Some can recover and some can't?

I recently read something that hinted at this and got me thinking....

In terms of the psychological part of an ED, not the physical part do you think that some people can gain a (nearly) full recovery from an ED.  Of course there's always that teeny bit in there that will never go away, so like a 99% recovery.  And then others will never fully recover, meaning that even if they reach a healthy weight and even if they maintain that for a while they will still have the ED thoughts and have relapses.

I can honestly say that I feel like I'm about 95% recovered and can't imagine EVER going through that again.  But when my ED began I was already about 26 or 27 and it was relatively short lived (3-ish years).  My body suffered a great deal of damage, some permanent that will affect me forever, from my ED.  But the whole thought process and psychologocal part of it is totally gone.   I only say that I'm 95% recovered because it has been a short time (about 6 months) since I felt as though I have truly kicked it.  I was struggling through recovery for about 9 months to a year before I really felt like I was totally and completely over it. 

I think both age of onset & duration of the ED must play a part.  If the ED is developed at 14 or 15 or even 18 or 19, the person really doesn't have a perspective on how a "normal" adult eats or works out.  The only personal experiences they have to draw from are of disordered thoughts, feelings, and actions. 

And of course the longer something continues the harder it is to change... that goes for everything... smoking, drinking, even folding laundry a certain way, or loading the dishwasher a certain way.  Things become habit and habits are hard to break.  But with habits that have underlying psychological causes it makes it all that much harder.

I guess I'm rambling, but I think this is an interesting concept.

i think the most salient factor isn't age of onset but the length of time the person is entrenched in the ED thinking.  i know one young woman who considers herself fully in recovery.  she had a later age of onset (17), was diagnosed very quickly (dad's a therapist and caught on fast), and was treated immediately.  she's doing very well.

on the flip side, i know another whose behaviours started when she was 11, was in and out of inpatient treatment for a decade, has all kinds of long-term health problems due to her ED.  she also considers herself in recovery, but she's a compusive exerciser and is dishonest with herself and just about everyone around her.  she might not restrict, binge, or purge, but she's still sick.

i also think the medical definition of recovery is problematic.  we all know that EDs aren't really about food and weight, so why is recovery defined by them?

but the notion that someone needs to be completely free of ED thoughts to be healthy is flawed, too.  it's all a matter of degree--both illness and wellness--and none of us has a perfectly healthy mind.  we all have disordered thinking; the key is to know the difference between those thoughts and the healthy ones.

hi - this is a really interesting topic. i was inpatient for awhile. i am 25, i developd anorexia at 20. i too am 95% recovered. and while i was inpatient i saw those that were on that same road. but i also saw those who i knew in my heart would never recover. those that were eventually asked to leave the programme due to their failure to make the commitment to comply with recovery. i still see a clinical psychologist. he told me that he chatted to the director of this programme and she said to him that beyond the 5 year mark if it isnt tackled, really there is little hope. thats not to say its impossible.

but you can see it even here, there are a few long term sufferers, who will make any excuse under the sun to stay unwell. i think the fear of happiness just exceeds their capacity to grasp.

its sad really. and recovery is not inevitable, but yeah i think one or two full relapses indicates those who will not recover

I've heard that 5-20% of people die from ED's... which is pretty scary when you think about it, esspecily if you have one! :S
And I'm pretty sure a higher percentage of people who overcome an ED go back again.. it's not really something you can just forget about...

But I think all of this depends on how badly you have it.

Interesting, I think you are right. My ED started when I was 13 and even though I am physically recovered and I'd say mostly mentally recovered. There is always that tiny little bit of me that I have to argue with to eat "normally." Thanks for the thought!

I need to educate myself more on that topic. when you say ED, do you mean people who starve themselves and are very skinny? how about people who overeat, do they have ED too?

PG, if ED is not about food and weight? what is it about? e.g. I used to overeat since I was a kid. I remember I would eat more food than any other child in the class. my mom used to tell me that I need self discpline and control my appetite. I don't really know if it is a self control issue or ED? and how would I know?

Original Post by safina1:

I need to educate myself more on that topic. when you say ED, do you mean people who starve themselves and are very skinny? how about people who overeat, do they have ED too?
people who overeat [or binge] may also fit the criteria of an eating disorder. but you do not have to be very skinny or overweight to be diagnosed. EDNOS [or eating disorder not otherwise specified] is like a combination of different ed characteristics or symptoms [I would love if someone else could add on to this, as I don't know much on the topic]. So if you have all the characteristics of anorexia [distorted body image, extreme calorie restriction etc.] but you are still a normal weight you could have ednos.

