Sometimes you guys all seem so perfect...

Maybe it's just me - but I've spent a lot of time reading the posts on this site, and it seems like some of you are doing everything 100% right all the time and never fall off the wagon. 

I know that some people have posted about binges or how they've eaten over their calories a few times.  But while I've done extremely well myself (always under 1300, except 4 times between 1300 and 1400 and once at 1750), my food intake over the past 2+ months has included fast food (taco bell twice, McD once, LJS once), and a couple days where I just snacked instead of having real meals (i.e popcorn and pudding instead of something healthier).

Then I read United's post this morning about excercise, and it seems like so many people are working out every day.  I've been averaging 4 times a week, but it's been more and less some weeks.

I'm not sure what my point is with this, other than to ask if I'm the only one that feels like I'm not living up to the perfect standard?  I know that everyone says they let themselves eat whatever they want so they don't have cravings, but then I also see people talking about how their percentages are 40/30/30, which I have yet to accomplish routinely, and how when they do snack it's just a bite or two.

I think maybe I'm just starting to wonder how some of you gained the weight that you are trying to lose, since you have all these wonderful habits developed now.

I sincerely hope this post doesn't come across wrong!  I am so impressed and proud of all of you that are doing so perfectly, I'm just befuddled I guess as to how you are able to.  I am absolutely not saying you shouldn't be, I am truly, truly impressed and wish that I could be as healthy.  Hopefully that makes sense!!

After being a fitness/aerobics instructor during college, I thought I knew it all! Then life happened; marraige, career, two children in a span of 14 months, and the weight gain, loss, gain, loss, until finally you feel like a balloon that's been inflated then deflated one too many times.

I totally feel your pain- sometimes you get so focused on your own imperfections, everyone else does seem perfect by comparison. Even people who do achieve their perfect nutritional state and manage to lose lots of weight have to find a way to stay there to avoid gaining their weight back... THAT'S where the work really begins...

So we all slip up! Otherwise we'd all weigh 100 pounds! So, yeah, the important thing is to free yourself from the pressure of being perfect, embrace your mistakes as learning experiences, and try to modify your worst habits first. After all, we're all trying to improve our quality of life and create and maintain those good habits...

hi

I agree completely. It does seem like many of us know what to do, so why are we overweight?

Just like anything in life, I suppose we are human. I dont follow my diet 100%. I am not a robot. It is a general guidline, that if followed perfect, would and should give excellent results.

I always try to maintain protien to carbs when i eat. This is done by buying food that is balanced. It has the info on the packages. Or, mix and match foods high in protien with those high in carbs to even out . This and never going over 1700 calories, and drinking my 8 glasses of water are the 3 things i consistently do.

Things i dont consistently do:

work out.

eat enough grams of protien per day.

eat at regular intervals.

So, i wont get 'perfect ' results. But its ok. We are all human.

steps up on her soapbox, clears her throat, and lets it rip...

I know the feeling, like all of the losers, people actually losing weight, are huddled in their victory corner while we weep quietly in our respective realities...

I would like to believe that they are our cheering section, but sometimes its difficult to look behind  to lend a hand up to the person still climbing that hill that was mastered with little effort.   It is overwhelming to wonder why it is so easy for them to succeed, meanwhile you are still strugging.   But frustration should be your key, It should be that frustration that motivates you to make those necessary changes to have a better life, body, and over-all sense of being, and it's what I strive for everyday.

I am going to accomplish what I have set out to do, but this site has been a great motivator in my success.  I believe that everyone falls, and that in mind, I have been able to see everyone on here as an equal in this battle of wits and will.  Hopefully we all get perfect at this! Then all of our goals will be achieved and we wont need this site anymore! (lol, just joking eric!) - you know what I mean, that we will simply use it as a guide instead of the strength we need to balance our lives.  I wish us all good luck in this battle and pray that our chances at "perfect" are doubled, so we all can achieve our dreams of health, beauty, and satisfaction.

