Starting Over...again!

I was here over a month ago and I thought I was doing pretty good...then I found myself not caring until today.  Well...I guess I cared, but not enough to do anything about it.  I had lost 7 pounds, and now I am almost back to where I started more than a month ago.  So I am here again...ready to try to stay on track...ready to give it another shot...ready for the kick in the pants I need to finally lose this weight.  I am 217...I want to be 140.  I weigh almost 40 pounds more than I did when I wa 9 months pregnant with my son anf it bothers me.  Why can't I do this?  Why don't I have any willpower?  Will I ever be successful?  Thanks for letting me vent this morning.  Now I have to go out and get my food ready to take to work...and stop for an iced tea on the way?  Oh...does iced tea count as part of your water for the day or is it separate?  I know Crystal Light does not count, but I was not sure about the tea.

Thanks!
Tami

Because you don't want to do it. ?
If you really want something you can do it, no matter how hard it is, but it takes balls!

I had wanted to lose some weight for a long time. Did the usual diets that everyone else did. Took the pills, drank the shakes. Up and down, diet and no diet. But there comes a time when, you just want to do it because you HAVE to do it.

That moment came for me a few months ago. And instead of fixating on losing weight, I wanted to start exercising, eat well and just be happier with myself. I don't know if anyone else have had these 'breakthrough moments'. But sometimes, something just triggers in you - like something has flipped the switch. And from then on, it becomes EASY - because you want it so bad.

Thank you dhm for giving me more proof that I am not the only one struggling with my weight and losing it.  I have tried diet after diet and I seem to fail on every one.  I want to do it, but sometimes the willpower seems to evade me.  I am just going to take it one meal at a time and hope I can keep going.  I am a binge eater as well as an emotional, stress eater so it is hard for me to keep going.  Thank you for sharing.

As for seraph, you make me want to quit this site so that I never have to see advice from you ever again!  You did nothing for support or motivation but did manage to make me feel useless for failing.  I know that I am not the only person to struggle with eating...I am not the only person without willpower...if dieting and losing weight is so easy for you, you ought to be helping others instead of making them feel worthless for not being able to succeed the first time they try.  This is the hardest thing I have done in my adult life and I struggle...but this site is supposed to be for advice, motivation, support, etc...not for someone like you to make someone like me feel less than worthy because I can't get on the wagon and stay on all the time without faltering. 

I doubt that I will posting anymore...I can't handle the knock down when I am already trying as hard as I can.

Tabby,

Please do not let anyone discourage you. I can relate to how you feel right now, Read my journal and some of my posts for further proof. I have added you as a freind and hope you choose to stay. Start your journal and stick close to your friends for a while. It will get better. PS I struggle daily with my weight and my self image. I do know I will never be perfect, but that is okay, I can be me and someday be happy with it.

Julie

Tabby Just remember you are here to get healthy... don't let anyone discourage you. I agree with Julielet.. start your journal and stick to that if you want... but don't give up!  There are plenty of us around here that will give support and need support!

I've started and failed at dieting many times...and yet somehow this time feels a little different. Maybe because I'm trying something different and because I realize that this is a process that will take dedication. You must not give up. You can do this. You just need to find out what makes you fail, and what will help you succeed. For me, huge appetite, plus stress eating, plus carbohydrates plus couch potatoing= failure. The solution? Alter my eating patterns to where I can eat every couple of hours, I can eat as many veggies and  raw fruits as I want, get plenty of lean protein, and cut out sugar and refined starches entirely, which make me moody and binge prone and set me up to fail. I have 94 pounds to lose, and I'm not giving up. You're not alone in the fight, so keep your chin up and look forward to making your goal!

I like this quote from Batman begins-

"Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up."

w/r/t counting tea as water intake - it's my understanding, and someone correct me if I'm wrong, that since caffeine is a diuretic you cannot count it at a 1:1 ratio.   (I'm sure there's a formula out there that I'm far too lazy to find)  I have a friend that has to force himself to drink water.  He does the following:
Chugs 16 ounces after waking.  Drinks 8 oz after every trip to the bathroom and with every meal. 

