Posts by dplatzer

Wow that is awesome, you must have a super supportive, wonderful mom!  I definitely think seeing yourself in these new, smaller clothes will provide you w/ even more motivation!  Keep on truckin, you will hit that goal!

Original Post by kkempinski:

Original Post by dplatzer:

Original Post by april_bride:

I don't think you're as abnormal as you think you are. I think this is more common than you think. It takes a loooooooooong time to find someone that you really click with, and it's mutual, and it becomes a relationship. Be patient, you will find someone. You are also still very young. I understand you don't want to necessarily be alone. But what's wrong with dating around until you find someone that you click with and it becomes a relationship?

The other thing I want to say is not intended to be offensive. But it's really hard to know what actually is going on and if you could be doing something that is putting off these men. I think the suggestion of talking to one of them that you've previously dated, is not a bad idea, for that reason.

I'm not saying this applies to you. But I have a very good friend who is seemingly a normal, outgoing, well-adjusted person. When it comes to socializing (platonic), her career and so on. But when it comes to dating she is absolutely psycho. I cannot even talk with her about it anymore because she's so left field and so far removed from reality that it's ridiculous. She complains all the time about why the guys she dates do not stick around. Well, it's because she is totally psychotic.

For example, if she calls a guy and he doesn't call her back within a few hours, she repeatedly texts him and calls him until she does hear from him -- obviously, usually after all that she only hears from him so he can tell her to leave him the heck alone. That is incredibly off-putting and she doesn't have a clue why it's off-putting. No matter who tries to explain to her. She gets jealous, clingy and starts doing these things after only one date. And she can't fathom why men do not stick around for long.

She *needs* a man. She doesn't want a man, she needs it desparately (so she thinks). Men -- and women -- can smell need like that and I think that's also incredibly unattractive (in addition to the other psycho stuff she does).

Again, not saying this is you. Just saying... it's hard to know the facts of what's going on. My friend that does this stuff, she honestly doesn't get why she chases men away. But it's plainly clear to me. When I try to explain my point of view to her, she simply cannot get it (or will not -- I think there is more to the story but won't get into all that here).

 

I totally see what you are saying here, and I am in anything opposite.  I pretty much wait for them to call, but if there is something good going on I may call and extend an invite.  If I do not hear from someone I may contact them one more time, and then if I don't hear back I am done. 

My friend saw He's just not that into you, and said I was exactly like her and I was soooo offended b/c I am NOT like that at all. (though I do go over details again and again with my friends, I am not pyscho at all with the guys!)

I don't think you're like that at all. Can I ask you a serious question? Do you know how many kids you want to have? If so, do you know the first name if it's a boy/girl?

Don't dodge, I have a hypothesis.

I want to have 3 kids prob, and yes, I like the names will (william) and ava.

Original Post by sarahbluebelle:

Dear God, I could've written that OP.  I'm in the same boat.  24, no serious boyfriend since 18 or 19--all of it, and the topic has reduced me to tears (albeit private ones) more than once.  I've begun to think I'm destined to be alone, though everyone assures me that once you give up on it, it happens. 

So, at the risk of sounding cliche, I think we just have to believe that what's meant to be will happen; not necessarily on our timetable.

Sarah, glad to hear I'm not the only one in this boat.  Comfort in numbers!  I wish you the best too, its frustrating to see ALL of your single gfs get coupled up (and in my case, they are starting to move in) with bfs.  Its like great, who do I go out with now!?  Once they start moving in with the bfs they have NO interest in going out except for like once every three months when its like O-M-Geeee lets have a GIRLS NIGHT OUT!! and lets go to some bar with all girls! And then they all tell me the same thign "oh, I met so and so when I just wasn't looking, you should do the same". rolls eyes!

Original Post by kathygator:

Original Post by dplatzer:

Original Post by kathygator:

Original Post by dplatzer:

I don't necessarily have sex with them, but there is definitely a sexual aspect to things.  The most recent one I've been on 5 dates with, and he slept over my apt last weekend, things seemed good (there was not sex, but...ahem use your imagination) and since then I've barely heard a word from him.  I got a "hey, whats up" text on Tuesday night, which I followed up by inviting him to my run group on Wednesday, followed up by "I have a company outing at the game (red sox). but I would like to." THATS IT.  seriously? out of nowhere.  whereas before he was setting up the next date at the end of the night, following up the next day. 

ughhhh.

 Seems like he gave a fairly reasonable response. What did you text back?

I said "oh cool have fun". and I haven't heard from him since.  This is just a completely typical scenario of it.

 Perhaps you simply gave up too soon.

1. It's texting - not an ideal form of communication at best.

2. The fact that he said 'I would like to' after his explanation leads me to believe he means it. You could have said - 'cool. have fun. lemme know if you want to do something later in the week.' then the ball's in his court, and if he doesn't hit it back, you know you're done.

Next time - maybe pursue a little further before giving up. Men don't have any idea how you feel or what you want unless you give them a hint, you know?

 

If you really are starting to worry about how you're presenting: do what Hata said.

