Reasons not to purge...

So I just binged..I don't even want to think about the calories, but I know I ate a ridiculous amount of bites of ben and jerrys, chips, toast with jam, wheat thins, and oatmeal....:( I absolutely detest when I binge, I had been so good about avoiding it for so long why did I **** up!!! Aggh. Anyhow, I'm in an extremely ED mindset right now and i KNOW that I shouldn't purge because that is

1)Extremely unhealthy, and messes up my teeth, stomach, esophagus, mind....

2)Encourages more purging later on because I will just imagine that its totally ok for me to purge

3)the only way to get over purging is to NOT do it and just deal with the mental pain of retaining "bad" calories

Anyone agree with what I'm saying? I'm sorry I'm rambling I'm just extremely upset with myself right now and in a lot of emotional pain. NO purging. I'm not going to fall back into that. 

I don't think anyone's going to disagree.    

Personally, I'd suggest not dollying it up by calling it 'purging'...    Makes it sound a rather sanitary and ladylike activity.  When really... 'vomiting'... 'tossing your cookies'... 'shouting Hughie into the great white telephone'... 'a technicolour yawn'...   is a pretty horrible thing that most people try to avoid at all costs.

BTW... you didn't **** up by eating toast jam and oatmeal, etc. so there's no need for 'mental pain', is there?  You just ate more than normal.  Everyone does that.  And you're probably not really a 'cow' as per your username.... why not change that to something more positive?

Words are powerful things!   Turn them in your favour...

i do agree with this , but please dont beat yourself up this is so normal in recovery . what you had didnt look like a binge but even if it was this dosent have to become a habit , youve come so far you can do this . tomorrow is a new day dont beat yourself up , you know exactly what you need to be doing and i truly believe you can do this hang on in there keep battlin things will get there, ive follwed your posts closely your so supportive i so want better things for you h x

Thank you both so much for saying this, I seriously just read these two posts and feel so much better about myself, yes you're right I DID eat a lot but it wasn't like, say a whole pint of ice cream and 10 donuts or something like that. I didn't end up "tossing the cookies" (sounds nice haha) so I'm happy about that :) 

Helen thank you you are always so supportive also I love reading your posts 

PS Gi-jane the "cow" in my name is actually just a nickname I've always had not actually a fat reference as much as it seems like that. Oddly. 

I think i'm going to go eat breakfast now ! ED says RESTRICT but I can't do that to myself anymore. I actually think I feel better today, after eating a lot yesterday I don't feel as weak and cloudy-headed!