Sad Topic....
I'm afraid that I am approaching the ending of my beloved "haley's" life. Strong possibility that she has lymphoma...ever though need aspiration of neck node came back negative...long story there....
I guess my question is, putting your pet to sleep. How did you do it? Did you physically hold your baby while being put down? I'm not sure how I'm going to deal with this.
Any help/insight appreciated.
~H~
Yes, you can hold your pet while it's being put down. If that's too much for you they won't make you do it. You can have it done at the vet clinic, but some places offer at home service if that would make it more comfortable.
The best advice I've heard about knowing when "it's time" is to make a list of the 5 things Haley loves to do the most. Once she can no longer do those 5 things, it's time.
I hope it's not lymphoma. Please keep us updated. Good luck and take care.
My advice is this: please speak candidly with your veterinarian about your concerns. He or she should explain the process, what you can expect to see or experience, and what options are available to you. Consider carefully if you want to hold Haley at the time your vet does the procedure; will you feel sorry if you don't, or do you think it's too traumatic to do so? Either way, you should do what feels best for you. If you don't think you're up to holding her, someone on staff will hold her so she has contact during her last moments.
Try to have someone with you, someone supportive who understands what Haley means to you, to help you and make sure you get home okay afterward.
There are support groups that can help with the grieving process; it helps to interact with people who relate, because sometimes people don't understand how much our pets mean to us, and they can say the wrong things.
Again, please accept my condolences. I know you will miss Haley, but your courage will enable her to pass peacefully, without suffering. *more hugs*
Ughh, it's awful, so sorry you're having to go though this. It really is the best way though. It's just not fair for them to suffer.
We've unfortunately have had several. And now we have a very, very old horse who's aging rapidly lately. I've owned him since I was 11, for 25 years! It sound's awful, but I really hope I look out the window one day and he's gone from a heart attack or stroke. But I just don't think that in his case I can make the right decision with him. I'm afraid I'll let him go way to long, selfishly.
Personally I don't like to stay, but sometimes circumstances make it where you have to. Some people like to stay to keep their pet calm. Just remember the previous poster is right. If you decide you just can't take it, our vet said that they do have someone holding and petting the animal the whole time. They just don't stick them in a cage all alone.
Sad stories below, don't read on if you don't want to...Either way, remember we're all here with you. Just ask for support, and you'll get it!
Our cat had a brain tumor. I had them do it in another room. Our vet's office was so nice. They actually have a "grieving room", and then when it was done they brought her back to me in a cardboard coffin (yes coffin not just a box!) so we could bring her home and bury her.
Our great dane was the worst emotionally. He was the absolute BEST pet we've ever had, and that's saying a lot, because over the last 20 years, we've probably had 15 dogs and 20 cats. Anyway, he had lung cancer, and we let him go as long as we could. The day finally came, and we all went. After we had our few minutes with him to say goodbye, and since we didn't want to see it happen, a vet tech came to take him. Now he had had lots of test and stuff, and had always walked off with them before no problem. This time however, it seemed like he KNEW. He literally planted his feet, braced them against the doorway and refused to go through it. He weighed all of 75 lbs (should have been 125) and the tech could not get him to go. My husband had to take him from the tech and go with them, I just couldn't. We were all bawling like babies, even the tech who I'm sure probably has to go through this a lot (I'm tearing up now as I type and it's been 5 years). We had him cremated and he's in a very nice box next to our bed.
We've already had two horses done, one from injury, and one from disease, and you have to be there, to hold them for the vet. You can't just put a horse to "sleep" exactly. You sedate them and then OD them on barbiturates, and they can seize, it's terrible!
It's so strange - I always used to say that I thought people were crazy for spending thousands of dollars on vet bills to try and keep pets alive for just a little longer, etc. Then, years later, my little Scrappy got sick. That's him in my picture. He was born at our house, and we had him for almost 15 years. I would have paid any amount just to have him back and feeling good - I finally understood why people would do anything for their pets.
