Posts by ebabee

Hi all. I am officially getting off of calorie count because I honestly think it is more triggering than good. I've recently started the Naturally Thin program than Swan has listed above, and I am so much better off with that! Reading these posts triggers me to want to restrict and count calories, and that is the opposite of everything about Naturally Thin. I feel like I'm finally getting on the right track to becoming healthy and when I come on here seeing people eating super low calorie amounts and trying to exercise off every last pound, it makes me question my new way of thinking. Not that I am trying to criticize at all, it just doesn't work for me. I wish you all the best and hope that you can overcome your binging issues in one way or another!

Swan, I'm Airee on NT forum. See you there :)

off87, I also am a 5 foot 2 in female, weigh 110-115 lbs and I would eat 1600 for weight loss, sometimes more. You can get away with alot more calories. I agree with natalina, I wouldn't push it all the way to the limit as far as weight loss goes. Sure, you CAN safely lose 1.7 lbs a week, but that doesn't mean you have too. If you can eat more and lose it more slowly and stop the binging, wouldn't you rather do that? I don't know but I would haha. Good job though glad you are enjoying your weekend!

laura, I have that issue on the weekends too sometimes. Some weekend days I have nowhere I have to be, and I just don't know what to do with myself which definitely makes it harder not to binge. Cleaning and homework are good options although sometimes homework makes me want to eat haha. Some other things I like to do: go window shopping-or real shopping but I have no money haha, puzzles seem to really keep me amused for awhile for some reason, call a friend or relative you haven't talked to in awhile-won't want to be chopping in their ear on the phone, read magazines, start a project-I plan on making a collage out of magazine pages for my room this weekend when I get bored, take a nap, watch a movie......I hope some of these help you!

natalina-Glad you started your weekend off on a good note! Good luck for the rest of the weekend!

I went out and drank last night, and woke up STARVING this morning. I was craving dinner-type food this morning, so I just went with it, and now I am satisfied so I am proud of myself! Its a gorgeous day, I can't wait to go for my run. I just realized I actually made it through Friday! I haven't gone this long without a binge in forever :)

Off, good job staying strong. Do you think you need to eat a little more maybe during the week, you eat about as much as I do to lose weight and I'm a fairly small girl! 1600 is not a lot of calories at all, I feel like if you even bumped it to 2000 you would lose weight and maybe not binging would get easier for you?

Natalina: I'm going to school for physical therapy, so I'm in a neuroscience class right now (I have my first quiz tomorrow I need to get studying! Haha) Its very interesting! Anyway, you may have learned this, but our brains start to make connections from the decisions that we choose, and once we do something over and over again (in all of our case-binging) our brain becomes wired to binge once we hit our trigger-everyone is different in this area I think. The good thing is, that by choosing not binge, we are rewiring our brain to get used to making that decision instead. So eventually, it should become automatic (just like our binging is now) for us not to binge after we choose not to over and over again. That brings me alot of hope for some reason haha.

Ok, so I've done pretty well this week, not perfect by any means, but I'm making progress. I took off exercising Tuesday and today, and they both happened to be the days in which I ate the most. I didn't eat enough early in the day today which lead to me being overly hungry once I got home from class. I chowed down on some pasta and chicken and broccoli and had a couple pieces of candy and relaxed. A little while later I felt hungry and ended up eating a small cookie, 2 big bites of cheese on a little cracker, a 60 cal jello mousse pudding cup with a few pretzels, the 1/2 pb j I brought for lunch that I never ate, a granola bar, another little cookie and a few hershey kisses. I was craving ice cream, so I just decided to go get some. I bought a quart of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream, made myself a cone, and here I sit. I said to myself "You can have your ice cream, but then you have to be done." And I actually did it. At first I was sad when my ice cream cone was finished but shortl after I felt satisfied and proud that I didn't just come home and scarf down a pint. So now I'm full, but also content. My mind isn't craving anymore and my stomach isn't nagging at me, which feels nice. I had a total of ~2400 calories today, so I don't think I'm going to consider it a binge. I had ~2500 calories on Tuesday, but I pretty much just stopped when I got full on Tuesday.

