recovery yet again uggghh

is there a limit to the amount i should try to eat and in certain ratios (carbs/protein/fat) or should i just try to eat as much healthy food as possible

Please read this:

THE AIM IS TO GAIN: A Guide to Weight Gain, Whatever Your Reason - UPDATED

And why do you say "ugh" about recovery? Although it may be tough, and it will take a lot of effort on your part, think of it as the first day of the rest of your life. Congratulations on taking the first steps!

Eat plenty, eat regularly and choose as good a mix of different foods as you can access.... nutrtitious and not-so-nutritious.... they will all help you gain weight and are therefore all healthy.  The genuinely unhealthy thing is being underweight.   

The opposite of 'recovery' is 'deterioration'....  Now that really would be 'uggh'

I'm sick of everyone worrying about fat and carb and protein ratios and whole foods and natural foods and blah blah! Don't replace one obsession with another. Normal people without EDs don't worry about all that stuff. Just eat a balance of healthy foods AND sweets/junk foods, and you'll be good to go!

you should be having three meals and snacks with all the food groups, and anything else is brillant to , you cant over eat go for it , make this the final recovery !  h xx

Original Post by coco621:

I'm sick of everyone worrying about fat and carb and protein ratios and whole foods and natural foods and blah blah! Don't replace one obsession with another. Normal people without EDs don't worry about all that stuff. Just eat a balance of healthy foods AND sweets/junk foods, and you'll be good to go!

^That

If you're eating a good variety of things, you shouldn't need to worry too much about ratios - they tend to adjust themselves naturally. Overthinking is what got us into this mess in the first place. If we were living 'naturally' we wouldn't have developed these issues. Food REALLY IS NOT meant to be so complicated!

cheers to everyone on here, you are all so supportive. i just find it really hard to stick to my diet, i always add extra veg to fill myself up and stuff, its like theres a voice inside me telling me ill get fat from it, its crazy

I hope no one thinks I was too harsh. I just really get frustrated w/ this forum sometimes because I think people recovering from ED use "clean eating" as a way to mask their fears of certain foods. Normal people, especially young people (which many people on this forum are!), eat candy and potato chips AS WELL AS apples and wheat bread and "healthy" things. My nutritionist even encourages me to have dessert every single day at lunch AND dinner! So, have a healthy wrap or sandwich and veggies, but have a cookie or two as well! Recovering from ED is not only about gaining weight, but about re-learning how to have a healthy and FUN relationship with food.

I admit, I still have issues with certain things, and I definitely also have the ED voice telling me I'll get "fat" or that certain foods are "bad", but I try to make little goals for myself. I used to be SO afraid of cheese because it's "fattening", but by adding just one slice of cheese to my sandwich, I was able to overcome that fear. It takes time, but the overall result (being NORMAL about food again) will hopefully be well worth it.

Keep it up, everyone!

The whole point is to get fatter, heavier, bigger ...   Somehow the word 'fat' has to convert from being 'uggh' and/or scary to the holy grail

If you need something to fill you up from now on go with peanut butter on bread, a banana or something that's going to get you nice and fat!

Original Post by coco621:

I hope no one thinks I was too harsh. I just really get frustrated w/ this forum sometimes because I think people recovering from ED use "clean eating" as a way to mask their fears of certain foods. Normal people, especially young people (which many people on this forum are!), eat candy and potato chips AS WELL AS apples and wheat bread and "healthy" things. My nutritionist even encourages me to have dessert every single day at lunch AND dinner! So, have a healthy wrap or sandwich and veggies, but have a cookie or two as well! Recovering from ED is not only about gaining weight, but about re-learning how to have a healthy and FUN relationship with food.

I admit, I still have issues with certain things, and I definitely also have the ED voice telling me I'll get "fat" or that certain foods are "bad", but I try to make little goals for myself. I used to be SO afraid of cheese because it's "fattening", but by adding just one slice of cheese to my sandwich, I was able to overcome that fear. It takes time, but the overall result (being NORMAL about food again) will hopefully be well worth it.

