Posts by coffincritter

Be honest with both of them about what's going on. I know these situations are sticky--I have a friend who insists on remaining friendly with the ex I detest. I don't like it, but I also know that at the end of the day you can't really tell people who they can and can't hang out with.

((cptbunny))

I don't think it's so unreasonable to want a little support, especially if you notice a difference in how you and your brother are treated. I think it's as much about the emotional support as it is the actual ride. And i know anxiety isn't a walk in the park. 

As for getting there early, maybe you can take some little walks around the school campus to refocus your mind from the anxiety? My therapist taught me once to do these little walking meditations (when time permits) where I focus intently on every physical thing around me, or you can do it in a room. It does kind of help to shift your mind. Or maybe bring along a good book to read during the downtime, something you can get drawn into to shift your focus.

Original Post by luhluhlovesongs:

I hope you're not calling the Twilight Movie artsy.

Yeah, I was like "artsy"?

The first one me and my friends saw as a goof--got pretty drunk and laughed through the whole thing. Interestingly enough, I think everyone in our audience had the same idea since the whole theater was giggling. This time, I dunno, money is tighter for me, so for $12.50 a movie we may just wait for the dvd.

Original Post by afluffyadorablebunny:

Coffinwriter,who are you defending and why??

You should not defend those men just because they have the same ethnicity as you..you should demean those acts..

The men that stare like muttlover has put it..it is exactly like that..they do not look at my face first..they look at my private parts first..they undress you while you are just walking minding your own business..one guy said to me once " I just ate you up with my eyes " .. as if I would like that...those men have no manners at all..no morals..no courtesies whatsoever..they treat women like we are all worthless beings..like pieces of meat..and over here,they do not just stare...they reach their hands to touch your body..front..back..up..down..there is no escape from that..it just always happens..it is the way things are..and then they go on their ways laughing with their friends..and I'd go home feeling like...it is just not right...it can't be okay.

Again--Who am I to tell you what you should or shouldn't do anyways..but it is the same way around here..the women can be worse than the men..the women defend the men..their abusive acts..and demean the victims..you will find women oppressing their daughters and other young girls..it is the woman who takes her daughter to have her mutilated..to have her clit cut off of her...it is the women also who blame the girl..whatever happened..it had to be the girl's fault..while the girl is mostly the victim..

Mothers can be like that...I am not sure why...I try to understand but I can't...I have been trying to understand why things are the way they are here...I have no clue...maybe they are just cruel and selfish? they were brought up with those things happening to them and now they pass them over to the next generation of the young girls ?

But..I still do not get it..if I was abused or treated like trash..beaten and harassed..why would I accept that to happen to my daughter? wouldn't I just try my bestest so that she will be safe and would swear that nothing like that would happen to her as long as I lived?

I do not get it.

 

I'm not defending those acts. I'm just pointing out that Hispanic men don't corner the market on leering. I live in NYC, I've been street harassed by the rainbow of humanity!

And I have noticed on several of muttlover's posts there seems to be this recurring need to mention the Hispanic-ness of whoever she's dealing with. There was the post about the Hispanics resenting her because she's taller than them. Or the one about the Hispanic woman with no job, higher education, and boyfriend broke up with her--why does ethnicity even NEED to figure in to that story?

Also, I've been to Egypt too and encountered a lot of what you described--and at the time at least (late 90's) Egypt was considered a more liberal country in that region! 

Wow, so strange and beautiful. I think sea creatures are some of the most surreal things on the planet.

Original Post by muttlover:

I can't stand how women are treated in certain countries.

I live in Miami, where many Hispanics from different spanish-speaking countries come. A large percent of the Hispanic men here (24 and older) are total creeps. They stare at you with no courtesy whatsoever, and it is very violating. It's like they undress you with their eyes. They will even stare at you/approach you if they are with their girlfriend/wife!

Ugh. :( And that's nothing compared to Egypt and other countries... Now I'm pissy.

You know, I've noticed a lot of your posts seem to harp on Hispanics (and to get everything on the table, I'm half Cuban.) Yeah, I've encountered some lusty and staring Latinos, but I've encountered the same behavior from men of other ethnicities too.

Sounds extremely posessive. Also, given that Facebook is a way of interacting with others (not "sausaging", merely interacting) I wonder if there are attempts to isolate you from having any kind of support system? That could be a red flag.

I love makeup, but I think it should be something that's FUN, not something you NEED to leave the house or not feel ugly. I knew a girl who couldn't even run to the corner for milk without being fully made up, she was a mega-bundle of insecurities too.

I've also gone to the store in my pajama pants--usually if it's late, I discover I need something, but don't feel like getting fully dressed. Anyone who has a problem with it doesn't have to look at me.

P.S. -About the last line in the OP, "the way only women can"--you haven't seen some of the boys in some of the clubs I've been to!

The picture is classic!

I agree that weighing yourself every day is probably futile, since weight can fluctuate a bit on a day to day basis. But I also find hiding and denying someone their personal property a bit too controlling for my tastes.