Posts by lboglioli

Thank you so much for the advice! it definitely is for life and there are so many obstacles, this one was not bad at all! I keep thinking the same thing about if I hadnt stopped where would I be? but I cant go back, so all I can do is start over :) we can do this!

I was just thinking the same thing 60's?  wtf!

Thanks for the advice. I have an "apple" shaped body and carry a lot of fat in my waist area. I want to lower my body fat overall because I can see the muscles ive developed underneath and the unnesescary fat left over from my heavier days sitting on top of it. I think I have come to the realization that running is great but strenth training will help me build muscle and lose some of that pesky fat as well. Thanks again for the insight! I really dont care what the number on the scale is as long as my body looks the way I would like. which is at a healthy weight with defined muscles.

Original Post by fade_the_great:

I graduated high school weighing 128 lbs. Now (six years later) I weigh 105 lbs. I've definitely experienced some major changes in how society treats me. Before, men looked right through me as if I didn't exist - and I wasn't even overweight to begin with! Now, I can't walk into a store without having at least one guy hold the door open for me and offer me his telephone number. It's not just the men who have changed, either. Women smile at me more often and give me more compliments on my clothes, hair, etc. My fashion sense didn't change during my weight loss process. Neither did my personality. All that changed was my weight, but for the first time I was seen as this amazing person that everyone wanted to associate themselves with.

The guys who hit on me now are the same guys who bullied me in high school for being chubby. Naturally, I have mixed feelings when someone compliments my weight loss. The underlying message seems to be "I accept you now because you have conformed to society's standards."

I spend my weekends holding a sign for a pet store. Sometimes I wear makeup. Sometimes I don't. You could call it a layman's social experiment. When I don't wear any makeup, strangers roll down their car windows to tell me that I'm ugly and they wouldn't **** me for a million dollars. When I do wear makeup, creepy homeless guys put their arms around me and tell me all the ways they'd love to **** me. I consider both of these experiences psychologically damaging because they reinforce the idea that a woman's worth is based on her appearance alone. 

As much as I hate to say it, society treats you better when you conform to its superficial standards.

 

its unbelieveable how spot on this is for me. I too had a public job for a while and on days I didnt want to get hit on, I would purposely wear sweats or unflattering clothes and no makeup what so ever... some customers thought I was a different person. its insane the way people will treat you based on appearance alone.

on the subject of conforming to society ... I also agree. I had a lot of enemys in highschool and so did many of my friends. Now that we have all grown up and matured a bit we have all gotten our fair share of appologies. the thing is I accept them but I know in my heart I dont give a f*** what they say. I know they are appologizing because I dress and look differently now, not because they genuinely feel bad. for some reason my other friends dont seem to get this, and were actually exited to try and befriend them.

I moved out early when I was 18. my parents house was small, dirty and tumultous. on top of that my boyfriend had been kicked out and he was staying with us. I love my family more than anything, but I felt I needed out. I used all my savings at the time and my boyfriend and I were both working. The first year was really hard. we didnt realize how much stuff you actually have to buy to live. food, laundry detergent, toilet paper, clothes... pretty much anything you have used throughout your life, you will be buying it.. and it adds up fast.

on top of having to buy everything, you will have to take care of your home. When I first moved out I avoided cleaning and well it got bad. if your parents are the type who do your laundry or move your dishes from the sink to the dishwasher... those little things actually build up into a big mess if nobody is there to do it for you!

You may have to up the hours at work to cover expenses. you may also have to spend less time going out and having fun because you will have more responsibilities now. Sure you can skip cleaning the house on one of your days off to party with friends, but will it really seem worth it when you have to go back to work for the next five days and have to keep looking at the mess because you dont have much time aside from work to clean up?

Bills will also be rough. if you want internet and tv be prepared to shell out at least 75 a month. You will also pretty much have to pay for the basic things such as water, electricity, garbage, maybe even propane depending on where you move into. some places include these things ( usually apartments or condos.) it might not seem like a lot at first. but when you go outside to check the mail and have five bills... well it can get a bit stressful! Aside from all the expenses, you need to be very truthful with yourself. it might seem like an okay idea if you make enough money at work to just scrape by on your own, but its not an educated decision. I am speaking from experience. get a place that you can afford with money left over to cover your ass if something happens or if you feel like going out and having fun :)

I would definitely suggest looking for somewhere to live not far from home. I moved about 50 miles north of my parents and its been nice to have them close enough to help out, but far enough to gain independence. It will also make it so you can look for jobs prior to moving.

