Someone talk me into having a baby shower.
Alex and I have been discussing this baby shower crap for a few days because honestly, we really don't want one. We want to celebrate that we're bringing a little tax deduction into the world but the thought of "Don't Say Baby!" and that stupid toilet paper game, along with everyone wanting to rub my belly like it's a good luck charm and telling me the horrors of their pregnancies are kind of making me really anxious to lock myself in a room for the duration of my pregnancy.
Alex's brilliant suggestion was to do the same thing we did with our wedding: throw tradition out the window and have, you know, fun? That thing that most people forget about when they plan events meant for them but are allowing other people to barge in on their bar tab fund. He suggested going back to where we went for our awesomer-than-awesome wedding reception to have a "Moly's pregnant and wants cheesesteaks!" party, Hooters. I like the idea of rocking out at Hooters for a day with good company, but the thought of taking the attention away from cheesesteaks and boobies to focus on my gut is still making me hesitant.
So talk me into a baby shower, and don't mention that I get presents 'cause I don't want anyone to buy me a bunch of **** they feel is necessary to my child's development in colour schemes they enjoy that my spawn won't even be able to use until it's like, a toddler. Kudos to the dude who bought a walker for a newborn, now nobody can buy it for the first birthday party when the baby is actually closer to using it.
Oh, and I need everyone to chip in to send me PG as a congratulatory gift.
I think having a baby is pretty damn special. Maybe because I can't have one. *shrug*
I see it as a good way to get stuff to help with the baby, y'know clothes and diapers and the like. You may already have some of those things, but more the merrier. And if you choose to have another child, you'll have lots of them too! And when you're all done, you can donate them for other mom's in need or something.
Baby's may be born every day, but this is YOUR baby. =D It's extra special!
I suppose if I worked in a hospital and saw babies everyday I'd be pretty desensitized about babies, but I'd be pretty crazy over my own. Heh.
If you don't want one, no one will be offended. I wasn't offended, no one was as far as I know in my family, when my cousin said she didn't want one. She still got gifts though. =P She had a little girl, so we bought her a little bag of cute baby clothes with different ages, so she can grow up into each one. Nothing crazy. She liked it (and didn't expect it so was extra surprised!).
True: Donating the shower gifts to mothers/babies in need is nice gesture. Most of the baby showers occur in the last trimester of the mother-to-be's pregnancy stage. At least most of those that I've attended. That gives you some time to consider the pros/cons,imo. There is not a fixed rule that I'm aware of according to showers. The presence of everyone who attends the shower is a supportive gesture.There's no reason you can't donate the shower gifts. :) Remind others: No gifts are needed. All gifts will be donated/etc.
btw: Remember you could always stage/coordinate/organize the whole shower yourself. Nobody has to throw it for you their way on their terms. Throw it yourself and you'll be aware of the events planned. It will all be within your comfort zone that way. :) Um. Throw your own untraditional bash for the baby? - Just a friendly suggestion. Do whatever floats your boat!
Original Post by trhawley:
If you and Alex are financially able to provide all of this stuff on your own then by all means skip the shower. Otherwise do it for your baby.
That's reasonable/sound advice,imo. :)
Personally, I love your attitude CD. Some people just AREN'T emotionally attached to their kid until they at least see it or hold it. In most cases it's the dad, but it can go either way. It's not weird, or natural. Technically it is a parasite isn't it? It is using your body to thrive and grow. People take stupid things way too seriously.
Have cheesesteaks. Oh god I love them. Hard to find a good cheesesteak in WA.
I am not sentimental and I am not traditional. I mostly enjoyed my pregnancy, more from a science fascination type thing.
Do it for your mother-in-law, otherwise if she's like mine, she'll make your life a living hell.
A friend of mine had a baby, and registered using onebabyregistry.com - she didn't put on specific items from stores, but indicated the types of things they needed, and encouraged "gently used baby items (your own, garage sale, thrift store, consignment...)"
Presumably she wasn't referring to gently used diapers....
That's the great thing about registering - you can request what you want, so that someone doesn't go out and spend a month's worth of diaper money on an adorable sweater from Baby Gap that will fit the kid for less time than the diapers would have lasted. Let your friends and family buy you gifts, but make sure that it's stuff that you (and the baby) will need.
Or you could ask for donations to the baby's college fund.
Now that I've gotten caught up on the outburst of responses, I'm:
A) Glad a few of you understand my point of view on this. Because I'm a girl and I'm carrying it for nine months I'm supposed to have some emotional attachment to it (aka falling in love with a pee stick as soon as I get a positive sign), however it's fine for the dad to not even like the kid until he gets to spend quality time with it. Alex and I have always taken opposite roles in our relationship. I make all of the money, I go to hockey games, drink beer, burp, fart, and eat cheesesteaks with extra grease with the guys. Alex stays home with his storiess, wears a frilly apron and makes gourmet little meals for himself while tending to the house. It only seemed natural for us to keep with the opposite roles on this baby thing. He's oohing and ahhing at every change to feel it move, to see it on an ultrasound, and to hear it's little heart beat. I'm plugging my ears and begging for as few ultrasounds as necessary.
B) We've been buying for this baby since before we even got pregnant. We have closets spilling over with diapers in various sizes in the brand I know and trust and have been stalking for good sales six months before there was something to put in them. My mom has been buying for it since I told her, and we have the future baby room stocked with unisex clothes, warm blankets, some deluxe spa bullcrap, toys, and cuddly things. The only thing we need at this point are consumables, because you can never have enough. More diapers, more burp cloths, more wash cloths, onesies, and socks, because even if you bundle them together you always manage to lose one by the time it makes it out of the dryer. We're buying the furniture after Alex gets the life insurance check from his grandfather's passing, within the next two weeks.
And if we managed to convince ourselves of having this party, that's all we were going to ask for with strict instructions not to get anything else because you think it's cute or necessary. If you go ahead and buy it anyway, guess what? Grandma Prebe probably already bought it and it's sitting in the baby's room or we're selling it on Amazon and buying liquor with the profit.
For now, we're focused on having the three births party, a chance for families and friends to get together and celebrate Alex turning 24, Moly turning 22, and the fetus being born a few weeks later. The boys can hang out at their table eating deep fried pickles and drinking beer, the girls can fritter over baby toes and what binky they thought was best at a different table, and then there'll be Moly, master of incubation, surrounded by Hooters girls and wrapped carefully in CAUTION: POLICE LINE DO NOT CROSS tape with the fattest cheesesteak you ever did see, extra curly fries, potato salad, and all of the pickles I can swipe from the guests when they're not lookin'. With PG propped up on a stool to my left, gruntin' and groanin' 'cause there's a beer on the table over yonder but her leash isn't quite long enough. Oh, the torture. You can feel the condensation on the tips of your fingers as you strain to reach over, but you can't quite grasp the glass because it's too slippery. Looks delicious, doesn't it, PG?
Yeah... ADMIRE FROM AFAR.
I love you CD.
You were so drunk, weren't you. xD
