Self Image Shows

Just a small story that I thought would be nice to share.

On saturday night I went out to dinner with my roommate. This weekend was the Bastille Celebration (a French celebration of which I know little other than it was happening and I should head out because of that). We went to dinner at a french restaurant with some live music playing cause of the celebration.

There was a little space in front of the band to do some dancing and a girl and guy got up to dance. Now this girl wasn't a thin model type girl, she was a regular girl. It was tough to tell but I think she may have had a bit of extra weight, but lets suffice to say that she wasn't a 120/130 lb girl. But the way she danced, lordy! She had confidence, she was smiling, she was enjoying dancing (nothing lewd), and because of this I was really attracted to her. I thought and still think she was really beautiful and I was a bit jealous of the guy dancing with her (because 1 - she was good looking, 2 - she had fun dancing, 3 - he couldn't dance his way out of a barn). I wanted to be there dancing with her instead (I also absolutely love dancing. Peculiar for a guy, I know).

I would have thought her pretty even if she hadn't gone up to dance, but once I saw her smile and enjoy herself I found her quite entrancing.

I just want to re-iterate what we all tell each other but not all of us believe: confidence is attractive and it shows. When you overlook your own flaws others will too. This girl danced because she wanted to and enjoyed it because she could. Also, the ONLY people who danced were this girl and one or two other guys she brought up from the table she was with. Be confident and you'll get those notices and looks that we see to gauge ourselves on.

Original Post by decarswell:

(I also absolutely love dancing. Peculiar for a guy, I know).

As a guy, I disagree with this sentence. :) I ALSO love dancing. :) It's alot of fun. :) Whether you're good at it or not, it's fun. :) Being good at it.. maybe makes it more fun

Original Post by decarswell:

I just want to re-iterate what we all tell each other but not all of us believe: confidence is attractive and it shows. When you overlook your own flaws others will too. This girl danced because she wanted to and enjoyed it because she could. Also, the ONLY people who danced were this girl and one or two other guys she brought up from the table she was with. Be confident and you'll get those notices and looks that we see to gauge ourselves on.

Indeed!

How true, and I really admire confidence also. I just need to work on mine

I completley agree with you, confidence is very sexy. But in my opinion, overlooking your flaws and actually being confident: easier said than done.

Just wanted to say to the OP... I have read several of your posts recentely and just wanted to say that I always enjoy reading what you write and you seem like a really cool person.

I agree.  I do lack confidence in reality but the way I carry myself, my fiance always says that I have a 'strut'.  I do not have a strut as he says but I do carry myself well and hold my head high.  It does make a difference.

It's good to know I'm not the only male out there who enjoys dancing. Unfortunately though you've given me competition and I cannot enjoy that. We'll have to have some sort of dance off.

En garde!

lol! Please film said dance off, and post it on youtube for all to see. I'm quite interested in witnessing this, haahahaha!

I truly admire people like the girl you described.  I can't seem to be like that myself, though!  I would have been one of the girls sitting off to the side, watching, and wishing I was like her!  One of my goals is to be confident and comfortable like that.

Also -- Please let us know when the dance off is posted! =P

This reminds me of the time my bf took me to his works ball... the band and dj was playing all 60's hits, and he took me up to dance... we were the first ones on the floor and at first I was a little embarrassed to be the one being watched, but soon there were loads of people on the dancefloor. We had a great time just doing our thing, and to be honest, it felt like there was just us there. So when we were a little drunker and a little wilder, we noticed that one of the couples who had been sitting at our table and had been dancing for a while next to us, actually moved to a different part of the floor to boogie. We just laughed.

But, yeah, a guy with a great smile, and puts in the effort to talk to me and make me laugh, wins me over more than a guy who thinks he has a great body and is so full of himself that he gives birth to clones when he poops.

Original Post by decarswell:

It's good to know I'm not the only male out there who enjoys dancing. Unfortunately though you've given me competition and I cannot enjoy that. We'll have to have some sort of dance off.

En garde!

OK, well..

name your events ;)

Do you Cha-Cha? Tango? Swing? Waltz? Foxtrot?

Take this *does a fifth-position break!* Muahahahaha

Why are HK and Decar dancing together? Yeesh you turn your back for 2 minutes...and anarchy reigns...

Welcome to The Lounge, Kathy ;)

Deflep - I want to get across the point that this girl was just like you! There was no special quality that sets her apart except the willingness to take a chance. I think we should all take that chance and we may just be surprised to find out what the results can be. If she looked my way she woulda known for sure I thought she was good looking. :)

HK - Tango and Rhumba. With some Salsa, mind you. I find the waltz to be more of a dance for Squares and the Foxtrot? Pish, posh. How old are we here? I will Rhumba you into the ground. So much Salsa and Rhumba that in the end you will need new ankles.

