Do you think it is possible to love yourself without being skinny?

Just wondering what some of your thoughts are on this. With all the pressure out there to look a certain way and have a perfect body, do you think it is possible to accept yourself and love yourself when what you see in the mirror is less than perfect?

Yes, of course. It's sad that some people really base their self esteem and happiness on their outside appearance. You know....one day you will be old and wrinkly and you will have nothing left to depend on then....gasp! your personality. And your relationships and friendships and faith and health and intellect. A confident and truly happy person is beautiful no matter what size. I love myself and my body and I'm not skinny. I doubt I would be much happier if I was. The only benefit I can think of is that I may feel a bit "lighter". It is silly that so many people are brainwashed into feeling "pressured" to be thin.

What you are really saying is that you need other's approval and acceptance of you to be happy and you feel that you must be thin to get that approval and acceptance. That's the way that I see it at least.

ive seen online at like people magazince/ us weekly, etc of gorgeous thin models and lovely actresses only to have comments left on there "she's too skinny, she's ugly, she has fat toes, blah blah blah."  no matter how you look SOMEONE is going to criticize you, its cruel.  every one is unique and will never be PERFECT like everyone expects.

I can unreservedly promise you that being "skinny" and even having what society deems a perfect body is not the be all and end all.  If it inspires confidence that's a plus, but at the end of the day that kind of body confidence will always be somewhat superficial; it's not wearing a size 0 jean that will make you love your body and therefore move confidently through life. Rather, it's the personality and thought patterns in our minds -- in other words, the parts that are NOT immediately visible when we walk down the street -- that can eventually bring that boost of self-esteem. 

I honestly believe that "gorgeousness", or sometimes the lack thereof, is found in the subtleties of how people carry themselves, interact with others, deal with everyday adversity, that kind of thing. I've always been awestruck by, and a little jealous of, those people with magnetic and ebullient personalities, who can inspire confidence in everyone around them by how they carry themselves -- but some of these "gorgeous" people I admire wouldn't look good in pictures and are not skinny. The way people move, think and feel doesn't lend itself to being captured by paparazzi and it doesn't sell magazines, so instead we're fed this myth that being skinny brings happiness...

There's no way it's that straightforward. You're right that everyone's unique, and the way we learn to honestly look ourselves in the mirror and love ourselves varies from person to person. The fun, and often the challenge, lies in trying to find what works for each of us.

i just wanted to say that I absolutely love this thread and reading everyone's inspiring replies.

I love myself. Plain and simple. And I love myself for aspects that are unrelated to what size I am and how much I weigh. When I look in the mirror, I see ME, and I don't focus on the perceived "flaws" in my appearance according to the idiots in Hollywood. It takes time to build yourself as a person and develop personality traits that will carry you through your life, and focusing strictly on your appearance makes you a shallow person and you can overlook what's really important. Why spend your life trying to fit into a certain size when you can do so many more meaningful and rewarding things?

Again, I love myself, and I will love myself no matter what weight I am.

I am happiest when I am not thinking about my body. when I am not thinking about whether I am fat or thin. when I am not thinking about having to gain weight or needing to lose weight. I am happiest when I realize, it doesn't matter at all.

thank God there's more to life than what size you are (or what size you aren't, for that matter).

I will admit, I often fool myself into thinking I was happiest when I was thinnest. then I remember the big picture. sobbing on the bathroom floor. not going out because I felt fat in my clothes that day. not being able to trust myself alone in the kitchen. etc.

the slight rush of seeing the numbers on the scale go down was not worth any of that. I wasn't happy. I was miserable. I hated myself so badly.

here I am now, sizes bigger and more or less free. I can think about life again. I'm happier. there is still the struggle of looking in the mirror and telling myself I'm fat... then I say, "It doesn't matter." I never thought I could say that. I never thought I could weigh over 80 pounds and be able to smile at the mirror.

sorry for the rambling. here's  the breakdown: in my opinion, happiness and self-love should have nothing to do with what size you are.

Original Post by happinesswhereartthou:

carolann. what you said really hit home. I had just gotten off of the phone confessing to my sister about my eating disorder, and me telling her how "i just want to be skinny". But at what cost? My health? My life? And after praying to God, I read your post, and it really hit home for me. Whenever I get side-tracked, I'll keep your story in mind.

 Happinesswhereartthou--I am glad my post gave your some insight. Keep praying. Write me off-line if you want more support! Stay healthy. Stay happy.

The happiest Ive ever been is when I haven't been thinking about how I look or how other people think I look. The times when what I was doing, or the people I was with were actually more important than MY Weight or how I looked.

I love that freedom from yourself. I wish I could have it now, and damn it's taking so much work to allow myself to let go, but I know I'm not happy now being this skinny. I just want to be me.

To be honest I don't think I've ever found true happiness in any number that I've weighed. I mean I've found areas where I'm more comfortable in myself..but it never stays. At any weight I'll have confident days where I'll strut what I have, then on other days I find some stupid little flaw and I'm like "Ick!" So whether I'm skinny or not I'll find something I'm proud of or something I'm not. So for my answer is I'm in between. :P