I think I like this idea of testing, but I don't think any of the previous ones will work.  If/when things fail with the current dude I will maybe ask him.  I am scared to hear though! I really can't think of any real reason!

hmm, this is a tuffie.  They are actually pretty different.  Trader Joe's does have a private label, actually ALMOST all of their stuff is private label.  Also, most of it is pre-made or frozen stuff.  Their produce is not anything exceptional.  But I do love it there, here are my favs:

-their private label yogurts. OMG. their nonfat vanilla greek is my favorite yogurt of all time.  it has specks of vanilla bean in it. nuff said.  also the pomegranite greek is good too and not overly sweet like most yogurts.  the coffeehouse line of yogurts are fab too.

-the berry berry granola on top of the vanilla greek yogurt is perfection.

-their soups that come in the box, esp the low sodium roasted tomato red pepper are great!

-the fat free chocolate meringue cookies are good, and 13 = 120 cals. not bad! I usually eat 1/2 serving.

-great hummus! the edamame hummus is great too!

-snackie things.  they make a version of popchips, of bagel chips, and mostly any kind of healthy chips that are all really great!

-the pulled bbq chicken in the fridge section is awesome for salads.

Truthfully I mostly buy their frozen stuff which would be no good for you. but its a great store!

That is so great that you are motivated to run!  I love it because you can do it ANYWHERE so you will never be thrown out of your routine!  I actually <3 running new places, it is so interesting! Anyhow, I think the other posters gave you some great tips.  I will add a few things.

- I started running in high school after quitting soccer and not wanting to get fat.  its not easy at first!  being 16, and athletic, my first run was 3 miles and it took a loooong time lol!  first one mile race I finished in 6:59, and was so happy I peed my pants- literally!  by the end of the season though I got down to 5:30 miles! you will get there, but take things slowly! The run/walk combo is great for starting!

- the nike+ stinks IMHO.  I mean, the basic premises of it is cool, but is off by approx 10%, which adds up quite a bit as your runs get longer.  If you decide to stick with running I highly recommend a garmin but I warn you its like runners crack!

- signing up for local races is a blast, and you could make some new running buddies!  I'd look for things starting maybe a month out from now.  coolrunnings.com lists local races and events.

- a final note about shoes: What everyone said about having the right shoe for you is the most crucial advice.  I always went to this running store in my hometown where they don't even display the shoes.  They watch how your foot/body moves, then bring out 3 pairs for you to try.  This is so you don't just pick what is pretty, but what is good! ANYHOW, I moved this yr, got a new pair of shoes, and nearly got stress fractures from them. this = BAD NEWS for someone training for a marathon.  so yes, be sure your shoes are correct for you!

now go out there and have funn!

Slimby, no matter where you are now (or whenever you get a scale!), ANY effort you can make will help.

I love what you said about pretty-ing yourself up.  On days I wake up feeling fat (lol this also works for a slight hangover) I just put on an outfit I know looks good and play up my eyes.  I like my eyes, so it makes me feel better.  I'm sure you have a feature that others would love, whether its your hair, eyes, hands, whatever! Make sure that thing always looks good!

As for your question about me dropping lbs quickly (I think that was @ me?) it was mostly water weight honestly.  I cleaned up my diet really quickly, cutting out snacky foods and only eating fruits and veggies as snacks.  This past week I am hoping for an additional 2 lbs b/c I've followed the same diet and I've exercised every single day. 

Reetinerbell- thats great you have success breaking down your goals like that, unfortunately I feel that is not good for me :( When I only have 5 lbs to lose I end up throwing caution to the wind, so I am currently tackling the big number, going from that high of 164.5 down to 143.  I hope to be there by Nov when I run my marathon.  We'll see!

ghouroob, if I were you I'd keep eating exactly as you are, and make sure the week of the trip you avoid lots of carbs and anything high in sodium (canned soups, prepackaged meals, and obviously stuff like chinese/mexican).  Try to get in some sort of exercise every day!  Even if you don't lose much weight it will give you a boost of confidence knowing you've done it, and you'll def tone up a bit!  Even if you can't hit a gym try to walk (or run, depending on your fitness) for 30 mins a day, even break it up into 15 mins am/15 pm, if you walk at a brisk pace its about 15 min/mile, so that will be good!  And try doing crunches and bicycle crunches too! good luck :)

1. my blue-green eyes

2. my legs that can carry me 26.2 miles

3. my long torso which keeps my tummy pretty flat even when I gain weight.

Morning Everyone!

I weighed in this morning, and while it is DEF not where I want to be (ahem, 1 lb lighter than where I STARTED in May '08), I am okay with it.  My weight this morning was 161, down from 164.5 last Sunday morning.  I know I didn't really lose 3.5 lbs this week so some of it was prob water weight.  But for the next few weeks I am aiming to lose 2 lbs/week, and after I get back to about 155 (my bodys happy/easy weight) I will likely drop down to 1 lb/week until I reach 143.

My marathon (philly!) is November 22nd.  I know that I will be able to run even faster times if I lighten the load a bit, so that is my inspiration for now!

Okie- glad that your weigh-in went well!  Julz- welcome back, its great that you enjoyed the trip and got your moneys worth!  Now you have a challange for yourself to get back to where you were (I am sure @ your weight you'd look fab even with 5 extra lbs!). Etah, thanks for the encouragement!  Everyone else, have a great weekend, hope you all are doing well.

Danielle