My name is Jacqi, and I started my weight loss project weighing in at 205 pound, 3 years ago. As I am only 5'2", and have a small to medium frame, this weight was a really bad fit for me. I couldn't buy clothes at any "normal" stores in the mall, which is of concern to a 20 year old. I was a size 22 and just felt plain uncomfortable at that weight. Throughout my childhood I was skinny, as a young adult always about 10-20 pounds overweight. When I started cooking my own meals, that's when the problems really began. I packed on a lot of weight living on my own and never, EVER working out in any way. I ate lots o' carbs, primarily sandwiches on low fiber bread, pizza, pasta, and ice cream. Starch at every meal.

 I had a few turning points that made me realize I needed to start watching my weight. The first had already happened a few years before when my grandma died. She was only 54 years old, but had been very overweight her whole adult life. She struggled with diabetes, heart problems, blood clots in her legs, and asthma. She died of congestive heart failure. I wonder what would have happened if she had lived to see all the information available now on weight loss, etc. I was very close to her and I wish she was alive to see my daughter. So, being around to see my great grandchildren is definitely important to me.

My second wake up call was when I went skiing for my birthday in New Mexico. I couldn't even pretend to keep up with my dad, and felt totally winded and humiliated. I didn't even recognize myself in the pictures.

And then I got a ticket, and the cop wrote down that I was 200 pounds. I was mortified!!! I didn't feel that heavy but, according to the cop and the scale, I was! Something about having a stranger guess my weight made it a little realer to me. Nobody else around me told me I was getting heavy.

At the time, I worked at Whole Foods Market in Plano, so I already had a good starting place. Many people at work were trying South Beach, so I joined in. The others were not as big as I was, so I didn't know how well I would do. Prior to this attempt, I had never tried seriously for very long to lose weight. I would have considered myself someone with absolutely no will power.

I cut out carbs for a few weeks, and did a very short pilates workout a few times a week. I had read somewhere that once you do something for 30 days it becomes a habit so I focused on consistency. Before I knew it, I'd dropped around 30 pounds. I felt great, and everyone noticed the change.

Soon I was eating fruit and being more permissive with the amount of fat I ate. I worked out harder, buying exercise dvds and walking a lot. I did pilates, yoga, strength training, tae bo, whatever I could find! After six months I was down to 145.

And then I got pregnant! During my pregnancy, I stopped working out and ate less restrictively. In fact, I all but quit trying to eat healthy (I know, I should have maintained my eating habits, just increased my calories, for the baby!). I walked occasionally, but didn't do any pregnancy exercises. I didn't even put cocoa butter on my belly. I guess I kind of went into a euphoric type state where I felt all was right with the world, and I didn't need to try so hard anymore. When I gave birth I was 190 pounds. I am sooo grateful I lost weight when I did cuz I could have been approaching 300, had I not intervened.

Very soon after having my daughter in September of 2005, I started my regimen again. It was much easier because I knew what to do now, and I joined a gym. I hit a stalemate at 150, and pretty much just hung out there for awhile, not trying very hard to lose.

When I started my new job this year at a cafe, I weighed around 145 again. I had lost a lot of muscle tone, and wasn't eating very healthfully. The cafe didn't help! I ate cookies, popovers, sandwiches on white ciabatta, QUICHE (my nemesis), cheesecake...you name it! My skinny boss encouraged me  to try all the product, and to nosh with her when we got bored at work. Soon I was 154, and went into panic mode! I was afraid I would get back up to where I used to be if I continued as I was.

So, since May I've been ultra-committed to improving my body and health. Besides all the junk at work, there are healthful salads, hearty soups, and whole wheat bread available all the time. I have been focusing on a few new strategies:

1.) I am eating more fruits and vegetables than I EVER thought I would. I try to have fruit with breakfast, for snacks and for dessert. I eat salads every night with dinner, and a lot of times for lunch too.

2.) I am eating a lot more protein. I eat eggs in the morning, grilled chicken breast for snack and on my salads, almonds or macadamia nuts. I consciously try to add extra protein to all my meals.

3.) I'm focusing more on cardio, less on strength training (I feel I was going a bit heavy with it the first time around, my arms look much nicer now!). I also do a lot more yoga/pilates than I did before.

4.) I'm keeping a steady food journal, which really helps me sort out my trends and habits to make new goals.

Today, I weigh 122 pounds. It feels weird to even say that! I am kind of anxious to be at this weight, because I don't know where to go from here.  I wish I could say I was happy, but of COURSE I'm not. I'm worried that I'm getting a little too thin. I always look like I weight less than what I do, so people think I am 110, 105. I worry that I'm not eating enough to maintain my lean muscle mass. I wish I had an in-home nutritionist and trainer, despite all the knowledge I've gleaned from my research. I still have a hard time counting calories, cuz I detest it. I am afraid of weighing less than 120, because I never have and (have you ever read 'Thinner' by Stephen King? lol) I'm afraid I won't stop losing. Also, my boobs have SHRUNK and now seem more saggy than ever! I'm a 34 C when I used to be a DD cup. I bought some jeans the other day-- size 29!

So, although I am happy and proud of my success, it is a little strange to be at the end of this long, lifechanging journey. I feel like I've been on the road so long, what the heck will I do when I reach my destination? I am considering becoming a personal trainer to help others learn to love exercise, as I now do. I guess now all I have to do is reduce my bodyfat, and learn to really enjoy being this size.

 I love this website already, and can tell I will be able to find others who share my concerns and my new goals!