It did eventually come to a point where we actually scheduled the procedure - even though we were heartbroken, but he just wasn't himself and he couldn't do the things that he wanted to do (like the first reply). He was always a big hunter and loved to catch rats and lizards, etc. He could barely walk to his water dish. That was when we knew that it would be better for him to not have to suffer and be in pain.
It ended kind of in the best way it could have, actually. The day before he was scheduled to be put to sleep, he suddenly perked up and even ate almost a whole can of cat food (unheard of since his illness had really gotten bad) and he was walking around and talking to us just like he used to and hadn't done for about two months. So, of course, we called and canceled - thinking he would get better. I was so happy that I got to spend that last day with him. He died the next day at home. That was Thanksgiving Day, last year. I still think about him all the time, but I am just so glad that he wanted to say goodbye to us so he gathered his strength and had one last day with us.
Good luck with your baby - and just to give you some hope, one vet tried to tell us that Scrappy was going to have to be put down about three years ago, and we were able to nurse him back to health even when the vets couldn't and he lived a good, healthy and happy two years after that.
I should have heeded the warning. Now I am crying at work. Your stories are very sad and touching...I do not look forward to the day I lose my fur babies. I try to prepare for it, mentally, knowing it will happen given their shorter life spans...but I am sure there is just no way to really prepare. My heart goes out to you, haley_2008.
I'm sorry. We don't know each other well yet but I have great compassion for anyone going through something so painful. When I had to let my Missy go, I sat on the floor and held her and petted her. I didn't want her to be alone, and love and attention from me was her favorite thing, so that's how I wanted her to go. Some people prefer to say their goodbyes and have the vet do it when they are not in the room, for their own reasons that are just as valid. There is no right or wrong way. And it hurts so much either way.
Sending strength and good thoughts your way.
It is a personal choice. We had a cat put to sleep and it wasn't a good thing to watch in his case. The vet administers a tranquilizer to relax the animal so they are not reactive to the actual medication that puts them to sleep, but in our case the cat just wouldn't give in. He had to have a second shot and it caused convolutions. Still the vet was compassionate and asked me to leave the room while he did whatever he did to help the cat transition faster so his experience didn't get any worse than it already was. I still have no clue what the vet did while I was in my kitchen, but I know he was very much concerned about me and the cat the whole time.
It was a hard decision, but I could not have lived with myself if he was suffering when he was a good friend.
He is buried in the backyard under a rose bush I bought just for him.
I'm so sorry to hear this. Pets become a part of us and are so hard to part with. The only pet I've had the vet put down, I didn't want to be in the room. I actually just had a bunny pass this past weekend, so previous posts have made me all teary eyed. I was home at the time, and it was hard to see him start to go and not be able to do anything about it. Almost completely unexpected. But, I had another bunny that passed a while back at home and knew that it was for the best. He just wasn't able to be a bunny anymore.
But it doesn't make it much easier knowing they're better off.
I'm so sorry you are losing your pet. My pets died of extreme old age, one of them from complications of diabetes, and I made the decision when I felt their quality of life was too difficult and that they were suffering.
I held each of them in my arms, wrapped in a favorite blanket and talked to them while the vet administered the shot. It was a very peaceful ending to all their pain.
The oldest was my cat, Einstein, who lived to be 21 and was blind and deaf at the end, and was in pain from arthritis. I'd had him from the day he was born. We never forget them, do we?
I'm still sore about putting my Pfefferneuse to sleep. She only lived to be a few months, but because my neighbours where shoddy cat breeders, she had faulty kidneys.
They let me hold her when she was 'leaving', and even though it was almost a year ago, I'm still choked up about it.
And then when I had to put my goat Ancho down, I didn't get such a nice experience there. The vet wouldn't put the lame goat down himself and I had to do it myself :/
Anyway, it's better to do it that way, at least you'll know they aren't scared or anything when they leave. I'm sending you as much positive Kharam for you and hope your beloved Harley :)
You have a tough decision to make. When I put both of my babies down, the final answer came when I asked, "Is my cat suffering more than they should be? Can the suffering be alleviated?" I answered yes to the first and no to the second.