*steps slowly off her soapbox, and into her sports bra, time to get moving...;)

I also hope I didnt offend anyone with this blog, it wasn't my intention, just my opinion.  Thanks for listening.

amanda

I understand what you are saying.  I read back thru all of these and even with my own posts it looks like I know what I am doing.  Well I may have the information but I am just now learning how to use it wisely.   I don't think it is easy for anyone.  I feel that being able to come on here and being accepted for you is what makes us all strong.  Weather you have  100 pounds to lose or 5 pounds the people on this board support you and encourage you. 

It does seem as if some people really have it figured out...  I guess I just dont stress on the perfection part of it.  I keep things simple try to eat healthy and eat the foods I like because after all it is a lifestyle change. I log my calories and I dont really strive for the perfect combination of carbs,fats, sodium ect.. I think its great that we have the tools to do this because I know there are people that need to monitor specifics for health issues.  The people on this site really motivate me to live a healthier lifestyle and dust myself off if I fall down and that is something I think I struggled with in the past.  I am definitely far from perfect...you should see my calories from yesterday... yikes.. And I know I need to exercise more. Given all of my imperfections I guess I feel as if i am still having success. I have lost 24 lbs since Jan 9. I am in it for the long haul and still have 70lbs to go.

Don't you think if everybody were perfect, there would be mayham(?) in this world.

I'm so far from perfect, I can't even see it with binocular's! But then everybody needs to be ecepted and every once in the made felt like they're not alone. This site is a goodsend ( you hear that Eric, Igor, Victor and the rest ) for some of us. I'm wondering how many people are in the backround, hiding, to affraid to voice they're concernes and questions, because they're wondering if they get taken the wrong way.

But anyway's I'm for one are happy (as far as I'm alowed to) for this site and that people in this world are alowed to be different and as imperfect as they come.

Gabi

Ok.  I want to say that you don't have to worry about your post offending anyone.  I think it is a matter of everyone shouting about success and whispering about the stumbles.

I am 31 years old.  Have always been obese.  One day, (January 3) i woke up and said.....i don't want to be 285 pounds.  I decided to do something about it.

I can tell you in the last 3 months I have had fast food numerous times......once i had it 3 times in one week!  I am not perfect at all.  The one thing that remains constant though has been the exercise. When i first started exercising boy oh boy......let me tell you it was painful.  I kept at it.  A person only NEEDS to exercise 3 times a week.  I choose to do some sort of movement for 30 minutes a day. For me i find it easier to move than to give up mcdonald's....hehe

Today, I hit my 30 pound mark!  The only other time I have hit this mark is doing Atkins......that's how i got to 285.....lol.  I credit exercise for helping me get this far.  It has now become a HUGE part of my life.

I want you to know that you brought up a good point......and i appreciate it being brought to my attention.  I am guilty of the same thing.

Good luck and remember......don't deprive yourself

I believe that those of us who have reached or are close to our goals are not trying to make others feel bad by sharing, but trying to encourage and say "hey this is what worked for me". 

I think it's all in the attitude.  If people feel bad or a need to be "perfect" there is always going to be something missing in your life.  I chose to do this to be the best me I can be - not to focus on all I think I don't have or could do better.  If I spent all my time doing that I'd never get anything accomplished.  As a result of taking a "winning" attitude, I feel better than I have ever in my life - and without all the pressure.  It' s not just about the weight loss, but the level of self-acceptance and pride that I have also acheived at the same time.

For those of us who share our successes and shout about it, we've earned it.  It wasn't easy for us either :).  I mean no offense, but just because someone has reached their goal doesn't mean the process was somehow less painful or stressful etc.  I think that is one thing we all share in common, we are all working to improve our lives and we have all felt pain and can lean on each other. 

Other than saying that I agree with the idea that nobody is perfect, I just wanted to add a couple of my own feelings.

