So I just realized I get paid to have sex

I start work at 6am every day by waking my boss up (as he's apparently incapable of doing this on his own). Now, we're both attracted to each other but can't actually date because of the inevitable opposition all the other folks at work would have to this (did I mention he's the CEO?). So about once a week we end up having sex after I wake him up, and it just occurred to me that since I'm on the clock starting when I get to his place I'm technically being paid to sleep with him.

So... while this pretty clearly makes the both of us just a touch unethical, I don't feel like I'm a prostitute because I'm enjoying it just as much as him and there's certainly no requirement (spoken or implied) that I do this.

Any thoughts? Should I just take my act to the streetcorner? I figured an anonymous internet forum was the way to go due to the nature of this topic.

rdgatewood, you have a distinct talent for seeing the smaller picture

I don't think all 36 yr olds sleeping with 23 yrs olds are disgusting...so sue me. I also don't think all men are out to objectify women...if that's seeing the smaller picture, so be it.

I also think this is most likely a hypothetical situation that was raised to bring up trouble....but all in fun I suppose :)

it's extremely unwise to boink your boss -- both parties are vulnerable to lawsuit (and the steep fines/awards if you lose) if she's in the U.S. I agree 100%

Original Post by pgeorgian:

i've just been trying to imagine myself hiring a 23 year old man to come over every morning, wake me up, take out the garbage, mow the lawn, and do a few other gender-stereotyped tasks, and once in a while have sex.  could i convince him that he was having fun?  you bet.  would i be using my greater age, experience, earning potential, etc. to exploit him?  yep.

If the he was sleeping with you in a non-bf/gf relationship, some might consider it exploitive for him to charge for the garbage, lawn and wake-up visit. I'd say theyre sexist but remembering 23 yr old guys, question whether they were right.

Kevin Meany - haha!

The boss sounds manipulative because he's convinced you that despite managing to become a CEO, he's incapable of waking himself up.  That or he's just very receptive, anticipating your willingness for a weekly, commitment-free sex romp. 

Are you bragging about your job?

troll

hey, its your life, your an adult, no one is getting hurt, your not doing anything illegal.   I didn't read the entire thread, but I assume you are both single.

If you personally have no issues, I don't see a problem with it. If your questioning yourself, than obviously you have a problem with it.

I have to disagree that he's using his "power" to take advantage of me. I'm the one who initiated the relationship after I had been working for him 7 months. He later admitted he was attracted to me but would never have done anything about it if I hadn't started things, and he's also never been involved with another coworker/employee. He's been completely honest with me about everything and I have no reason to suspect him of lying.

I didn't start this job waking him up and all that (the cooking, cleaning, and secretarial duties were listed in the job description I signed on for, so clearly I was happy getting this type of job). When I was planning my school schedule a couple months ago I found that the classes I needed were only available in the afternoon and I would need to work half my hours early in the morning and half after school. I asked my boss what work I could do at 6am and he suggested waking him up. So it was more that I was already going to be working at that hour - and really, who's gonna complain if they have someone to make them coffee and breakfast in the morning? I'm perfectly fine with this, since while I do have to cook it, I get free breakfast :P

As far as him not respecting me or caring about me, well, we aren't dating so I wouldn't expect the same things from him that I would from a boyfriend. Beyond that, I was recently injured and couldn't work for two weeks. My boss visited me in the hospital just about every day, and when I was laid up at home he drove 60 miles round trip each weekend for no other reason than to hang out (and bring me books). So I don't think I'm just naive and being taken advantage of. Plus he's asked me (with genuine concern) whether I'm okay with what we're doing, and I can tell by the way he acts that 1. If I wasn't okay he wouldn't try to sleep with me, and 2. If I stopped wanting to have sex he may be disappointed but he would certainly not penalize me in any way.

I actually do expect to get a boyfriend at some point, and what's going on with my boss would not prevent that. What I meant by my previous statement was that when I do get said b/f I'll stop everything with my boss. Boss fully expects this to happen and mentioned that he'd be "quietly jealous," but would refrain from doing or saying anything inappropriate at that point. I realize there's a lot of potential for problems, but if I suspected either of us were the lawsuit-happy and/or vindictive type I wouldn't have put myself in this situation.

Inara-  what would happen if you got pregnant?  What would he do?  And, if you were to meet a man; would you quit working?  Or if you cut off the goods; would he fire you?  You're cutting the rest of your life off by sleeping with this person.  B/C obviously he's not looking for something serious; b/c it would have evolved by now.  But since this is your actual employer; who pays you and you count on him for your livelyhood-  then what would happen if your "single" status changed and you met someone?  Lots of factors to consider.  My advice-  go on monster and find another job. 

There's nothing wrong with having a casual relationship that's physical; but there's just more to it here than that.  In order to "break up" with this person; you may loose your job.  And you just never know when and where you'd meet someone.

Great!  You obviously know your boss better than any of us.  You asked for "thoughts."  Many have been given to you.  Since, clearly, none of these things apply to you or to your situation, and since you seem to have it all figured out, and are sure your boss is on the up and up and totally trustworthy, and you are deliriously happy with your job/duties (to the point that you are now becoming defensive and trying to backpeddle/justify/explain), and if you see nothing wrong with what you both are doing (other than being a "touch unethical"), ummm, why'd ya ask? 

Inara you are proving yourself to be more and more naive with every post you make.  Even if I tried to explain further, I don't think you have a chance of understanding. Good luck with it all. At least use protection and have safe sex.

Woah, this is pretty messed up right here.

Incredibly entertaining also.

inara_jade...I'm confused...what's the point of your post? Do you really want people's opinions? cuz you sure are defensive and go to great lengths to explain why what you're doing is ok...

Original Post by rdgatewood:

rdgatewood, you have a distinct talent for seeing the smaller picture

I don't think all 36 yr olds sleeping with 23 yrs olds are disgusting...so sue me. I also don't think all men are out to objectify women...if that's seeing the smaller picture, so be it.

 nope.  you miss the point again. 

I have no problem with 36 year olds sleeping with 23 year olds. I am a little more dodgy with people in positions of power sleeping with their subordinates. Like a professor sleeping with a student or a boss sleeping with his secretary. If you want to bang your boss, get a new job imo. Every place I (or my mother, or my sister or my husband) have worked has rules against that. I think they might be in place for a reason.

I just have to say that this was far more entertaining than anything I could have chosen to watch on TV while I was unwinding before bed.

Thank you and goodnight.

I find this thread thoroughly interesting.

how does his BREATH smell at 6 am?

is the sex good?

and if u arrive at 6:05 am do u still get lucky?

I find this entire situation very pathetic...

Original Post by inara_jade:

I'm the one who initiated the relationship after I had been working for him 7 months. He later admitted he was attracted to me but would never have done anything about it if I hadn't started things, and he's also never been involved with another coworker/employee. He's been completely honest with me about everything and I have no reason to suspect him of lying.

I didn't start this job waking him up and all that (the cooking, cleaning, and secretarial duties were listed in the job description I signed on for, so clearly I was happy getting this type of job). When I was planning my school schedule a couple months ago I found that the classes I needed were only available in the afternoon and I would need to work half my hours early in the morning and half after school. I asked my boss what work I could do at 6am and he suggested waking him up. So it was more that I was already going to be working at that hour - and really, who's gonna complain if they have someone to make them coffee and breakfast in the morning? I'm perfectly fine with this, since while I do have to cook it, I get free breakfast :P

Naive!

Can I wake you in the morning, have sex with you, and then cook your breakfast, all for the same price?

Jeez.....let me think?

Are you on the minimum wage for these services?