I don't know if these are binges, but they are considerably smaller. I will take 2 high calorie days like this any day over massive binges. I didn't eat enough yesterday which is what I think caused me to eat so much today. I'm not too worried about it though because I have alot of time to work out tomorrow, so I plan on burning most of the extra calories off then anyway. But I'm not going to try to overcompensate and burn off every excess calorie because that just leads me to more binging. I have been doing really bad with making sure I eat regular meals and trying to restrict during the day, which is my biggest problem right now. I think "Oh I'll just eat my apple for lunch today I'm fine" and then end up overeating like this later...I should know better. Its ok though. I'm learning!

I have decided that I am not going to count these days as binges. That was merely overeating. 2200-2300 is my maintenance some days if not more, so its really not a huge deal if I eat a couple hundred calories over that sometimes, especially while I'm trying to cure the binging.

If I make it through tomorrow, that will be one week, no binges for me then! I've had more like 1/2 binges, Idk. But its not about being black or white, which is what got me into this mess in the first place. I will be so excited if I can just go out over the weekend without having a binge hanging over my head! that would be so awesome! I think I might lift tonight since I just walked around today to get my metabolism going.

Sorry for the enormous post, its been awhile!

Edit: Also Natalina-2200 calories is most definitely NOT a binge, especially for you considering how young you are and that you are active! Your metabolism should have no problem with that! I find that sometimes having those higher calorie days saves me from having massive binges!

Hey you are already half way to correcting your problem because you realize that because you are cutting your calories too much one day, you are binging the next, so that's great! 

As a fellow binger (ha), I know exactly how you feel. I've been really doing my best lately to try and not punish myself after I binge, and I have cut down my binges drastically, down to about once a week now compared to 2-3 times a week. The hardest part for me is to not get discouraged. I'm trying to lose ~5-10 lbs., and its just really frustrating right now. I know that if I cut my calories too much I'll end up binging but currently I almost feel like I'm not cutting enough. Last night I half binged, totally myself to ~2500 calories for the day, but I wasn't stuffed, and it was only about 500 calories over my maintenance. Anyway, I should have been proud of myself for stopping there, but instead I felt so guilty this morning, my first instinct was to barely eat until dinner today. My pants felt tight in the morning which is what started this, but I should have just relaxed, I'm pretty sure I was just holding onto water from eating extra yesterday because my pants felt fine as the day went on. I seriously almost cried this morning getting ready because my butt looked so big in the mirror! But REAL, lasting weight loss is SLOW.

Ok sorry I went on a rant about myself but I wanted you to know that you aren't the only one, I can totally relate. Definitely do your best to eat enough after you binge though, once you can break that part of the cycle your binges will stop too. It has nothing to do with your self control, you're poor body thinks it is starving and literally takes over forcing you to binge. You can do this though!

Original Post by off87:

Well I typically go by calories per week. So if you ate 1500 for six days then on the seventh binged on 4,000 that averages the week to 1,942 calories even. So you won't get fat averaging that many calories per week, no way. Now if you ate 4,000 everyday that would be different. I know us bingers have an intense fear of fat gain but if you are binging once or even twice a week while keeping a calorie deficit throughout the other five or six days, fat gain is unlikely, or will take a long time to gain at least. When the scale goes up it is not because of fat per say, it's because of all that food in our system, water retention, and so on. Unfortunately it's very hard to get an accurate weight if you're binging weekly as the binge weight can take a week or more to lose, so I think most of us really have no clue what our true weight is.

BTW, I did the "unbelievable" today. I stopped binging while I was binging for the first time in the history of my binges. Confusing I know but read on. I went to the store and bought two pints of Ben and Jerry's chocolate chip cookie dough, legal crack for someone like me. I also bought some white chocolate truffles for $7.99 (I know, I know..). Well, first I downed one pint. Well I began on the second pint, I took one bite, and was enjoying it SO much. But I did something very disgusting yet amazing that made me stop binging. I looked in the bathroom mirror as I ate. I could not down another spoonful or even open the box of truffles, I was disgusted. I went outside and threw a FULL pint of chocolate chip cookie dough and a whole box of unopened $7.99 white chocolate truffles in the garbage. It was so painful to watch myself eat like this it made me realize I need to stop which I did. So next time you binge make the step to go look at yourself, you may be surprised!!! So I would like to celebrate success today again, though I managed to down a ton of pizza, I managed to stop binging while I was binging.

