Standards of Beauty

Growing up, my dad always told me I looked like a greek goddess.  I hated it.  The greek statues of women I had seen looked NOTHING like what the media says is beautiful....thin, big boobs, big eyes, small nose, large lips, etc. 

I was always a little overweight growing up and that left me with fairly low self-esteem that I still struggle with today.  In college I started yo-yoing with my diet and exercise.  I would work hard, probably eat too little, lose weight, get frustrated because it was so hard, and gain it all back.  It was a vicious cycle that just made me feel worse and worse about myself. 

Within the last year, I have really focused on being healthy: lifting weights, running, eating better, and being happy.  Now that I am healthier, stronger, and pretty much the same weight I have been for the last 5 years, I am finally starting to accept my body for what it is.  I am not skinny and I don't want to be skinny.  I am strong, have curves, and imperfections that make me ME. 

Now that I can look at myself without imediate harsh criticism, I realize that I DO look A LOT like the greek statues.  I may not be "beautiful" according to current standards, but I'm a freakin' goddess.  Take that, Angelina Jolie.

So, tell me how you are unconventionally beautiful.

I really like this post, but have no answer for you. :)

I look just like this only with a bigger schlong.

I am unconventionally beautiful because if I don't pluck my eyebrows I resemble Frida Kahlo a little bit but there are days where I think being natural is really hot and I don't pluck them. :D

All my features are big: nose, eyes, and lips...

and I got a big round face as well :/

Original Post by jblarghp:

All my features are big: nose, eyes, and lips...

and I got a big round face as well :/

You're so cute!!!!!

Jb: You have the classic features of the Italian Renaissance.

I've always been insecure, because I'm not like any statues I've ever seen...Or paintings for that matter.

I have cupid bow lips, but no strong cheek bones, huge eyes or a strong profile because of a straight strong nose.

Nah, I got a smushed up button nose :[ And I used to hate it...

Now, it fits me. I'm not happy with my body, but not because of it's shape, because of it's size. I know when I get smaller I will be healthier and thus, happier. My knees won't hurt as much when I run, for example.

I'm not what the media considers GORGEOUS, but I know I wouldn't be happy if I was only liked for my looks either...I'm pretty content with how I turned out overall :)

I'm a Rubenesque beauty - smallish boobs for my frame with a big, soft butt and belly. 

But I do have an hourglass figure, and I look fantastic in old fashioned costumes (such as medieval dresses, etc).

I thought for many years that I looked different than the norn only because I was overweight. I was actually quite a pretty fat girl, IMO.

But now that I am losing weight and becoming more a normal size, I realize my face is really unconventional in general. I have a tiny cupid-bow mouth, small jaw, turned-up nose, no cheekbones to speak of and eyes too big for my face. But it works for me, I am ok with that! It just kind of weirds me out when I see myself in pictures with other people....they look normal, I look like a muppet. Or maybe a cupie doll. And lord knows I will always be a big ole pear shape, so I've learned to find the beauty in that too.

It takes all kinds, though...Julia Roberts is touted as a great beauty, but my bf doesn't see the appeal and thinks my kind of beauty is way better. He's always had a thing for cupie dolls I guess.

I LOVE unconventional beauty. Really, to be honest, I can find absolutely anyone beautiful in some way - I have yet to find someone who I can't find something beautiful about (and yes that's physically, I don't even need to get to know them first). But yes of course when you add the dimension of personality it is even more pronounced... I do have a particular penchant for things that make people "unique". Like a facial scar, or slightly wonky teeth, or funky eyebrows... I find these kinds of traits much more interesting than the "conventional" norms.

To the OP - it's so inspiring to see you embracing the greek goddess within. You are approaching health and self acceptance in such a positive light. I hope I can follow in your footsteps someday. Good on you girl :)

And to everyone else who has posted - you're all beautiful! You really are :)

Original Post by ninafish:

I LOVE unconventional beauty. Really, to be honest, I can find absolutely anyone beautiful in some way - I have yet to find someone who I can't find something beautiful about...

Does that include yourself? Because it totally should

My dad is Maori and my mum is English, so I have olive skin with greeny/grey eyes. Even people in my home country often ask where my parents are from, which I happily take to mean that I look kinda unusual. My eyes seem to change colour with my mood - I had an ex who was convinced my eyes were greenest when I was mad!