Firstly, I find the posts from people who have been on the site for quite a while and have had great success an inspiration for the simple reason that they show that I am going generally in the right direction, no matter what.  It shows that this site isn't just one of those 'lose 11 pounds in nine days' scams (where you then get to put on 13 pounds in five days shortly after).  I have my definite triggers, which I have to deal with every day, and even though I've been successful for two months, the only reason I can do it on a day to day basis is the fact that I know it will lead to a better life and better health.

Another aspect is the theory vs practice difference.  Those people who give the right answers to genuine questions are not hypocrites if they don't live completely by those answers.  They are helping everyone who reads it.  Knowing the right way to live is better (generally) than not knowing, even if you don't do it.  It took me six months after first deciding to lose weight to really set what I knew into action, but if I didn't know where to start, I wouldn't have.

Just remember that everyone has their demons and everyone has something that they are fighting, or else they wouldn't be human.

Thanks for all of the thoughts and replies!

I do want to clarify two things though - just in case what I said was interpreted otherwise.

First, I love hearing the success stories!!  I think everyone has every right to post them, and I am thrilled for everyone who has done so well!  It's not those posts at all that I was thinking of when I typed this out.  I have posted them myself, and if this board wasn't around I'm sure it would be a lot harder for all of us to talk about stuff that our friends and family probably get tired of hearing.  :) 

Second, I think that I myself have been very sucessful so far - so it's not that I'm discouraged or that I think I need to be perfect.  (I've lost 22 pounds in two months, so I'm more than pleased with my own progress to date.)  I just get a little intimidated I think, because so many people seem to have 100% changed their entire lives, and I don't think I'm capable of that, nor do I want to even.  Which maybe makes me wonder if that means I will fail eventually, because I still want to eat the occassional junk food, and while I exercise, I'm not doing it every day. 

Maybe that makes more sense.  I hope so!  Believe me, I'm the last person that would want anything about this site to change, I love it just the way it is, it's been the best thing I could have found to help me along my journey.  I guess what Tamara said best sums up what I was feeling, that we have a tendancy to 'shout about success and whisper about the stumbles.'  Goodness knows I do that too, and it's the way it should be, no one wants to focus on the negative!  But it's definitely intimidating if you don't infer that there are stumbles for everyone.

I don't think everyone is perfect. I know I don't have the perfect percentage ratio of fats and carbs and proteins and I should probably work on that. But I know what you mean. I felt the same way when I first started! So what I did was pick one thing to improve. The first thing I did was to cut out junk food and fast food and try to stick to my calorie limit or under. Once I mastered that then I tackled exercising regularly. I might get around to changing my percentages but I'm just too lazy to work that hard. It's all about finding out what is important to you and what is working for you. You don't have to be perfect to lose weight. You just have to count your calories, drink your water and try to get in some exercise when you can. If you are losing weight, than you are doing it just as perfectly as the rest of us. :)

That is one of the great things about this site...one can express him/her self.   All of us...have a sm. part of us fearing that we will resort back to bad habits of eating.

However, this new lifestyle change might not mean that we give up everything....but change how often we eat out at fast foods or choices of food at the fast foods......or better yet  learn how to include those foods in our calorie allowance.

whereas, someone else might give up fast foods completely, another might give up sodas totally....another might give up desserts.

Another, might drink diet liquids, others might periodiacally have desserts....others might have only low cal. desserts.

So you are not perfect....but your lifestyle change is molded for you...therefore your diet....whichever works...is perfect just for you.

I can't do a lot exercises.....but I do frequent body movements...walking about the house, housework......etc......see it is not like everyone else....but it is perfect for me...

If that lifestyle is working for you...then you won't fail if you stick with it.

I hope you won't get discouraged.  We all have our challenges and have to meet them any way we can.

I'm unable to exercise (medical reasons) and I'm losing so slowly that some weeks it hardly seems worth the effort.  I try to remind myself that I'm not doing this only to lose weight.  I'm doing it to change my eating habits to healthy choices that will last me the rest of my life. 