 This is very true. I have lost weight binging 2 times a week before, but I was exercising more then. I would rather exercise less and binge less like I am now :).

Off, great job stopping yourself mid binge that is hard to do. I've done it before, and I usually end up squirting something gross on what I'm eating, like hand sanitizer to make it no longer appetizing.

Natalina-I had a similar experience as you today. I went to the tailgate and had about 3 drinks, came home late afternoon to a counter full of brownies! However, I found that it literally wasn't even hard to resist them. I easy stood at the counter right next to them making myself a big salad for dinner. I was so happy. Sweets are usually my weakness.

I got up early and ran with my roommate today and we ran pretty fast for an hour so I got a great workout in. Made me feel great. I walked alot at the tailgate this afternoon. I ate a little more than I meant to in one sitting when I came home, but it was all good stuff, a big salad, rice cakes and some cheese and few bites of pretzels and crackers. No big deal. I don't know if I should if I should go out tonight again. I just don't feel like I need the extra calories although I'll probably dance plenty of them off if I go.

I feel so determined. I know this is going to take time, I have decided that if I can stop binging by Decemberish, that would be great. This has been going on over years, so its going to take awhile to break the habit. I'm in neurscience right now, and it just really makes me think about how this can totally be stopped and why its so difficult to stop. We need to rewire our brains out of the habit. But wth practice and by not binging, we are making progress. Ok enough rambling haha.

Enjoy the weekend all!

Well I just went on a throwing away rampage haha. I pitched pretty much everything I had left that will be tempting for me to binge on in the future-rest of my dark chocolate kisses, tortilla chips (which I've had in here for about a month and have done ok with, but I have binged on them in the past), animal crackers (I've been taken random bites of these all the time when I know I don't need them and today I ate a ton of them) and the rest of the forzen yogurt that was left over. I would have thrown out the jar of peanut butter but me and my one roommate are sharing it, and I need it for my lunches sometimes. It felt really good to throw all of this stuff out though. I know its stupid, but it felt liberating being able to get rid of it.

I have decided to not run today, maybe go for a walk if I want, and just clean and do laundry (which requires a few flights of stairs) and lift later tonight when I'm feeling better. I'm definitely going to get up early tomorrow morning and get a run in because I'll be able to run well by then (as compared to if I go now) and it will motivate me to continue to make choices throughout the rest of my day. I plan on drinking as little as possible tomorrow because I'm just fed up from today and don't really even want to now. Thats what makes me the most mad about this problem. It interferes so much with my life and I hate that. It isn't fair. I should be able to go tomorrow and not have this on my mind. I'm sure I'll still have a good time and everything but still it just sucks.

buttons-I know how you feel about calorie counting. I honestly don't know if it is good or bad for me. On one hand, I like it because it makes me feel safe. I can calculate a specific amount and know I will either maintain my weight or lose it and that I need to burn a little extra if I eat a little extra. However, I also think it might trigger my binges by making me a little too crazy about what I eat. Like I said, I didn't feel like I was eating too few calories all week but today stemmed from pure hunger. Everytime I try to not count calories, I, like you, find myself doing it again! I've tried to stop going on this website before and then I come back for more! Haha. Idk. Maybe I'll try to do a food diary without calories too. I overestimate sometimes I think too. Like I would rather be over by x calories than under and gain weight. That might be a problem too but I refuse to use a food scale or anything like that because I don't want to get any more obsessive about all of this than I already am!

So many people have this problem in one way or another. My roommate ate almost an entire bag of cheese puffs and finished off what was left of her pint of ice cream the other night while we were watching tv, after eating plenty all day. She's overweight, she eats all packaged crap foods, but still. It seems like most people have this problem in one way or another.

