**Update** I hit my target goal of 195!!!!! :)

I have lost 65Lbs just changing the way I eat. I am currently at 195 and my goal weight is 195.

As I am going through this divorce, I am finding that I am discovering things about myself I never knew existed. I have become a totally different person, I have realized there is soo much more to life then what I was living.

I was totally depressed at first when the soon to be ex filed for divorce and told me how unhappy she was for the last couple of years and hearing this is what make me totally change my life "You are uncapable of making anyone happy other then yourself" I was at a total loss of words at that point, so I made the decision to change my life because maybe I wasn't living the life I should be.

I know at first it was very difficult for me to accept the fact that she wanted to end this marriage so I started to take a look at the reasons in which I failed in the marriage and I was able to identify a few issues and decided I might need some help from a counsler and say him a couple of times to get me onto the right track. He helped me understand some of my insecurites and becoming a better person. Anyone going through a divorce or a break up, you have to first realize that there is going to be life after your soon to be ex. That was the hardest for me to accept, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel! :)

I am finding out that being alone isn't as scarry and hard as I had originally thought it would be. I mean, its not easy coming home to an empty house but with time, I am sure that will pass. :)

sometimes you feel tired, feel weak, and when you feel weak, you feel like you wanna just give up. But you gotta search within you, you gotta find that inner strength and just pull that sh!t out of you and get that motivation to not give up and not be a quitter, no matter how bad you wanna just fall flat on your face and collapse