I also like that my mum and dad had 4 kids, and because of all the DNA-mixing going on we all came out slightly different colours (one of my brothers and I are fairer; my sister and other brother are darker).

I have my fair share of scars. My biggest is a scar on my leg from where I was stabbed once (was running with a bad crowd); then there are the scars on my back from constantly rubbing my spine on things when I was very underweight. I don't see the scars as beautiful, but as reminders of how far I have come. I tend to appreciate my body right now for being functional. It's good for moving, eating, sleeping, running, loving - does everything I need.

I've always wanted to be everything that I'm not. I have curly hair, I wanted straight. I have green eyes, I wanted brown (I remember getting upset every time i heard "brown-eyed girl"!!). I'm average height, but i want to be taller. I have dark brown hair, but I want blonde. I could keep on going.

But lately, I've been able to look at a picture of me and say "DAMN. I look good!" haha. I like how I look now and I wouldn't change it. This is my face, my body, and I can either choose to accept and love it, or I can mope about it. I choose the former :)

edited to delete.

Original Post by jblarghp:

All my features are big: nose, eyes, and lips...

and I got a big round face as well :/

Jb, if that is your picture, then I have to comment. Your face is not round at all. It is the classic oval. Can't tell if you have a big nose, cuz the picture is not a profile. I looked at the other pics in your profile and you do not have a big nose. It is proportionate to your face. Your eyes are beautiful, I wouldn't exactly classify them as big. Your lips are full, but not big.

What's sad is that this is a classic example of a woman who does not see herself as she really is. I read somewhere years ago that most women do not see themselves as they really are and most underestimate their looks.

I have a unique skin tone. I don't sunburn, and in the summer I tan to a copper-y color that defies all make-up companies : )

I'm told I have very sensual lips (sometimes in more crass ways than I can state here). I can't wear lipstick without looking like a... 'woman of the evening'

My eyes change color. They are hazel, but can look very brown or very green on different days.

While my chubby cheeks aren't my favorite thing, I love my one dimple, and the fact that most people have two dimples or none.

Original Post by moonikins:

Original Post by jblarghp:

All my features are big: nose, eyes, and lips...

and I got a big round face as well :/

Jb, if that is your picture, then I have to comment. Your face is not round at all. It is the classic oval. Can't tell if you have a big nose, cuz the picture is not a profile. I looked at the other pics in your profile and you do not have a big nose. It is proportionate to your face. Your eyes are beautiful, I wouldn't exactly classify them as big. Your lips are full, but not big.

What's sad is that this is a classic example of a woman who does not see herself as she really is. I read somewhere years ago that most women do not see themselves as they really are and most underestimate their looks.

 I think in my case certain insecurities stem from childhood.

My mom and I have about the same sized lips (different shapes though), and she hates hers so much she puts cover up over them. I've been seeing her do that since I was little, so it probably affected me to some extent.

My lips have actually grown on me. My big round head, not so much. That's interesting that you see it as oval though.

Original Post by jblarghp:

My lips have actually grown on me. My big round head, not so much. That's interesting that you see it as oval though.

 That's because it *is* oval.   

Original Post by susiecue:

Original Post by jblarghp:

My lips have actually grown on me. My big round head, not so much. That's interesting that you see it as oval though.

 That's because it *is* oval.   

+1

I really like this thread, as a less-classic beauty myself.

Just wanted to commend all the ladies for seeing that beauty isn't necessarily standardized, though that message is continuously force-fed to us.

I like the OP's focus on becoming more healthy and not necessarily smaller. What level-headed ladies!

I'm totally jumping on the unconventional beauty bandwagon... lol. This really is a nice thread. Everyone always says I have really weird taste, but "unconventional" is much more accurate.

I'm not exactly an unconventional beauty, though. Or a beauty at all really. Although, I've gotten opinions on each end of the spectrum, I'm pretty average, actually. I've always been super comfortable with my looks, though. It could've been a lot worse. lol

What I do love about myself, though, is a bit of a chameleon quality. I look different all the time. Not even on purpose. Even the slightest change in hairstyle or makeup or whatever and I look like a totally different person. I've had a lot of issues with my ID and whatnot. lol. That may not sound appealing to some, but I enjoy the versatility.

Also, I have the kind of face that can pull off pretty much any glasses (sun or otherwise) or hats. Both of which I love, so again... lucky me! lol