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|Up a bit
Entry on May 27 2012 13:58
|Scales going in right direction
Entry on May 26 2012 18:36
|Stress of adult children
Entry on May 23 2012 12:05
|I am going strong
Entry on May 21 2012 12:51
|Why do I self sabotage myself?
Entry on May 04 2012 13:50
I will add a few things on here but please feel free to check out my diary stated above.
I had my first child at 16 which started the weight gaining. I weighed 98 pounds but slowly started gaining the weight. I was in a abusive marriage and in Aug of 2000 I decided it was time to start losing the weight. At this time I weight 323...but I had to do this behind my husband (at the time) back. If he knew I was dieting then he would beat the crap out of me thinking I was doing it to find someone else. So a month into the diet he started noticing the weight lost and I got away with it by saying it was due to medical reasons...which at the time I was off work due to medical problems. If you read my diary you will understand alot more but I was also suffering from depression severely. I was unhappy about my weight and my marriage and also from some things in my past. But anyways I was searching the internet for people that I could turn to for help with my depression cause I could not go get any professional help because of my husband. One night I found the love of my life who gave me the courage to leave this man who I was with and start a new life. This man saved my life becuase that night I was planning on ending my life. Well anyways to get on with this....I continued to lose weight, I was eating healthier. I was in a womens abuse shelter and getting therapy. I had lost a total 93 pounds. The guy I met on internet and I was still chatting online and phone. One day he called me and said he wanted to meet with me. At this time I was living in Texas and he lived in Montreal Quebec. I was moving back to my home state of Indiana and we agreed thats where we would meet. We have been together since the day we met online Sept 25th 2000. We married Sept 25th 2001. Now I am telling all this for a reason. When I had gotten to Indiana my purse was stolen with all the money I owned in that purse. I had already paid for the rooms for my two sons and a room for me for two weeks. When Dan the gentleman I was to meet got in he also used what he had to buy the food we would need. But after the two weeks we were stuck with no where to go. My oldest boy was on disability but we were not able to get his money because of a mix up so for a couple weeks we was with out a place to live. Dan could of returned to his home in Canada but he remained homeless with us. Within a week we had gotten a motel to stay in. But with just little money our food was scarce and I went out looking for work. Dan couldn't work since he was not a legal citizen. My oldest son of course couldn't and I had a son that was age 17 also and he put in a few applications. So for six months we lived off of 135 dollars a month for 4 people to eat. We ate 1 meal aday and had to be easy things as we had a microwave,electric skillet and a motel refridgerator (very small). But in the beginning of October I got a job. At a fast food in the mall. So the reason I told all this was so I could say this....being limited to what we could eat for that long period of time and now being able to eat better caused me to put the weight on...I think deep down maybe I was afraid of beng in that position again so I started over eating. Times we were low on food I would leave it to my boys. I would go with out eating anything just so they would have something if they got hungry. Now I have put on alot of the weight back on almost all except about 25 pounds. SO now I am here and I am ready to begin this because now I have my family including my new husband of almost 9 years and people on here to help me through this. I can do this!!
Since Sept of 2009 I have been in a plateau but I am now back to losing. I actually lost to 257.9 at one point in Sept but only had 1 reading at 257.9 but I could not get that reading again.It stayed at 258.4 for a while. Then the holidays hit I slowly crept up on scales. In January I knew I better get a hold of this or I would have to lose everything I had already lost all over again. So January 22 I started again at 269.9 and as of Feb 25th 2010 I hit 257.4 I will continue to move forward. I am woman here me ROAR!!
****NEW UPDATE**** I am back up 257.8. I am having a do over. Today is day 1.
|Interests||3: crochet, reading, star war galaxy|
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