Shame on you! A kind word can go a long way...

Hello everyone! I am a new member and very excited about getting on track with my eating habits.  Knowing that their are hundreds of people experiencing the same up and downs that i am, and knowing that they are fighting threw it, is a comforting feeling. Recently I was feeling like a failure (not really sticking to my plan) and decided to scroll threw the forums for a lil "pick me up". I cant tell you how many great stories I read. BUT, I was shocked to see that in some of the replies people saying hurtful things. SHAME ON YOU! This is a site with REAL people, REAL stories, REAL struggles & accomplishments, and most of all REAL feelings. Were you not taught to think before you speak (or post replies).

I would like to encourage everyone to sit back and remember a time when you were feeling down for whatever reason. If someone had taken the time to stop and share a kind word with you (ex. "you look GREAT" or "tomorrows a new day"), how would that have made you feel. No, it would not fix all your problems but it absolutely helps ease them. Today, take the time to say a kind or encouraging word to someone you know or perhaps a stranger struggling with their own weight loss journey. You'll be amazed how good it will make YOU feel while giving them a "pick me up". A kind word can go a long way. If you give you will receive.

THANK YOU- To everyone who's taken the time to share a kind or encouraging word with me. It really helped when I was feeling down.

('through' not 'threw')

Support comes in all shapes and sizes, same as people do.  What one person finds encouraging another may find trite and schmaltzy.  What you class as shameful and hurtful someone else may see as a well-needed kick in the derriere.  Sometimes you can read a post on these boards and it's clear that what the writer really needs is a bit of 'tough love' and not 'tea and sympathy'.  That's not the same as saying something hurtful or mean but, hey, this is a public message board and, if you're going to bare your soul in public you should expect a few rotten tomatoes as well as bouquets of flowers.

I often sit back and remember a time when I was at my absolute lowest and my very best friend who has always been extremely supportive looked me in the eye and said "you can either carry on moping around feeling sorry for yourself and making yourself miserable or get off your arse and do something about it".....  You'd probably say she was being mean but, as it happens, that was exactly the right thing to say to me at that time.

And then there are the posts from people clearly in the grip of eating disorders and in very poor health  .... A kind word and a pick-me-up is usually not as appropriate in those cases as telling them in very straight language to get to a doctor.  If you see a man about jump from a bridge you don't offer to hold his coat....

('through' not 'threw') LOL at the grammar police.  Thanks Jane, that and 'weight' vs 'weigh' bugs me as well.

Support does come in all forms that is true.  In general I try to live by the rules that more can be obtained with a smile and a kind word.  That said, there are times when enough is enough and although I may have the face of an angel (*cough cough*) I have the spirit of a devil....the tough love comes out.

Hello and welcome Pinkprada,

I hope that you find the people and the excellent resources on CC useful.

In general people are kind and helpful here on CC.  However when you have been here a while, I think that you will begin to get a little fed up with people eating far too little and wondering why they feel like crap, or why they can't lose weight, or why they binge.  Time and time again they ignore the advise they are given.  You will also get fed up with people who are already too thin, or at a healthy weight who are taking desperate measures to lose weight they don't need to.  These people are often regulars, posting repeated similar queries while ignoring any sane advice they are given.

Personally I ignore them, but kudos to those who take the time to warn these members of the danger they are doing to themselves.  Sometimes being polite or 'nice' hasn't worked the first, second or tenth time they have been told, so a little tough love doled out.  I fully support those members who take time out of their lives to try and help those posters by whatever means they think they can.

Ax

I agree with the above posters.

Sure, there are some mean posters who are just here to be bullies, and if you are talking about them... well, they won't listen, and they certainly won't change.

But there are plenty of posters who have learned to recognize the person who needs support vs the person who needs a swift kick.

{edited, because reply was to the wrong post!}