Keep it up, everyone!

Not too harsh at all, coco. In fact, you are precisely on the money. And the further I continue with recovery the more I realise that we have to be TOUGH with our fellow ED sufferers. Cow-towing to their insecurities isn't doing them any favours, though I completely (and I really, truly do), empathise with what they're going through. I've been there, I'm still there to an extent (even if further along in the journey). I know that people who were too soft with me just enabled my ED to manipulate situations to its own advantage. This wasn't the fault of the people concerned - bless them all, they really did try to help. But I KNOW how manipulative ED can be. And sometimes the best people for those suffering are people who basically give them a conceptual slap in the face and tell them to CUT THE CRAP. Which is why I always totally see where fidgy is coming from :P

this forum is great, its full of people who have been, or are where i am, which never usually happens, thanks everyone.

but is it normal for when you start to eat more carbs and calories to look and feel really bloated and ill for the rest of the day? because it just puts me off eating them because i hate the feeling

Yes, it would be normal for someone with malnutrition to experience digestion issues when they initially eat more than normal.  There are some tips for keeping this manageable until you get used to the extra food.

• Eat 'little and often' in terms of frequent meals and snacks rather than having very big meals in one hit... smaller meals are easier to digest. 
• Choose more energy-dense, low-bulk foods.... e.g. oils, oily fish, nuts/nut butters, avocados, dried fruit, full-fat dairy products.   These mean you're getting high-calorie meals that aren't too large.
• Sip plenty of fluids during the day (2 litres isn't a bad average)...  dehydration can lead to a sluggish digestion.  Warm drinks like tea are better on the digestion than ice-cold ones.  Avoid fizzy drinks.  
• Take a short walk after meals.... gentle exercise helps the digestion
• Eat fewer high-bulk, low-energy foods.... e.g fewer vegetables and salads.  These are too filling for too few calories and can often cause excess gas.
• Keep fruit intake moderate.  Fruit can be quite acidic and this can also cause gas in the stomach.
• Avoid diet foods ... they're not only counter-productive for weight-gain but they also tend to contain a lot of ingredients like thickeners and sweeteners that can upset the stomach.

cheers, you seem to have ALOT of info :D

i just had a large bowl of porridge with protein powder, a banana, a glass of milk and a turkey bacon and tomato sandwich for breakfast, good start?

Not a bad start at all!  However, if you're trying to avoid feeling bloated you might want to separate that down a bit.  Oats plus bread plus banana is a lot of bulk.  You could start with the banana, milk and porridge and then, a little later when it's had chance to go down a bit have a protein-rich 'full English' of eggs, (proper) bacon, tomatoes & sausages.... more calories but less filling.

how many calories should i be aiming for anyway? above 3000? or just as many as i can

above 3000 is great but as long as you're getting at least 2500 without exercise then you're doing great!!

if i play a football match, how much extra should i eat?

If you're severely underweight then don't do something as energetic as a football match because it could put your body under too much strain.  If you're only marginally underweight you'd need to easily add an extra 1000-1500 cals to your usual 3000 to offset the energy used up.  If that sounds too daunting, then it's another good reason not to play football for the time being.

the football match went really bad, i couldnt run and had no consentration, now im going to try a week with no exercise, no running up and down stairs, no early morning jogs and no push and pull ups. and as much carbs as i can. hopefully this might do something

You definitely need to stop exercising so much - that is an awful lot for someone trying to recover from an ED. Even if you are not at an extremely dangerous BMI - the mentality behind the exercise is unhealthy. Let your body heal itself. Eat well. Lots of carbs are good, but do NOT forget about fats and proteins. I don't care what anybody says - I can eat my body weight in carbohydrates and it doesn't do anything. You need substantial amounts of fat and protein as well to rebuild and restore muscle and organ tissues, as well as to repair brain function. 

yeah thanks thats all really good info, my brain just isnt in it at the moment