My son's father is the only one who will keep it real!

Hello. (a little bit about me) I am 23, I had my first child(and only child) when I was 21, before becoming pregnant I weighed 150lbs, some may say still over weight for my bmi but I was content at 150lbs. Well 2yrs later...I never did drop that "pregnancy weight" I weighed in at 185lbs that was 2 months ago. I recently gained another 10lbs and now I weigh 195lbs. My son's father thought I was pregnant again...

I took a pregnacy test last night to confirm that I wasn't. I go around pretending Im fine and I'm not. My son's father is the only one close to me that knows Im not happy. He offered for me to work out with him, but needless to say I've become embarrased by all the extra weight, I don't even look at my sons father that much anymore, so I cant work out with him. I work in an office so Im constantly sitting down. and I have absolutly no motivation or desire to work out. I really need some support.

I would like to become new and Diet and exercise without letting my family know that way don't have to worry about their negative comments and I can build my confiedence and the next time I see my son's father he could be impressed with me.

 

but WHERE and HOW do I begin??My eating habits are all screwed up Im mainly on the go and mainly eat out....Please give me some advise and previous experience..

 

thanks

tasha k- Indianapolis,IN

Im no pro but I would start by browsing this site, making your lunch a couple times a week instead of eating out, walking a little then walking more and more mostly I guess just keep calorie counting and making small changes. When your really ready you'll do it. Thats how it was with me.And you sound like a smiliar siyuation as mine Good luck youcan do it 

Begin at the beginning...keep a food log and see where you have been getting too many calories and too little nutrition.

Exercise should be a "four letter" word!! But we must move somehow. I work at a desk all day too...but I statred walking...just 20 mins at first, now up to 45 mins.

One step at a time, one meal at a time, one day at a time. Make small daily goals for yourself. The embarassment will fade with time, and you will feel better about yourself. Be kind and patient with yourself.

My doctor recommended weight watchers but, since I don't think the point counting program is as good for me as seeing the actual # of calories a food has, I like this site.  You can still use weight watcher diet plan suggestions to get the right idea on what is best to eat. 

Once I hit 30, my otherwise normal body weight began to go up... as I went to better paying jobs sitting in an office my activity level went down.  I went from 135 at age 27 to 185-190 at age 38.  I have never had kids but, often think "what would my 5'3" frame look like if I had.  It's scarey! 

I also have a pinched sciatic nerve that inhibits my ability to move around.

All I can say is that before joining this website and logging in my food intake, I had no idea!  I have obviously been consuming way more calories than I imagined in order to have gained this much.  My eyes are now opened and my mouth is closed.

Good Luck to all!

Obviously this is a very personal and private issue for you, so until you want to, there's no reason to tell anyone anything other than you're trying to eat a more balanced diet and set your child an example of how to eat right.

Use the tools on this site to find your basic burn rate.  Click the tools tab and then the burn meter.

You do not have to exercise to lose weight. While exercise is highly recommended  for your overall health and will help you to lose weight, you do not have to exercise in order to lose weight.  There are also many forms of exercise that go unrecognized, including chasing after a toddler and doing housework.

You will want to make sure that you adhere to the following guidelines as best you are able: 

1. 1200F/1500M minimum daily calories without exercise.  There are exceptions to this but the vast majority of people do not meet them.  If you think you are an exception, then you should probably go under a doctor's care while you figure out how your body does work.
2. Keep your deficit between 500-1000 calories for 1-2 lbs per week.  If you don't care how rapidly you lose or feel especially hungry, then eat closer to your burn rate.
3. Eat healthier foods, whole grains, lean proteins, fruits, vegetables.
4. Don't skip eating because you splurged one day, instead eat a lighter meal

A sample of 1200 calories:

200-300 breakfast (oatmeal and a banana, toast with a glass of milk)

100 morning snack (apple and a few nuts)

300 lunch (frozen entree)

100 afternoon snack (granola bar)

400 dinner (chicken breast with brown rice and a side of veggies)

