take two steps back. You need those calories. You need to nutrients to be beautiful, happy, and healthy again. Keep pushing forward! Show your strength! You can overcome this speed bump. Don't let your illness beat you!
Take care, please.

Try this, it seems to help some people relieve their stress and change the way they think.  You may have to repeat it a few times and it looks silly, but it works

ALL my friends are in New York today (I can't go because I have so much study to do.) The girls that are left in the dorm are not close to me. I'm trying not to stare at the wall right now because I hate the idea of hurting myself. And I have a stomach pain right now (due to overeat). I havn't been overeat for soooo long.

You guys are so generous. I'm taking a deep breath...very very deep one. I hope starting tomorrow would be OK. But what should I have for breakfast (since my school doesn't provide anything)

fruits and milk?

that's right lovely--how bout fruits, milk, 1 cup of cereal or half a bowel full (if it's a descent size) and 1 cup of milk on the cereal--very balanced and good for you..

  Was there a reason behind the binge? Emotional maybe? Or were you just craving something (ice cream... maybe your body wants more dairy?)

   Sometimes when I start to crave something there is a reason, I can usually satisfy my craving, unless I've gone past a safe point and now I'm totally starving. Starving usually brings up the carb-crazies with me.

   Don't panic, feed your body small meals throughout the day, no starvation.

   As for needing a psychiatrist... I don't think so, the over-the-top emotions you feel are because your body chemistry is knocked out of whack, tomorrow will be better. Sugar amplifies, brings out the panic mode.

   There are thousands of people here, talk to us. We're here!

 

Well, my cereal are gone...and I'm not sure having a very sugary frost flake for breakfast will be a good idea. Would an orange and a cup of milk work?

Talking with you guys really help. At least...it gets my mind out of it. It's a bit harder being an Asian since Asian people tends to have smaller frame and our BMI is actually no more than 23 (23 for most asian and 24 for Europian people). I'm very very afraid I'll gain so much weight coming to America because all the fast food and chhesy stuff (considering I don't have much option....school food 3 meals a day, no fridge, no kitchen..)

Sorry again of my post waste your time. But everyone here are so nice and I was very desparate a minute ago. (I sereiously have my hands aginst the well). Hurting myself over food is ridiculous....

Charm,

I agree--with you--that your life is way more important than food---I bet you are so loved

I honestly don't think the sugary cereal (if that is your only option will be that bad for you) as long as you don't have a lot--but it does bother you then ya have  like 2 cups of milk and 2 or 3 oranges--and some other fruit if it is an option...then make sure to make up for it at lunch--with a big salad and some grilled chicken  or something (And I hope you are taking a multi-vitamin)--Are you seeing a counselor or just your nutritionist? I'm just curious--I want to make sure you have someone to talk to when we are not here. Let us know if you need anything else--you certainly are not wasting my time--just want to make sure your 'ok'

I hope this is not the wrong thing to say, and it sounds like you're feeling a bit better now. I just want to add that WOW I DID THAT EVERY DAY FOR 3 WEEKS OR SO WHEN I WAS RECOVERING. (No, seriously, I binged and almost finished an 8-oz bag of pistachio nuts, something like 1200+ calories). I woke up the next morning and the scale hadn't budged. Seriously.

I've calculated the total amount of calories (approximately) that you listed. The good news is - you're barely over 2000 calories. Since you're a teen, the MOST you could POSSIBLY gain from this experience is 0.06 lbs.

I know you're in recovery, and is trying to maintain your weight now. I've read your previous posts before, and wow - you got healthier MUCH faster than I did. Try to keep it up! Think of today as a treat day, and get back on track as fast as you can - which you're doing right now.

Like everyone's been telling you here - tomorrow is a new day. I think an orange and a cup of milk is good. Better something healthy than nothing at all or something sugary!

Good luck! ^_^

I only see a nutritionist every 2 weeks. Living in a dorm is a bit harder....every girls hate the idea od ED. I can't really tell people who are not my friends about what I have done to myself 3 months ago (as in not eating). It's a disaster putting a bunch of girls together like this. Everyone just look at each other -- see what they are eating -- tell other that they are not fat and saying that they themselves are fat when actually they are not. They said people with ED disgust them but it seems like they all want to have ED. It's a crazy world!!

Well...I guess I'm going to have some fruits and milk for breakfast. I don't know what can I have for lunch because school usually have leftover for weekend lunch and dinner...I can do this...! Thank you a million times for everyone support! Good luck on your diet as well!

i've been exactly where you are.

i had a big binging problem and went from 107 to about 140. when i saw my scale hit 140 i decided i was going to kill myself because i was simply too fat to live.

i told my bestfriend what i was going to do and she phoned my mom's cellphone and my mom had an ambulance take me to the hospital. when everyone kept asking me why i did it, i felt so silly for saying "i felt too fat to live" and realized that i had an eating disorder that needed to be treated.

tell your parents, or tell a friend. tell somebody, because you need help. <3

Charm email me if you need anything else--take care of yourself! Do what's best for you, so if not eating with those girls helps--then don't eat with them! You are number one--in the long run they won't be around anyways so take care of yourself (Hug)))