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Somebody help...i ate 300 caloriess total today

i only ate 300 calories today. i probably burned them all off too. i worked out alot and ran. its becoming such a problem because i really love cake and ice cream and stuff and i want to eat it so bad but then after i eat it i hate myself and its like my mind makes me see fat where it isnt. i really want an apple right now but i know i wont be happy after i eat it. im 5'4 and 114 pounds. this isnt healthy but this is the only way i feel happy

Based off of your past posts and photo, I think you need to talk to your parents and seek psychological help before you harm yourself. It sounds like your headed towards an eating disorder - if you don't already have one.

yeah i know i have one...i really dont want to end up in some shrinks office who pretends to know what im going through. you know?

Believe it or not, a lot of those psychiatrists know EXACTLY what you're going through - quite a few people with past EDs aspire to become nutritionists and psychiatrists. As long as you find one specializing in EDs, it is very likely to be a beneficial experience. :)

A good question may be... do you want to recover? Do you want these thoughts to stop?

you asked the same question that i keep trying to explain to my boyfriend. i dont want them to stop. i feel like an addict. i know these thoughts are unhealthy but i weighed 130 lbs last summer and lost it during the year and this is the first year ever im going to feel hot in a bathing suit. its a great feeling and i dont want to lose it. by keeping these thoughts and losing more and more weight it makes me happy that i have that control

Why are you eating so little?  You should be eating no less than 1200 calories a day.  How do you have the energy to work out when you eat so little.?  I agree that you should speak to someone about this.  You need to get to the root of the problem.  Eating an apple won't hurt you.  You see food as the enemy and you shouldn't.  I find a way to incorporate my favsinto my day.  I love milky way so I allow 150 calories a day for two fun size bars.  You need to just relax and enjoy life.  Are you ready to mentally change your self image?  It won't work if you're not ready to.

so much hard stuff is goin on in my life right now and I just feel like putting forth the strength that it will take to fix this problem is more than i can handle right now

thank you both :) it really helps to hear other people's opinion

We all have a lot going on, some more than others but you can not neglect yourself.  You and your health; mentally, physically and emotionally should be your number one priority. You don't want to end up with major health issues.  I have a friend who recovered from an ED going on 8 years now and to this day she still has health issues, her immune system is still out of wack and she's been having a hard time getting pregnant. 

No matter how bad things are in your life, you are number one.  I'm trying to get that into my boyfriends head too.  He's on the other end, overweight.  I was too.  We are now living in Ohio, paying mortgage on a house in Baltimore because the market sucks right now and we can't sale it and paying for rent on our apartment here and I'm unemployed.  I've applied to over 50 jobs and nothing, I get the same song and dance, I'm over qualified for the position.  It stresses me out because he's got to pay for all of my bills plus his and it stresses him out because he's trying to provide for me .  But every day we work out when he gets home and I prepare and count calories for all of  his meals.   he's rather just eat fast food. You are #1!!!!!!!!!!!  Than everything else.

wow you really do have alot going on. i respect you for staying strong and staying a powerful woman! i completely agree that we should be first. wow....you gave me a totally new perspective. what should i do though? how can i stop feeling guilty for eating

eat something healthy. eat a fruit salad if you crave something sweet.. those are good sugars, sugars your body needs. or eat a lean piece of chicken. it's got protein that your body needs as well. just think, your body needs at least 1200 cals to do it's basic function. eating 300 cals then burning them off isn't going to allow your body to work properly. you will still lose weight if you stick with 1200, because your body uses that anyway, it isn't stored as fat, as long as you're eating clean.. like fruits and veggies and good carbs and stuff. good luck.

ps if you need someone just to talk to, feel free to msg me, i have unofficially been through what you're experiencing.

Find someone to talk to anytime you are feeling weak, we are all here for you.  Just shot me a msg.  Can you be open with your boyfriend or do you not feel comfortable talking to him about this.  You just have to tell yourself that you must eat to survive.  Set a target calorie intake for the day and try to stick with it.  You work out, so you shouldn't feel guilty.  When I work out I don't  feel guilty if I eat a little more.  I have gone over my target a few times but to my surprise I didn't gain anything.  Keep in mind though that under eating will stop weight loss too.  Your body will go into starvation mode.  Are you strength training?  Building muscle will help you too.  You'll tone your body and you'll look better.  As I tone I like the way I look better.  I've lost 30 lbs, I'm slimmer then i was before, but my belly does stick out a little.  But I think I look good because I'm toning up, my waist is slimming and I'm getting my curves back.  If you want help with meal planning I will be more than happy to give you some great low cal healthy recipes that i have.  We are here for you.