wherever you chose to move, you will have to find the actual home. that can take some effort. I think I looked at over ten apartments and condos before finding the one we decided on ( and I wish we had looked even more and been a bit pickier.) When you look for a place, if it is in a new town you should really spend a day there feeling the place out. it is easy to overlook the flaws of some houses and neighborhoods when you are so exited to move. be truthful with yourself.

overall, moving out is a great adventure. but if you do not plan correctly or put enough thought into what it actually entails then it can get stressful. If you can stand to live at your parents house for a little while longer it could be very beneficial. it would give you some time to start saving for when you move out and looking for potential places that are a perfect fit for you.

not sure about your situation with work, or school. but if your current job is low pay you need to take that into account. I moved out with one year of college classes and a high school diploma... hello minimum wage or not far from it. If you have a local community college near your parents house you may want to check if they have any short certificate programs you are interested in. this way you will always have that as a fall back.

The experience for me has been amazing for personal growth. yes there have been many struggles and I have had to let go of some things. I have grown up and come into my own in ways my friends back at their parents house cant even begin to comprehend. I would not trade this experience for the world. although I do miss my family dearly and wish I could spend more time with them, I know this has taught me so many valuable lessons that I would not have learned otherwise.

sorry for the extreme rambling, I just learned a lot through moving out early and if I can teach one person anything or put something into perspective for someone then I am happy.

Original Post by crazigerl:

Obviously the people who wronged you mean a lot to you. Good for you for getting through it and not to quit your workout to boot. I hope you can work through it and simplify your life of people who don't always treat you with respect.

She is so right, simplify. if something in your life makes you have bad feelings- rid your life of it. I also have done the same thing when I was very frusterated! I put it all into the workout and felt much better afterward. working out is such a great tool to relieve stress

This is one of the most beautiful things I have ever read. I too like many others was brought to tears. I am so happy for you and so proud of you. Our stories may be quite different, but they are also very similar. I have had depression for more of my life than not. I also grew up living off of processed foods and after I moved out on my own, began to basically life off of fast food. I would feel so depressed some days I would just sit on the couch and watch tv all day long while eating junk. I would be too embarassed of myself to go into a store so I would chose the drive through- and the cycle continued. My pants seemed to be getting tighter and tighter. I would wake up feeling more tired than when I went to bed. I didnt want to see my friends or family because I was embarassed of how they would think of me. Then one day out of nowhere, it just clicked! I started logging my foods and now Im hooked! its been a littl e over six weeks and the fog of my depression has almost evaporated. I still dont feel completely back to "normal" but I am amazed by how just changing what I put in my body and seeing the results has lifted my spirits so much.

I will never forget your story as long as I live ( ive got the mind of a steel trap so that helps.) Congrats on how far you have come and I cant wait to see your journey continue! Thank you so much for posting this. I think a lot of peoples views have changed after reading this, I know mine has.

Original Post by raychelc:

Mom got pregnant with me in Iran, then made a rather sudden move here to the states. My father was American with an English background (his grandparents).

Anyway, I was born in San Francisco, and lived in Northern California until about 14 years old, which is when Mom decided to move us to the suburbs near Los Angeles, and so here I am still.

 

I was born in SF too!! this is such a cool thread! california represent!

Original Post by happybananas:

ARGGG! I think I have hit a plateau :( 4 days, no budge in weight! Not TOM. So frustrated. I have been strict with what I eat and feel like it's all a waste of time.

 

I have lost 9 pounds down from 183 pounds to 174 pounds but I want to lose another 34 pounds. I feel it is too early to hit a weight freeze??

 

Any advice on getting over this plateau guys????

try switching up your workout routine a little bit, that always helps me! Also make sure you are drinking lots of water and not eating too much sodium. I notice my weight loss is much faster without those bloated days from salt. good luck hope this helps! you can break through it!!!!

I am so in!!! I have lost my first ten pounds but I have ten more to go before summer! not feeling as motivated as I was a few weeks ago so I know this will help majorly! WE CAN ALL DO THIS!! OUR GOALS ARE CLOSER THAN WE THINK

stats:

female 20- turning 21 tomorrow :D!!!!

height 5'5"

weight 125

goal weight by july 20th 115

first ten pounds just slid right off my body after I stopped stuffing my face with junk food like there was no tomorrow. Exercise also helped a lot too. now im almost to 30 days and my fridge has been lacking in the past two weeks so ive been slowly eating more garbage food. I am exited to get back the drive I had when I first started this website!! I know I havent really fallen off the horse but if im not trying as hard as I know I can something doesnt feel right to me. Super exited for this challenge!