My first cat I had been given when I was 3 years old. We finally had her put down when I was 20 and recently married and pregnate. She had 6 surgeries to remove cancer and the cancer kept coming back faster each time. She wouldn't let anyone even touch her she was in so much pain. My vet let me hold her when he administered the shot. She just "fell asleep" in my arms. Teeny was put down 18 years ago and im still crying.
The second cat I had put down didn't like to be held so I was not there when he was given the shot. We decided to put him down when he refused to eat or drink anything after three days. The three different vets we took him to could never tell us what exactly was wrong with him though. I believe he had a cancer of some type becuase he had an odor like he was dying from the inside. Precious was put down a little over a year ago, he was 16 years old.
The day Precious died, I went and rescued a wild kitty at my job site that I had been trying to tame for about 3 months. The kitty is now a strictly indoor housecat named Stash.
Whatever decision you make, my heart goes out to you.
I am crying as I read these posts. My little furball was 16 1/2 years old, little toy poodle. I bought her when she was 6 weeks old, she was my little girl. She got sick and I did everything, down to giving her IV injections everyday to help flush her kidneys. I had to tell my vet... you have to tell me when its time. I knew I had lost my perspective and needed an objective opinion. We reached that point one morning 4 years ago.
My thoughts were this.. I owed it to her to be there when she died, I cared for her and loved her when she lived. I owed her that when she died. I didnt want her to be alone or with strangers. So I went in the room and held her. The doc gave her a shot and it was so quick, quiet and took about 10 seconds. Broke my heart. But she really just went to sleep. Almost 4 years later I am sitting here crying as I type this.
I haven't lost any long time pets (I've had rats live 2-3yrs and its sad but I know when my cats go it'll be much harder). I have worked in a vet clinic though, and had to be present during many euthanasias, my job being to hold them :/ . It happens very fast when they do the IV injection (seconds), the animal goes completely limp (not the same as when sleeping), and you can seriously see the 'life' go from their eyes (which don't close). Not to upset you, but give you an idea what to expect. The staff I worked with were very nice and sympathetic to the owners, our clinic even had a little furnished room for people to spend some time with their pet, and could do the euthanasia there instead of on an exam table. Personally I don't think I would want to hold them (cat/small dog), because that limp feeling is very weird to me..but probably want to pet them, hold a paw or something.
Such sad news {{Hugs}}
I think it comes down to what you feel you have to do.....
Do you feel that you should be there holding her? if not then please don't put yourself through it. That may sound harsh but I'm speaking from my own personal experience with a cat I had to get put down and a dog.
First and foremost it is completely painless and very fast, but they know!
My very first experience with this was the one and only cat I have ever had. I loved that cat we were very in tune with each other and I had him for 11yrs when I was told that due to ill health the best course of action would be to put him to sleep. I felt that I owed it to him to be there to the end.....
OMG never again, never in a million years did I imagine the pain I would feel, I swear I felt my heart break! I had to be taken to a back room given a cup of tea until I had calmed down enough to drive home.
Some years later I found myself in a similar situation, when a wee dog I had was ordered to be destroyed by the court for an attack he made on someone else's dog and then bit the owner of that dog too! I had rescued him so I knew he had problems and I put a lot of time and money into trying to socialise him but it didn't work. Remembering what I had gone through with my cat I spoke to the vet and they agreed to give me a gel sedative for him, by the time I got to the vets he was fast asleep (alive) and therefore unaware of where he was or what was about to happen. Although still upsetting it was a lot easier to handle I handed my sleeping dog to the vet who took him to a room and did the deed whilst I waited.
I would recommend this to everyone OK it costs a little more but better for them and for you.
I know they don't know that you are about to kill them but they pick up from you that something very upsetting is about to happen. The sedative before you even go to the vet reduces that.
All best wishes to you.
I am sorry you are having to do this. I know it is hard.
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