If you don't want to hear a rant, don't read on.

I came to CC because It seemed like  a healthy forum of eating sensible and within a caloric range that is appropriate to the individual.  BUT IT ERRKS me to no end when people come on here and express their eating disorders. I DONT want to hear about it. I WANT to stay healthy, and I dont want to hear about how you are slowly killing yourself, please find another forum because the last time I read the RULES HERE... it states that this website does not promote an unhealthy lifestyle such as starvation to lose weight.

THERE! ..my rant...

you have a problem you can't stop feeling guilty unless you seek PROFESSIONAL. HELP. you are too far in over your head, i'm serious do it now before it becomes worse than it already is. no one with anorexia is a happy person. but i know getting help is way easier said than done, so you probably won't do it. but i'm telling you, that's the only way to make those horrible guilt feelings stop because they will help you understand why you do feel guilty and how to ignore those feelings. you may never be able to obliterate them but you can learn how to deal with them. you won't be able to do that on your own because you have that voice in your head telling you you're fat, you don't deserve to eat, eating is bad, etc. you won't be able to overpower that with reason, you need someone else involved.

do it or you're stupid.

i am both amazed and shocked that you are consuming 300 calories.

although being slim gets you to fit into nice clothings easily, you need to think about your health, both physical and mental...

perhaps you need to remind yourself constantly that -

1) eating what your body needs in a day is not a sinful thing at all

2) most food are tasty and that's how god made things are

so stop torturing yourself and live a normal and happy lifestyle!

feel happy alright? do stuff that can make you real happy!

You don't need to be losing any more weight.  You said you need to be in control, well maintaining weight takes a lot of control.  Though the number sounds high, 1200 calories really isn't a lot because that is what the body burns up regardless of exercise.  It will prevent you from going into starvation mode and destroying your metabolism.  If you continue eating such a low amount, your metabolism will be shot.  This means when you finally do start eating healthily, your body will have a harder time burning the calories which will lead to weight gain in the future.  Change your habits now to prevent setting yourself up for failure because you can't keep eating this little forever.   

You may feel hot this year in a bathing suit, but if you keep this up next year you will be far too sick to even get out of bed. 

It sounds like you have an eating disorder. Have you looked into getting help? You're health is to important to jeopardies. Being skinny is not attractive. Being fit and healthy is. If you don't eat properly you will do damage to your body. Think of food as fuel. Fuel  your body properly and get a healthy amount of exercise and your body will reward you. Please talk to someone.

Original Post by risza:

If you don't want to hear a rant, don't read on.

I came to CC because It seemed like  a healthy forum of eating sensible and within a caloric range that is appropriate to the individual.  BUT IT ERRKS me to no end when people come on here and express their eating disorders. I DONT want to hear about it. I WANT to stay healthy, and I dont want to hear about how you are slowly killing yourself, please find another forum because the last time I read the RULES HERE... it states that this website does not promote an unhealthy lifestyle such as starvation to lose weight.

THERE! ..my rant...

She's not promoting it she's asking for help. If you don't wanna read about it then don't click on a thread entitled "I only ate 300 calories today"

And by the way it's spelt "irks", NOT "errks"

Well said Cherry!

Hello!

I have similar stats to you, only I am about 5’5 (about 166 - 167 cm) and about 52.5 kilo’s (115 lbs)

I have had eating disorders, and from, experience, once people of our stats start losing below 114 lbs, 108 quickly becomes 105 which becomes 100 in no time.

Basically, it is a very easily to become severely underweight in a very short space of time for people at your current stats; I have been there, I know this.

I promise that your life will be no easier if you become even thinner; I was 100 - 110 for years up until this year, and I was actually less happy with my life then I am now, at a higher weight! Being “”thinner” does not make life any better, in fact you are likely to develop serious issues with food that rule your life and make it suck!

Again, we have similar stats, and I know what it is like to have disordered thoughts with food, so please MSG me any time you want to talk about anything. Counting calories and restricting can rule every aspect of your life if it gets out of hand, and you deserve to have people to talk to for support.

Your rant says more about you than it does about the poster.

This website offers help and support to people who are having issues with food.

The poster was in no way encouraging people to under eat. Your rant was totally inappropriate