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My son is starving himself.

Today I picked my son up early from school to take him to lunch and run some errands. He is 17, 5'11" and 120 pounds. Yes, I have taken him to a therapist for that and other issues...she doesn't seem to see his skeletal frame as a problem. She wants to concentrate on other things.

At lunch, (and he had not had anything but WATER all day..this was 1:00 in the afternoon !) ordered chicken strips and fries and a coke. He did not finish the coke (I had two diet cokes in the time it took to eat) He ate three chicken strips and a few fries. I asked him to please eat a bit more. He ate another HALF of a strip. Left his plateful of fries....so....this is about 5:26 pm here, and he had possibly 350 to 400 calories so far for the day.

I do not know what to do. Wait until I need to admit him to the hospital? No one listens to me and I hate this struggle to get him to eat. (Yes, he looks at the calorie content of everything, and accuses me of trying to "make him fat"!)

He has grown three inches in the past five months, and has not gained any weight. He thinks he has stomach fat. (of course not...skin?!?!)

The last time I took him to the MD they did a thyroid test..and did not listen to me when I told them that OF COURSE his thyroid is fine..he will NOT EAT!!!

Help. Any ideas of what action I can take?

I think they're referring to posts in a different thread.

To the OP- I think the best thing you can do is be supportive, and it sounds like you're doing that to the best of your ability. Remind him that you're always there for him, no matter what. It might also help to find a therapist who prioritizes his eating problems.

Original Post by carmenxox:

.......??

mmmm kay, just one question: where did the accusations of being a homophobic come from? I deffinately didn't catch that...

Some of the posts no longer make sense in this thread as some posts had to be deleted. But let's not digress from the main topic ...

Hi there

I have had an eating disorder for 2 years now. While i do not live at home, my parents are very involved in my day to day life, as they are with my siblings.

Can i ask, are there foods that your son has no problem eating?? Does he stick to certain foods or does he eat prety much anything but jsut in small amounts?? If he will eat pretty much anything, try encouraging him to eat just another bite or two. Prehaps eventually he will be able to eat more.

If he wants to build muscle, why not buy him supplements. Not those gymic pills and potions but real nutritional supplements like a protein powder of some sort. Get him to add this to whatever he chooses to eat for breakfast. They not only have protein but most other essential viatmins and minerals he needs. If you add this into his meals he is currently eating, this is also added calories. He might just go along with it if he is that concerned with building muscle.

Another option would be to take him to a gym, talk to a personal trainer and get them to discuss with your son the importance of eating enough in order to build muscle.

As for the therapist not being concerned, maybe you need to change therapists. I have had a few over the years and i got alot worse in my behaviours when i was meeting with a therapist who i didnt click with or who didnt take mine or my parents concerns seriously.

One thing i feel i must say is, please dont give up on your son or those you are seeking help from. This has happened to me in the past month, my parents have accepted the fact that i may never get well and that i may die. Please no matter how hard things get, dont give up!!!!

Original Post by kayeanne:

Hi there

I have had an eating disorder for 2 years now. While i do not live at home, my parents are very involved in my day to day life, as they are with my siblings.

Can i ask, are there foods that your son has no problem eating?? Does he stick to certain foods or does he eat prety much anything but jsut in small amounts?? If he will eat pretty much anything, try encouraging him to eat just another bite or two. Prehaps eventually he will be able to eat more.

If he wants to build muscle, why not buy him supplements. Not those gymic pills and potions but real nutritional supplements like a protein powder of some sort. Get him to add this to whatever he chooses to eat for breakfast. They not only have protein but most other essential viatmins and minerals he needs. If you add this into his meals he is currently eating, this is also added calories. He might just go along with it if he is that concerned with building muscle.

Another option would be to take him to a gym, talk to a personal trainer and get them to discuss with your son the importance of eating enough in order to build muscle.

As for the therapist not being concerned, maybe you need to change therapists. I have had a few over the years and i got alot worse in my behaviours when i was meeting with a therapist who i didnt click with or who didnt take mine or my parents concerns seriously.

One thing i feel i must say is, please dont give up on your son or those you are seeking help from. This has happened to me in the past month, my parents have accepted the fact that i may never get well and that i may die. Please no matter how hard things get, dont give up!!!!

 

 I think and hope kayeanne...that you need to be the one to never give up. It kills me to read that your parents have accepted anything like that. I know I never could...no matter how bad it gets. Even if I CLAIMED I accepted it...I would be lying.

My son finally admitted at dinner this evening that he was HUNGRY. He never speaks much...so that was huge. I try not to act too excited when he eats..but I am.  I make him protein shakes...and yes, if I can get a doctor to admit to me that my son is grossly underweight, maybe they can assign him a nutritionist.

But I know that no matter what l do...just like your parents probably have learned...that it's up to you. It's your body and your life. We only just helped you into the world. We hope you stay in it with us.