"You can't lose weight by talking about it. You have to keep your mouth shut." ~Author Unknown

What Got Me Here: While I was watching a weight loss show (that will remain nameless), they showed a man who was going to get surgery. This man had never worked out, ate constantly, and was very, very large. This surgery was to save his life. For three days before the surgery, he had to stay on a liquid diet. Water, broths, the works. However, one night, he recorded his self crying because his family was cooking hamburgers...HAMBURGERS!? The horror! Anyway. Now, I don't mean he was sitting around thinking, "Hmm...I'd enjoy one, too bad I can't", he was really upset. Crying, sobbing, saying he wasn't ready to say good bye to food, the works. Watching this, I felt pity and a little disgusted. I thought, in all of my open mindedness, "It's just food. Get over it!" Then another thought hit me. "How am I any different?" I used to eat like I was a starving day laborer all the time and then complain about my weight mid-bite. Right then and there, I said I quit. I quit being that fat girl, that fat friend, that statistic. I quit.

My Weakness: Soda. Sweet, sweet, fizzy goodness. That, and I often feel confined to a diet and lash out. This time around, I'm eating "normally," I'm just responsible for it.

My goal?: 187. It's a lot. A hell of a lot. But I'll be alive for this time regardless, so I might as well live each day a little thinner, right? I'm not going to beat myself up for letting me get this way anymore, now, that's the gym's job. Also, in 2010, I'm going to Japan, the land of the thin. If I go there at this weight...I'll be miserable. I can't ruin this trip for me. So help a sista' out.

Goals & Rewards:

10 Pounds: Death Jr. DS Game

                 Bought this. <3

20 Pounds: Stuffed Animal

                 It's so cute~ I love it.

30 Pounds: Smiles

                 :)

40 Pounds: A new backpack. It's pretty, and nice and I want it~

                 It was very much awesome. <3 I like it. It's like a badge of honor.

50 Pounds: Smiles

                 :)

60 Pounds: PSP

                 These things are hella expensive. I don't know when I'm ever getting one. <.<

70 Pounds: More Smiles.

                 I feel like the journey from 60 to 70 took forever~ But now I've got 80's in my sights and I'm not letting it get away! Watch your back, 80's!

80 Pounds: Smiles

                I'm just barely in the 260's. Let's hope it stays.

90 Pounds: More Smiles

                  Okay...259...I don't know if this is real or what...but I want to keep moving forward...I WILL get to 100.

100 Pounds: I. Want. A. Pillow. Pet...NOW

I'm going to leave it there for now, until I get to 100. I don't want to get overwhelmed after all.

"Don't dig your grave with your own knife and fork." ~English Proverb