Ok I'm done now haha, have a nice weekend everyone, stay strong!

coffee and 1/2 huge apple
everything bagel w/ cream cheese
taco salad w/ chicken, greek yogurt mixed with taco mix, salsa, cheese and lettuce and tortilla chips
dark chocolate hershey kisses

healthy........;)

I believe that they have discovered that metabolisms (not including those with metabolic disorders) actually don't vary that much from person to person. I think its funny because we always ask "How can one stay thin while eating whatever they want?" I think defining "Whatever thy want" is important here. When you are not depriving yourself, you will have no need to shovel in loads of junk food and will probably be able to eat that moderately. Also, if train yourself to eat real foods, you will "want" those. So you could reasonably stay thin by "eating whatever you want".

Also, a lot of people that act like they are naturally thin and can eat like a horse are putting on a facade. I have a friend like this, she acts like she doesn't have to worry about what she eats, but I lived with her last year, so I got to see what was really going on. Truth is, she eats around 1200 calories a day alot of the time, even sometimes less. She eats some junk but rarely have I ever seen her overeat. 2000 calories would be alot for her. I think alot of it is about perspective. I have an aunt that appears to be naturally thin and she doesn't eat past 2-3 o'clock in the afternoon. People do all sorts of weird s*** lol that we just don't see. She has a huge lunch at work, so I bet her colleagues think she just eats whatever and stay skinny.

My mom is also naturally thin. She is very active, does a little formal exercise, but she's always doing something. She doesn't count calories, only weighs herself maybe twice a month, and also thoroughly enjoys herself at parties and on holidays. She tries to mostly healthy things, but doesn't take it to any extreme. I think she's got weight maintenance down better than anyone I know. When she feels like she's gained a few, she just cuts back her portions a bit until she feels back to normal. I'm working towards being like her :)

You are right in all of your thinking, minus that you need to lose weight. I have/am struggling with binging behavior now, I've never had full on bulemia, but I used to overexercise to compensate for my binges and not enough the next few days. In my experience with this, I agree with reinewen, I don't think you should be focusing on losing weight just yet. You're by no means overweight, and there is plenty of time for that. I would first focus on being healthy. I run about the same amount as you, although I've kinda been decreasing it lately, but you need to eat more. I'm 5'2 and around 115 lbs and can maintain my weight on over 2000 calories a day, so you can definitely eat over 2000 for maintenance.

Don't be afraid, just do it! Make them good quality calories, you'll feel better both physically and mentally!

Thanks laura and off. I have decided that I am definitely going to cut out the sugary treats for awhile. I need to get back in control.

I actually had a bit of a revelation today. All this time, I kept thinking my problem was my binging. But binging is more a result of the real problem, which is that I'm never satisfied with myself. Even when I have weighed slightly less, I'm not any happier. I still think I need to lose more.

How often should I weigh myself now that I'm just trying to maintain? I was thinking maybe once a week? I don't want to be obsessive, but its still important to be aware I think.

lauracass, I think I am able to eat closest to maintenance without binging when I don't count calories. I think I get freaked out when I see I have eaten 2000 calories and think "That has to be too much" even though its perfectly fine.

I find that snacking also triggers me. Not so much snacking on veggies or a piece of fruit, but crackers, etc. between meals makes me want to keep eating. I'm planning on pretty much eating 3 meals a day, and only having fruit, veggies, cheese, lean meats if I really need a snack.

I never have thrown up from a binge which is good, but if I had I probably would consider therapy more. Not that it makes that much of a difference I guess, but I just wouldn't want to cross over into bulemia territory.

What do you guys do after a binge? I feel like a lazy a**, I don't want to go out because I'm not in the mood to drink, so I'm left to go on the computer, paint my nails, watch tv, etc, and I feel guilty just sitting around after eating so much you know? Its 9 pm so its too late for a walk here-I'm kind of in the city so that wouldn't be smart, Idk. I didn't really feel like exercising today, but I feel guilty. Again part of the problem. I'm considering having a cup of tea, my stomach is feeling better but tea is always soothing and good digestion. Also, I'm going to be tempted to exercise extra tomorrow, but that's not really smart right? I've read that you shouldn't really compensate after a binge because it just perpetuates the cycle. Easier said than done.