I do understand what you are feeling.  There are times when I read a post about losing 3 or even 5 pounds in a single week because they work out like crazy and stick to their plan, and I wonder if I'll ever be able to tell you all that I'm almost at my goal.  I do hope that calorie ount.com is here for the 18+ months I expect it to take me to get to my first goal of 60 pounds lost.

Stay strong!
Claire

Oh boy...Lurleen is normal just like you.  I think what you are
seeing as you read are just part of each persons day.  Most of the
time we type about the good parts because it makes others smile. 
Sometimes we type about "binges" because we feel guilty about what we
have eaten.  It has took me from Dec until now to lose to my goal
and I have about one or two more pounds to go but I am still and always
will be in the "calorie game" it is going to take along time for me to
get used to the new way of eating less.  I didnt have alot to lose
like others here do/did but it was just as hard and just as hard to
keep off too.  I think we try for perfection but thats all we can
do try and be the most perfect you that you can be.  huggers

I'm just about the farthest thing from perfect there is. lol

I eat at fast food restaurants-I just really try to make the best choices I can.

I don't work out like a fiend, I prefer to go for a walk. low impact, and I get to enjoy the scenery as I go. If I'd chosen to make myself do the all out kick-yer-butt aerobics, I'd have quit week one. lol

while it's true that I haven't had any binges as yet, it's probably because I allow my weekends to be 'maintenance days', days I can have up to the amount of calories I'd need to maintain my goal weight.

all in all, I treat myself pretty well. which is really important if I want to make this the lifestyle change I need it to be to keep the weight off once I've lost it.

I gained weight because I stopped being good to myself. didn't exercise, ate too much food in one sitting, and didn't pay attention to nutrition.

now I treat my body the way it deserves to be treated. and it has rewarded me with weight loss. ^_^

Here is something to think about...I am one to tell of happy things and guilt feelings. I tell of my guilt to get it off my chest so that I dont give up, and I tell it here bc I know there are people who understand.

When I am on a roll, I tell of it for good reason too that has nothing to do with anybody here. It is positive reinforcement. I would not tell of every bad thing I do everyday, eating cookies, not excercising...but if I put the good things I am doing out there in writing for me to view again if I so wish, it reinforces that behavior. If I say I am doing something, then I feel like I have to keep doing it...that is probably the reason most people only talk about their positives...it keeps them motivated to keep on with what they are doing.

Perfection makes it worse.

If you force a drastic change in your eating habits right away, you'll just bounce back to eating stuff that's bad for you again.

I eat junk food sometimes. I could NEVER give up zingers for good. XD But I usually go for something better for me. Like protein bars. Not as much calories as a candy bar, and they fill you up for longer. Plus they actually have some nutritional value. And they help my chocolate cravings.

Yes, will power is necessary. But drastic changes never work. I've tried the whole "I'm going to stop eating so many carbs and give up sugar" before. It was torture, and when I was near a pizza, I'd devour the entire thing! With the mindset of "I don't think I'll ever get this again. Better make the best of it!" I figure . . . I won't do that to myself.

Like on Friday. I had a horrible lunch. Pizza that I forgot to blot the grease off of and three rather large sugar cookies, and some candy during the day. And I felt so bad for doing that afterwards. But I realized I shouldn't let that discourage me from trying to do well later. Because hey, I've already lost weight, and I feel better in general! Every healthy meal you do eat and every day you do exercise DOES get you a little farther down the road.

Good luck. :)

Definitely I'm far from perfect!  I go over on my calories like half the time, and have treats way too frequently -_- .  That's probably why it's taking me so long to lose the weight!  I think the important thing is that I stubbornly keep at it ^_^ .  If I find one approach isn't working anymore, I take a step back and look to see what I could be doing differently.  Currently I am trying to increase my protein without increasing fat, and to be more careful what I eat when eating out.  If that doesn't help, I'll try something else.  *shrugs*  It's a slow learning process ^_^ .