Getting Pregnant Woes

Reading through a couple pregnancy threads it seems some women get pregnant really fast!

My husband and I got married 6 months ago and have been trying to get pregnant ever since, but nothing's happening. Neither one of us has kids and I'm starting to get a bit worried since I'm 32 (he's 34). I know that it usually takes up to a year for 'normal' couples to get pregnant, but I can't help being concerned.  

Do any of you "older" moms have any insight?

One thing I know you have to do is relax.  The harder you try, the harder it will be to get pregnant.  It has happened over and over that a couple who can't get pregnant, adopt a baby, then, as soon as the pressure is off, they get pregnant.

Just enjoy each other right now.  When the baby comes, you will go days without even looking at your spouse because the baby will take so much of your time, not to mention  your money.

Have dates, be together, plant flowers, fix up your home, earn extra money at work, plan a great vacation.  Lose track of time on the calendar.  Before you know it you'll be thinking, "It seems like it's been a long time since my last period."  You'll count your days, and low and behold, realize you should go buy a pregnancy test.

Best of luck and don't let your family and friends ask you every month, "Well..."

Concentrate on your new marriage and everything will fall into place the way it should.

I highly suggest the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility."  It will teach you everything you ever wanted to know about your cycle, and you'll become a master at tracking your fertility signs.  Your body is amazing and lets you know when you are ovulating if you just take the time to learn about it.  It's worked for many of my friendS! Oh, and I'm 37 and pregnant for the second time, so I think that qualifies as "older mama" :)

Were you talking birth control pills before you started trying to concieve? If you were it can take about 6 months to ovulate again. Sometimes a full year. Relax and keep at it ;)

Thanks for the responses!

machatica-

I put that book on my reading list...Thanks!

fit4-

No, I haven't taken any BC in 10 years (used condoms) so I know that's not it, but thank you

32 is not "older"!!  I hope!

 

 

My mother was 39 when she had my youngest brother (I have an older sister and two younger brothers) and other mums I know had kids into their early forties. So you have plenty of time left!

Original Post by dog_lady:

32 is not "older"!!  I hope!

 

 

 Lol, I didn't mean older as in "older than dirt" (haha), just older than the average age most women start having kids.  

Thanks, meryl ...my mom also had 2 other kids...one when she was 38 and the last when she was almost 40, so I know there's hope. I guess it seems like alot of women get pregnant within 6 months of trying (if they weren't using BC or had other issues) so I'm feeling a bit gloomy.  

Original Post by hotrebeccainmesa:

I guess it seems like alot of women get pregnant within 6 months of trying (if they weren't using BC or had other issues) so I'm feeling a bit gloomy.  

 I know it seems like a lot of women here on CC had no issues getting pregnant. They are definitely NOT the norm, though.

When we decided to have a second child, we were aggressive! I charted, planned, used ovulation tests, the works! I was pregnant within two weeks of my last period. I have a girlfriend who started trying for a second around the same time we did but just stopped preventing rather than actually trying. It took her 6 months to get pregnant.

Fertilityfriend.com is a great planning website! Good luck!

It took my and my husband 1 years of not preventing and one year of charting to get pregnant.  I was 25 and he was 29.

I second the recommendation for Fertilityfriend.com, if your serious about having a baby you should be charting.

Thank you, bier & harmony-

I really appreciate the site recommendation. It never occurred to me that stopping prevention and trying are 2 different things! Duh! 

my friends mom is in her late 30's i believe and she is pregnant. but i have a question. and i feel terrible that i am saying this, but does anyone have any suggestions for my situation. i have not had my period for two months. im on birth control and have been since july. i had sex in august and the only thing ive gotten close to a period is heavy breakthrough bleeding since i had just started my birth control but now nothing im terrified, the guy is no longer with me and idk what im going to do. ive taken two tests one last month n one this month n both were negative please help 

Original Post by ohnohelpme:

my friends mom is in her late 30's i believe and she is pregnant. but i have a question. and i feel terrible that i am saying this, but does anyone have any suggestions for my situation. i have not had my period for two months. im on birth control and have been since july. i had sex in august and the only thing ive gotten close to a period is heavy breakthrough bleeding since i had just started my birth control but now nothing im terrified, the guy is no longer with me and idk what im going to do. ive taken two tests one last month n one this month n both were negative please help 

Hey! Go get your own thread!  jk

My question is why haven't you gone to your ob-gyn yet?

because im 17 and terrified, i was told the breakthrough bleeding is normal the first 3-4 months on bc n ive been stresssed so that could n y im not getting it. i took another test today n it was negative

Original Post by ohnohelpme:

because im 17 and terrified, i was told the breakthrough bleeding is normal the first 3-4 months on bc n ive been stresssed so that could n y im not getting it. i took another test today n it was negative

 Well, if you're terrified then what is being oblivious going to help? I don't mean to be rude but you need to see a doctor. The rule of thumb is make an appointment if you've missed three consecutive periods.

You may not be tolerating the particular brand or type of birth control or your body is still adjusting to all the hormones. Are you skipping over the last week of your pills and going straight to a new pack? That would cause to to miss periods.

You need to see your OBGYN. Simple as that. We can offer support and guesses but nothing more. If you have any other questions/comments, please consider starting your own topic :)

hotrebeccainmesa, I hope you're pregnant quickly when you shift from "not preventing" to trying!

Thanks, bier! ;)

I think you are on the right track now that you have shifted your mindset!  If you have regular cycles (I did not) then charting is the way to go! I went off of the bc pill last December.  My husband and I started "trying" in April and I just got pregnant in September.  I understand how you feel b/c I was ready for serious intervention after 5 months, even though it is totally normal to take that long.  It will happen for you.  It just takes time.  I think we are so hard wired to believe that you will get pregnant if you DON'T use preventative measures.  Then, when you stop using them, you just assume you'll be pregnant immediately! Now that I'm pregnant, I see that I just needed to be patient, but I understand that it is hard when you are waiting.  Once you read up on things, you will find that you have to do the deed within a certain time frame of when you ovulate.  That is key! If you can figure out when you are ovulating, it really helps!  If not, you will have to go to an every other day or everyday schedule, which can get exhausting ;)  GOOD LUCK!  Don't get discouraged!

Thanks for sharing, mandyts...and Congrats!

I am 32 years old and I just gave birth to my first child three weeks ago.  That being said, we tried for 3 years to get pregnant.  I had extremely irregular periods and complained to my doctors after 6 months of trying and not getting pregnant.  They told me to try another 6 months.  It turned out in the end that I have PCOS.  My recommendation is to start charting your cycles and really make sure that you understand your cycles.  If you are not pregnant in another 6 months, go to your OB/GYN.  They can run some simple blood tests on your hormones to see if things are running the way you should.  Don't get discouraged.  I remember crying last Thanksgiving because I thought I would never have a baby.  This year I have so much to be thankful for.  Best of luck to you!!! 

What a wonderful story!...thanks, rooper. I've been tracking my periods for the past couple of years...I have a very regular 26-day cycle. I'm trying to get the hang of learning the signs of ovulation.

Congrats on baby rooper :)