PG, if ED is not about food and weight? what is it about? e.g. I used to overeat since I was a kid. I remember I would eat more food than any other child in the class. my mom used to tell me that I need self discpline and control my appetite. I don't really know if it is a self control issue or ED? and how would I know?
Eating disorders are about unhealthy attitudes towards food and weight, and also control. 
and I think if you feel that you have a problem, the best thing to do is see a doctor [don't try and diagnose yourself]. I think if you're within a healthy weight range at the moment it shouldn't be much of an issue, because it doesn't sound like you have much anxiety around food etc.

 

 My eating became disorded at the beginning of last year [age 14] and I think it lasted a bit over a year. I have been weight restored for about a week.
I'm now where near mental restoration. Sure, I get around 2000 calories a day and I have more energy; I look and feel more alive, my hair looks a little better, I haven't felt dizzy/lightheaded for a couple of months and I don't purge, but put a donut or fries near me and I'll run for the hills.
I want to not have to plan out my meals or hyperventilate when I'm served pizza. and I certainly don't want to be a perfectionist, because no one is perfect.

I believe that everyone can recover.

I remember how every day I made my food choices, how every day I recorded my weights and goals, quite conscious of what I was doing. I could have chosen not to do all those things just as anyone could.

I'm sorry but I do believe I did it to myself. o.O I am, however, recovered. I don't want to go back there because I don't want to ruin and disrupt the friendships and relationships I have now & that's what an ED does!

Very good topic.  This is something I've thought a lot about and have come to accept that I will never be completely free of my ED.  I was raised by a mother who basically taught me disordered eating and have never had a "normal" relationship with food - whether it be yo yo dieting, binging, overexercising, or restricting.  And since age 16 (I'm 30 now) I've been battling anorexia on and off.  It's something I have to constantly be vigilent about in order to avoid relapse.  I'm currently dealing with my most recent relapse and my personal definition of recovery is probably different than most people's - I want to be able to be able to be physically active, live a more balanced life, and at a healthy weight again.  I have accepted that having a "normal" relationship just isn't possible for me.  But, I'm ok with that and accepting that has been very comforting to me.

but why and how ED is NOT about food and weight?

I've been battling my eating disorder since I was 9 - I honestly don't remember what a normal relationship with food was like. Even when I was "recovered" and at a healthy weight, my OCD still affected the way I ate and imposed weird rituals and rules on my food intake. I don't even realize that these aren't normal thought processes most of the time. Even though I am trying to refeed and gain now to get to a healthy weight, I don't think I will ever not have disordered thoughts when it comes to food. 

I really think it is like any other addiction/disordered thought pattern. Even when an alcoholic stops the physical act of drinking, they still are and always will be an alcoholic.

Original Post by skippinggirlvinegar:

I want to not have to plan out my meals or hyperventilate when I'm served pizza. and I certainly don't want to be a perfectionist, because no one is perfect.

Very well put. I think recovery is relative to how long you've suffered and how deep it went. I was only anorexic for about six months, and I was oldish (21) and I think that has helped me to recover fairly quickly. However, I have been exposed to disordered eating and negative body issues for my entire life by my mother, and so some things are very difficult to break out of. I too am recovered physically, but struggle with ED thoughts everyday. On the other hand, I never ever want to go back to the misery that is restricting and losing weight.

Original Post by ecwk6:

I really think it is like any other addiction/disordered thought pattern. Even when an alcoholic stops the physical act of drinking, they still are and always will be an alcoholic.

 I disagree... sort of... I think for some people it may be like other addictions, but for others its not.  To make an analogy: Someone can use cocaine often for a few years during high school or college and then when they have to go out on their own and make a living they stop using it without much trouble, and never do it again.  I think for some people its a lifelong thing and for others its a phase - for both ED and addictions/alcoholism

Original Post by sugarshocked:

Original Post by ecwk6:

I really think it is like any other addiction/disordered thought pattern. Even when an alcoholic stops the physical act of drinking, they still are and always will be an alcoholic.

 I disagree... sort of... I think for some people it may be like other addictions, but for others its not.  To make an analogy: Someone can use cocaine often for a few years during high school or college and then when they have to go out on their own and make a living they stop using it without much trouble, and never do it again.  I think for some people its a lifelong thing and for others its a phase - for both ED and addictions/alcoholism

You make a very good point. I guess I was really only speaking for myself from my experiences. I suppose it is different for everyone.

It would be nice to have be FULLY recovered, but I don't know if it is possible. Even though I'm a normal weight again and I don't count calories on what I eat, if I go to certain places where I used to know the calories of food I will start adding things up in my head or I'll count sometimes without thinking. But hey, I'm staying positive. :)

I'm 21 and I'm a recovering anorexic, and I am also a Psychology student so I know a lot about EDs as well as other disorders. I hope to one day open a clinic for young girls to help them learn to love their bodies BEFORE something like disordered eating and exercising can happen.

My personal situation I guess is "lucky", because I was only actively anorexic for a little under a year. I also sought help on my own and was never "forced" into recovery. I honestly think it depends from person to person. I still have guilty thoughts about certain foods and I probably analyze what I eat and what everyone else eats way too much, but I am POSITIVE that I will fully recover. 