 

 

its only noon so far so good, but I suppose I didn't realize u can rack up calories real quick so for the rest of the day I really have to be wise in what I eat...And I will limit myself to 2cups of coffee perday and HOT green tea or water (I LOVE my soda pop so Im going to give that up all together, I heard if u cut out ur pop, u can also see a big difference as well)

Im going to try and weigh my self once a month(same day of the month) I wont do that until the end of the month...so I cant wait to see even the slightest decrease will motivate me more!lol Tasha

Here is a great post by one of our moderators to summarize the "CC diet":

http://caloriecount.about.com/forums/post/122 30.html

This method works.  Keep coming back to the forums for great tips, recipes, and motivation!

Welcome to CC! 

When you first start out keep the stress out of the exercise by just walking. Start out walking 15 minutes a day. After a few weeks, add 5 minutes. Once you get a bit more motivated you can start increasing your distance too.

Definitely cut out the pop. That will be a major achievement cuz it's going to be hard at first. Stick with it, read lots of inspiring posts on c-c. Teach your body and mind to like water, again, this will be a slow process, but stick with it.

Once you set your mind to losing weight and getting healthy, you will want to eat healthy stuff too. Take things slowly, not taking on too much at once. You want to feel motivated and in control, not overwhelmed.

Good luck and keep posting :)

I like mint tea and coffee with soy milk instead of the pop although I do occasionally go for a diet soda.  I also drink water, but not as much as I probably should.

Great snack ideas:

Fiber One cereal, Fiber One cereal bars, apples, bananas, veggie burgers w/ mustard.

I think you have to start slowly. Start by changing your eating habits first, then move onto exercising. I had the same problem. I got pregnant and gained almost 100 pounds!!! I was 210 when I gave birth to my daughter and almost a year after she was born I was at 185. I finally decided I needed to do something so I changed what I ate. I didn't eat fast food, I cut down on snacks and sodas. In fact, I eliminated all snacks and only drank diet soda. What I liked were the lean cuisines, they are only between like 200 and I think the most calories I had was maybe 400 in one. So, for breakfast I would eat some fruits or something and maybe a little bit of yogurt. Have a lean cuisine for lunch and a salad and soup for dinner. If I went out, I immediately asked them to half my order and only bring out half of whatever I ordered, then I saved other half for dinner or lunch the next day. My usual rule is, whatever is normally being served, only eat half or one third of it. Drink plenty of water or low cal fluids so you will feel full. Then I guarentee just on diet alone you will shed pounds. I lost 20 pounds by changing my diet alone, I lost another 30 by joining the gym. At first it was hard and I had to force myself to go. Now I LOVE the gym. Its like another addiction. But instead of food its working out and it shows. I'd start off going maybe a few times a week, then buildup to a full fledged "gymmie". Anyway, it just takes time. It took me about one year to lose a little over 50 pounds. But I feel great. I know its hard to say who cares what other people think when you go to the gym and what not, but you just have to go and not worry about all the other people who are there.

Tasha,

 I think you are on the breaking point.  I would listen to these people... start small, don't change everything so dramatic all at once.  In the beginning I was  198 lbs.  I just stopped eating fast food.  Very simple.  And I lost 6 pounds in a month and a half.  Made a point to take time to prepare my lunch.  Then it became habit.  It wasn't long before I changed other things too.  Pick one thing at a time, this way you won't feel overwhelmed...  and it has helped me to not feel guilty when I fall back on a small pleasure like eating a bit too much ice cream... I don't feel horrible because I have taken small steps to get to where I am, that one *more* tiny scoop of ice cream won't put it all back on...  :o) 

 

you can do it...  it takes a bit to get the mentality.