*settles into the Dancing Tiger style*

Original Post by decarswell:

HK - Tango and Rhumba. With some Salsa, mind you. I find the waltz to be more of a dance for Squares and the Foxtrot? Pish, posh. How old are we here? I will Rhumba you into the ground. So much Salsa and Rhumba that in the end you will need new ankles.

*settles into the Dancing Tiger style*

Foxtrot and Waltz are for those of us with wives ;) Do not mock the power of the Waltz or Foxtrot, when properly exercuted, to make your partner yearn for your male companionship ;)

Heck.. really, any dance, but Foxtrot and Waltz are EASY, at least to start. :)

Tango and Rhumba. And Salsa, for fun. Good combination. :D

But Swing is good, too. :D Tsk tsk tsk at you for missing that one ;)

Foxtrot - I've forgotten how to, mostly. I could pick it up again in about 2 minutes if I saw the steps done again. I remember the fast foxtrot though.

Waltz - I spin too much, normally and I tend to lose the rhythm in the waltz. I enjoy it, but not as much as the others. Since I didn't do much of it I never expanded to dancing outside of the original waltz box. It is a very nice and elegant dance though.

I'll have to remember that little bit about the yearning for companionship bit but I think I understand well the jist of it. After dinner I went out with friends to a club and I spent about 3 hours dancing that night. I was also looking around a little to see if anyone was noticing it (cause I was dancing with an acquaintance) and I saw quite a few women looking at us with what I can only assume was a slight bit of envy and desire to dance like us (or as I hope with me, lol).

Those 3 are my favourite dances. I've never tried swing dancing and I've done some cha cha (which I find quirky and fun, but gets old quick).

I took a ballroom dancing beginners class (made my ex gf go with me because I wanted to do it, not her at first) and loved it.

That being said, to any girls in Kingston Ontario this upcoming school year - I need a partner for more dancing? Anyone want to learn with me? (I expect no responses, lol)

Where have you gleaned your dance skills HK? I desire the secret to your confidence so that I may shatter it at the heels of my skill!

I cannot dance to save my life. And so I dont dance. actually i cant dance when im sober when im at a club i dance but dunno if im any good cause im drunk :P oh and I dont mean foxtrot and waltz I mean club dancing im no good at it

Original Post by decarswell:

Where have you gleaned your dance skills HK? I desire the secret to your confidence so that I may shatter it at the heels of my skill!

Arthur Murray Dance School. Expensive but, IMO, totally worth it.

My wife and I both agreed we wanted to do more than just clutch onto each other and sway for our first dance (we got married May 31), so we signed up for lessons, and decided we both loved dancing. Enough that we've signed up for the Bronze program.

And I'm telling you, girls find guys who can dance and have a good time (and I don't just mean 'have a good time') very alluring. :) Next time you go with your friends, you should totally pick up a couple of the women and spin them around the dance floor. :) You'll make their night and who knows, maybe they'll make yours. ;)

I love Swing, mostly because it's a great dance to do to alot of today's music. "Club Swing" (Arthur Murray's name for the Hustle) too. You dance, you spin, you have fun.

Just learned Cha-Cha. Haven't learned Salsa yet, but we intend to. :)

im a cc - so what exactly is club dancing? Cause most of what I see in clubs amounts to dry humping strangers. It's cool if that's what you're into, but there is so much more thrill in the true dance.

HK - never heard of the place. I took the class at university almost two years ago now. I'm planning on taking it again in the fall. Is this a professional dance school or something along those lines?

As for the first dance, have you ever seen those coordinated first dance videos? I wanted to do one of those for mine, but I saw on tv the other day that there is a reality show that teaches couples how to do a coordinated dance properly for their first dance together and the show makes me feel like my stolen idea will no longer be quite so unique come marriage time. Ah well. Maybe one day my dancing dreams will come true, lol.

What is this bronze program? I want to take the beginners class in the fall and then do the advanced class in the winter. That will make my year. I agree with women finding the dancing alluring. My ex and I took the course together and when we'd go dancing at clubs she'd make a crack about all the girls looking at me/us and I wouldn't believe her. Then she'd point it out to me and I'd get embarassed. I like it now though. My problem is always the shyness. I don't know when women want to be approached and don't want to get rejected so I stick to dancing with friends and having a great time that way. I really ought to take that little chance. I'm considering going out alone this friday so I can find someone to dance with. lol.

Any dance the swing compares to? My favourite to do to todays music is either Salsa or Rhumba. Mostly cause you do so many turns in the Rhumba if you know what you're doing. And you can even do a little razzle dazzle once you've got the experience!

Original Post by decarswell:

im a cc - so what exactly is club dancing? Cause most of what I see in clubs amounts to dry humping strangers. It's cool if that's what you're into, but there is so much more thrill in the true dance.

"dry humping" sounds a bit perverted, I meant something like that but not that close. and Im not into any Hip Hop stuff I like Rock music (new stuff and classics) which is so hard to dance too. I dont think a waltz to it is acceptable, might be fun though.