The Point Of No Return

I have reached 57/58 or so kg, which is a healthy BMI for my height of 170 cm.  Of course, as we know, the BMI system is not definitive, and people who are the same heights may have very different healthy weights.   

So now I'm wondering if I should gain a bit more, or start maintanence.  In the latter case, I have no idea how many cals I should eat to maintain.  I used CC's calculators to come up with 2200 cals, taking my exercise into account.  But of course, this is for someone with a normal metabolism, and recovered anorexic folk often need higher cals for a while to maintain.  Or that's the story, anyway.  Plus I really don't know how far to trust CC's calculators in any event.

As we know, losing any weight at this point risks triggering a relapse.  I've been there twice before, and really should stop repeating myself.  Third time's the charm, they say. 

Thanks so much in advance for everyone's help.  Any advice is sure to be most welcome.

Stay strong, and keep going, everyone.

All the best,

Mel. xox

What BMI does that make you, numerically? How many calories have you been eating now? CC's calculators aren't going to apply to you, here, really, and if I remember rightly you've been eating MUCH more.

Your stats sound perfectly healthy to me.

Except that if she has been eating something like 3500 calories a day, she will need to decrease slowly by 250 a week into maintainance and not make a sudden sharp drop.

Take what you've been eating to gain weight and reduce it very, very gradually until you stop gaining.   Just 100 or 200 cals less each week.  If you do it that way, you may gain a kilo or two more but, since you're at the low end of a healthy weight, that'll just give you a little insurance against illness or relapse. 

Make any adjustments gradually since any sniff of 'restriction' could put you on a slippery slope.   It takes easily 6 months to go from changing weight to maintaining weight.... either way.   So you'll slip up along the way to normality but don't let it throw you.   And try, at the same time, to wean yourself off calorie counting.... think more about enjoying what you eat, having fun around food, getting more variety, regular meals, sensible portions.  Once numbers stop being attached it's easier not to obsess.

Congradulations on reaching a healthy weight Mel. I know its been a hard road to get there, but you've been so incredibly determined - its inspiring.

When I left my last IP, after being on 4500+ every day, they gave me a "maintenance" plan of 2200-2400 calories in food, with 3 Ensure Plus drinks to continue gaining.

Okay, I admit - I was bad - I did not want to ever drink another Ensure again after having to survive off it so long. So I was not drinking the Ensures. But I was still eating 6 times a day, and getting the 2400 calories (if not more) they claimed I needed for maintenance.

Now, I know by the time I dropped to my lowest, I was no longer eating that amount. But I lost a good ten pounds in a matter of maybe 10 days. Eating what was allegedly my maintainence calories. And after that it all spiralled down.

Like others have said, don't make any drastic changes in your diet - only subract 100-200 calories per day, each week. Technically, lets say you were gaining 2 pounds a week eating 4000 calories. That means you were eating 1,000 calories over your burn everyday, assuming that 500 calories extra for 7 days = 1 pound. So you probably wouldn't want to go below 3,000 for quite some time, seems to me that in most cases, the lovely suped-up metabolism sticks around for at least six months if not longer.

Wow!  well done.  it's inspiring to read your post.

awesome! Youre bmi is a t least 20? great!

Thanks so much, everyone!  My BMI is 19.7 to 20.  20, I think, because today I was again 58. Anyway, I ate 3500 cals per day last week, so I definitely plan to decrease gradually.  As GI Jane said, it doesn't matter if I gain a bit more.  I don't want to relapse.

So far, so good.  I had a bit of a bad day yesterday with ED thoughts, but didn't let it affect my eating.  Today I felt fine and dandy again.  Like the metabolism, the brain takes a good six months or more to recover, depending on factors such as the ED's severity, so you just have to ride it out when you have bad moments.  And I have had far more good times than bad, so don't let it put you off! 

Thanks again, everyone.  One thing's for sure, if I lose any weight, I'll be upping my cals immediately.

Hope everyone else is coming along well.  Look forward to having other folks to maintain with!

All the best,

Mel. xox

Congratulations thats so good! like others have said its very inspirational!! What I'd like to ask though is how did you find the weight distribution? I mean we all know how weight doesn't always come back on in the way that we'd most like but how did you deal with this/was it an issue for you? well done again =)

Thanks, eskimo82.

Well, at first the weight was going to my stomach mainly, but it's getting more flat now.  Some's gone to my behind, and some's gone to my thighs, which means I now have some womanly shape and curves, although not majorly pronounced.  I've always been rather straight up and down, so this makes sense.  I've never had much in the way of boobs, but my chest is slightly larger too.  Mostly, though, the weight's filled out my upper arms, and made my collar bones and shoulder bones etc stick out less. 

It takes a little getting used to, but I find that now I see things that are improvements.  For example, I used to have big bags under my eyes, and a drawn face, and friends and family have commented on how much better my face looks now.  As well, my skin is better, my eyes are brighter, and my hair is shinier.  Also, because I now have some shape to my hips, I have a bit of a waist instead of being rectangular in shape.  Things like that. 

Also, I have people suggesting I could perhaps use a little more weight yet.  My mum asked my uncle, "Doesn't she look much better now?"  My uncle answered, "Still a bit of a greyhound (he's always loved taunting me), but yes."  My aunt said, "No, she's a Thoroughbred (I love horses)."  So who knows?  Perhaps I should take their advice, and gain a few more kilos. 

I wish I were more shapely, but the thing is we're all meant to be different shapes and sizes, which are all beautiful in their own ways. 

All the best,

Mel. xox

'Shapely'... means hips, waist, bust...    If you want to have the classic hourglass figure, add on another few kilos and you won't be disappointed.  Alternatively you can give the illusion of an hourglass figure with clever dressing.  A full skirt with a wide belt makes hips look bigger and waists smaller, for example.  If you're flat-chested, avoid low necklines.  There are lots of ways.

Thanks for that - sounds positive!! Great to hear from someone whos done it!!

No problems, eskimo82.  Hope it was helpful.  I wouldn't stress too much about weight distribution. 

Thanks for the advice, gi_jane.  I maintained last week at 3250 cals, so I'm going with 3000 this week.  I might gain some weight in the process of working out my maintenance level anyway, so I'll see how I go.

Again, many thanks and best wishes to everyone.

Melynda. xox