 

 

 

Tasha,

I have family in Indianapolis well Brownsburg.  I used to live there myself on the westside.  I agree wit fibfauna take small steps.  The best way to cut out soda/pop is to replace one a day with water for a week then replace two a day with water, etc until you have completely eliminated it.  This avoids having that withdrawal affect and the feeling of being deprived.  It works to take small steps and change one thing at a time.  Be willing to try new veggies in the grocery store and look at various ways to prepare them.  Some good fats to use during cooking is Extra Light or Extra Virgin Olive Oil, Sesame Oil, Peanut Oil, and Soybean Oil.  These are all oils you can saute veggies up in that are good fats and good for you.  I didn't use to like onions or bell peppers but now I can't live without them.  As you change your tastes will change and you will adapt.  If you are wanting to avoid processed foods which can be detrimental to your diet then when grocery shopping stick to the outside perimeters this is where your fresh produce, meats, veggies, diary, and bread products are.  

I love the green giant steamed veggies because they are convienient to take to work with you and quick and easy.  Just pop them into a microwave for about 4 minutes and you have two servings of veggies for around 100 - 130 calories.  Lean Cuisines are reasonable as well but watch the sodium content because a lot of them are high in sodium.  This is where the frozen veggies and steamed veggies come in handy because they balance it out with very low sodium.  Canned veggies and soups are very high in sodium as well which will make you retain water.  You want to only have as a female no more than 2,500mg of sodium and this can be difficult because everything has sodium in it.  Small steps and if you need support or just need to talk because you are having a bad day don't hesitate to private message me or add me to one of the messengers.  You can add me as a friend if you would like and I will add you back.  My highest weight was 297 and currently I weigh 202.  I have been on CC for about 13 months and have been on some medications that will make me gain weight so it has been a long struggle but it is worth the journey of becoming a healthier me. 

I HATE diet colas but other diet drinks don't taste as bad. Diet Sprite tastes pretty much like regular sprite to me, for instance. Diet orange and root beer aren't too bad. And Diet Peach Snapple Iced Tea is delicious!

Experiment until you find a diet drink you like, then live on it. For me it's diet sprite (that kind of Snapple isn't available in Canada, boo hoo).

this is VERY useful information,...do u know I been asking that question for years...HOw many calories is in a pound?? THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU for answering that!

   NOW when ur counting calories can u eat wat u want as long as  u stay within ur limit- bcause i been eating wat i want with-in my calorie limit and at end of day i exercise and burn  about 3-500 calories

 

thanks

tashak

When deciding what program is right for you, you need to clarify you goals.  While many of us are quick to state a desire number on the scale or size of pants we would like to fit into our goals really should be broader.  Good health and longevity are good goals but what do they really mean.  The American Heart Association has found that 30 minutes of moderate intensity cardio vascular exercise a day will help prevent heart disease and diabetes.  Studies also suggest that resistance training to strengthen muscles and bones can prevent many of the problems associated with aging.  So it seems to me that working up to a fitness level that allows for 30 minutes of daily cardio and 2 to 3 weekly resistance seasons would be an appropriate way for most people to start.  Then, if you are also interested in losing some weight, you need to quantify your daily calorie burn and current daily calorie intake.  I recommend starting with you intake by logging everything you eat and drink over a week or to on this sight.  Then study the results to see how many calories you are eating on average and how your nutrients break down.  Do you have a proper balance of carbs, protein and fat?  Are you eating too much saturated fat?  How much sodium do you consume?  Are you drinking enough water?  Are you hungry between meals?  Once you?ve made the necessary adjustments that insure proper diet you should compare calories out to calories in.  You need to have a deficit to lose weight.  Ideally you would have a deficit of 500-1000 calories a day.  At this point if you don?t have a deficit, unless you eating more than 2000 calories a day, you don?t want to eat less you want to burn more.  Up your daily cardio to as much as 1 to 1 ½ hours a day if necessary but don?t cut back on the resistance training.  Once you are steadily at a deficit you will lose weight.  When you reach your goal back off the cardio so that you can maintain your healthy weight.  Continue eating healthy and doing both cardio and resistance so you can live a long and healthy life.