I have only been recovering since April, when I finally admitted to my family and friends that I needed help, and made my own doctor, nutritionist, and therapist appointments. ED makes you think that asking for help is "weak", but I realized that true strength is allowing yourself to trust others and let them help you along. There's no shame in having extra support! I have already gained about 15 pounds (still have more to go!), and I have faced LOTS of my fear foods, and I took a trip to France in May where I ate lots of things that ED would DEF consider off-limits. (Liver pate, anyone? Escargot drenched in garlic butter? haha). 

I think that EDs are a result of so many different factors that it's difficult to make it black or white in terms of recovery. Some may always have those nagging thoughts, some may not. Stress, environment, family and social factors, as well as genetics all play a role. For me, alcoholism and depression runs in my family, and I think my ED was my attempt to control things when I felt sad and out of control. It's so true that it isn't about the food. Just like with any addiction, the addiction to exercise and calorie counting became a way for me to focus my attention on something other than my feelings. I think that if each ED sufferer can figure out what really triggered the disorder and deal w/ those underlying issues, full recovery IS possible.

It's not easy, but I'm gonna keep telling myself that I'll fully recover both physically and mentally. If you think you won't recover, you WON'T. Mind over matter, people! 

Original Post by safina1:

but why and how ED is NOT about food and weight?

it's about a lot of things, but control is central.  we (the collective we here; it's not been an issue for me) may not be able to control other people, the circumstances of our life, the way our genes fit together to construct our faces and bodies, but we can control what we eat.  that's why onset is typically in early adolescence or pre-adolescence: kids don't have a lot of power and control i their lives, and kids who conform to expectations (superachievers) are especially vulnerable.

based on my thesis research, i also believe that a big part of it is ambivalence.  we're all ambivalent on many levels, but for women with EDs, ambivalence seems to be especially uncomfortable: they have to pick sides, and they have to divide themselves between the public and the private.  so while "healthy" people can be okay with "I shouldn't but I'm going to anyway," ED-prone women either don't do it or they do it and hide it.

and then there's this whole idea of recovery.  when you're dealing with perfectionists (and most women with ED are perfectionists), recovery is an ideal.  that's a problem in itself, because recovery can never be perfect, just as health can never be perfect.

Everyone can recover. There may always be a little voice whisper in your head, but if you can overcome it, then you have recovered. As long as you stay on the healthy path.

Those who can't, die (sorry to be so blunt, but it's true).

Original Post by sugarshocked:

 I disagree... sort of... I think for some people it may be like other addictions, but for others its not.  To make an analogy: Someone can use cocaine often for a few years during high school or college and then when they have to go out on their own and make a living they stop using it without much trouble, and never do it again.  I think for some people its a lifelong thing and for others its a phase - for both ED and addictions/alcoholism

damn, sugarshocked - you nailed it.  most people respond to demands in their lives: if the cocaine use starts to interfere with their ability to work, pay the bills, maintain relationships, etc. the vast majority of users will quit.  and the same goes for people with disordered eating (i'm not a fan of the DSM, but let's distinguish between "illness" and behaviour).  we all--every damned one of us--have disordered thoughts and behaviours.  but the line between that and mental illness is not fine: it's wide and fuzzy and nobody really knows where it lives.

and the definitions of addiction are every bit as fuzzy as the ones for eating disorders.  the doctors (and AA) won't tell you, but nobody really knows.

It's hard to overcome any treatable mental illness because we remember. Physical injuries can heal, but mental ones will always be there because we can remember them.

Now if they can erase such memories of past illnesses... [think Sunshine of the Spotless Mind].

Original Post by coco621:

I'm 21 and I'm a recovering anorexic, and I am also a Psychology student so I know a lot about EDs as well as other disorders. I hope to one day open a clinic for young girls to help them learn to love their bodies BEFORE something like disordered eating and exercising can happen.

Unfortunately knowing alot about things doesn't necessarily put you in a more protected situation.... I have my undergrad degree in sociology with a minor in psych and my first masters of science was in counseling psychology.  I finished both of those degrees by the time I was 24.  And then developed an eating disorder at some point between 26-27.

I applaud you for your ambitions to open a clinic for young girls to help them love their bodies, but remember that ED aren't usually about the actual body.  Other issues and disorders (past trauma, PTSD, abuse, anxiety, depression, etc)  present in the form of the eating disorder.  I can very firmly say that I never had a problem with my body image or self esteem - quite the opposite really - I was pretty arrogant about my appearance when I was younger.  I developed my ED to cope with other things.  And it wasn't until about 6 months into it that my body image was affected.  My body image has pretty much been restored on its own (without conscious effort) as I've dealt with my other issues appropriately and no longer have ED thoughts or behaviors.

Just something to think about