This too is useful. I have started working out. I did cardio for 30-45 min walked around my block for 10min and played basketball before turning in....

my calorie for my bmi is suppose to be around 1553...Im trying to stay with-in that limit....but I do Find my self Hungry between meals!

 

Can u eat watever u want as long as ur within ur calorie limit??<----if u can answer that u would also make my day

 

 

thanks

tashak

Tashak,

Well, losing weight is a basic matter of burning more calories than you consume, so I suppose that you could eat nothing but , say, pop tarts, until you reached your limit and still lose weight, but that's not exactly healthy.

CC is about healthy weight loss, and the best way to do that is to have a balanced healthy eating plan that includes vegetables, protein, healthy fats, and carbohydrates to insure adequate nutrition. 

If you're hungry between meals, then there are certain things you can do:

Eat higher fiber foods

Spread your meals out into frequently spaced smaller ones

Eat more lean protein

Drink more water

And so on.  You can get a lot of tips by continuing to browse the forums.

I didn't exercise last night....My son's father told me to cut bread out of my diet...

I don't know about that bcause Im thinking about going on the Subway Diet...^6in mini sub for lunch and a 6in sub for dinner. Anyone ever went on the subway diet?? I figure if I do the subway diet and eat my eggs for breakfast and do my exercises I should see some kind of result.

 

thank u all for posting~truly is a motivation for me~I don't get this kind of love at home lol

Subway Diet? It's expensive and not very satisfying, i.e. not very maintainable. Honestly, you're better off buying the ingredients yourself and making sandwiches at home, if you really want to live on sandwiches (they get repetitive). Since you're on the go so often, you will need to get good at planning and preparing food in advance, and bringing it with you. I find the little "tupperware-like" containers from ziploc are handy because they approximate one cup (snack size) and two cups (small size). Of course, on the days when you just can't get it together before leaving the house (I have those too), Subway will indeed be your best friend. A 6-inch turkey or ham sub, without cheese, and with mustard instead of mayo, is less than 300 calories.

I'd advise simply counting calories using CC and enjoying a variety of healthy foods. If you overdo one thing, you might get to the point where you can't even look at it anymore. But if you stock your house with fresh fruits, veggies, lean meats, whole grain breads (diet bread if you must!), lowfat dairy, etc.. you will naturally eat those foods and your health will thank you. So will your son's, for that matter. Don't buy junk food "because he's used to it" - it's the sort of thing he needs to get NOT used to anymore, if you know what I mean. His health and habits are on the line here, too. (Skinny kids eating junk turn into obese adults eating junk).

Cutting an entire food group out of your diet doesn't make sense. You can switch the empty-calorie white bread for some nice whole grain bread, and make sure you don't eat the whole loaf... but I promise you that as soon as you "can't have" a basic food you love, you will CRAVE it until you cave in and eat a lot of it.

I have found 1500 calories a day to be livable. You would definitely lose weight on that. And you need to make sure that you're not just "white-knuckling" it... that you actually feel calm and reasonably happy with the process (i.e. that it's a life change, not a temporary means to an end). And yes, you can eat what you want as long as it is within the calorie limit. However: you must be careful to measure the portions, read the labels, and keep in mind that 1500 calories of unhealthy food will NOT keep you full for the day, and you will wind up going over the limit. For 1500 calories to be filling, you need to eat at least 1000 of them in the healthy stuff, sometimes more.  Usually I wind up eating 1300 healthy/200 crap, or sometimes 1200/300. If I go under that ratio, I tend to overeat because I'm still physically hungry.

Thank u for answering my 2nd question TRUST- I been trying to eat good; but Im not in charge of the shopping of groceries my Mother is and she will not take any special request from me (if I wanted her to pick something up) but I been eating some bad things but I make sure I do not go over 1553 calories.

I seen so many delicous foods, and smelled so many tasteful things this week! This is going to be a Challange---so as far as my calorie count goes....So far so GOOD.

 

TashaK

If you have the money to buy Subway, you have the money to pick up a few things at the store on the way home. ;)

1553 is a fine, doable calorie goal. Good luck!!