Other dieting advice - Eat 5-6 times a day.  Not only is it better for you, when you never have the hunger pangs, it's easier to remain strong when faced with temptation.

You act like a victim! And trying to blame me.
Please grow a backbone, you made the topic, you have to be willing to let others express their opinion.
My reply really wasn't that bad, maybe you're just looking for something? Attention, sympathy, a buckload of sugar down your pants, not getting it from me.
Now if you want to quit and run away crying please do, I won't stop you, and I won't feel sorry for you if you do.

"So I am here again...ready to try to stay on track...ready to give it another shot...ready for the kick in the pants I need to finally lose this weight."
"Thanks for letting me vent this morning."

Seraph - did you even skim her post before you set about your day of trying to be the most antagonistic person on the forum (CONGRATS - you did it again!)

Thank you, now bow down for me.
I read it, it was full of excuses.
She wanted a kick in the pants she got one.

easy tiger... :)

Tabby - you just have to make up your mind.  It's like smoking - many people quit 7 or more times before they find the formula that works for them.  Perhaps you just weren't ready to make the sacrifices or to give up what ever it is food represents to you. 

I am certain that if you stick with it and try to find people like yourself, you will have the support you need and you will find a healthy replacement to make you feel wonderful about yourself. 

In the end, it is up to us - and I can tell you from experience, once you succeed in one thing, one goal you set for yourself, it is empowering and you will be able to tackle anything!  :) 

I would love it if you would journal - I prefer to talk to people that way as most people understand the journals are a place where, if you were raised correctly - you conduct yourself with manners as you would if you were a guest in that person's home.  :)  Unfortunately, when you discuss personal stuff in public places, you bump into all types - as you would in a line up at your local grocery store etc.  Welcome back!!

 ..

If you treat it like a chore you'll find it a chore. It doesn't have to be. Plan your meals out in advance. Easier if you cook most of your own but possible even if you don't. Don't ban any thing. If you like something eat it but understand it'll mean less of something else.

Listen to the comments about eating multiple meals. Even if you aren't hungary. Force yourself to stop and eat. You'll find it'll help with portion control and will make it a little easier to deal with cravings.

Keep busy. Find something you like that is active and do it.

Variety. Keep changing what you eat and if possible what activities you do. Simple things like eating mostly what is fresh and in season.

OTOH like dhm1983 said. Some times you wake up and decide it's going to happen. For some of us until we get that wake up call it's hard to do the right thing.

I'm just now returning too.. back from June....ouch!

Tabby

I tend to have a lot of First days too. It doesn't mean you want it any less than any other person here. Everyone has to find their own way. In my opinion 1 day of more exercise and less calories is better than no days.

I don't know Seraph , she or he is intitled to their opinion, but I say don't ever give up and never let anything anyone says upset you...you are you and you have to do what is best for YOU.

Cece

Tabby, welcome back... we only fail when we stop trying... that said, I've succeeded to lose weight and have kept most of it off...but got a bit lazy and put some back on... so am now really trying to adjust my eating habits. 

Iced tea would count as water if it's decaf tea... 

Keep positive thoughts... "I can and will do this" ...

Some of the previous posts have some very good hints for you.  I found that processed foods and candy are my "triggers" so basically stick with whole foods: fruits, veggies, whole grains (brown rice instead of white), low fat proteins (fish, tofu, beans, and some meats and chicken every so often). 

Don't deny foods that you really enjoy... figure out how to make them lower calorie and enjoy that version instead.  Loosely plan your meals ahead of time.  And most of all stay with us here who want to help each other get healthy - both physically and mentally... body image and self-worth is such a mental issue.

Tabby:

I agree with all the positive posts, especially gert109. We only fail when we stop trying. (I think I will post that on my fridge) All of us have tried and tried again.  One thing that has worked for me in the past is to take it in steps.  Try changing a few behavioral things at a time.  Like no eating in the car, or in front of the TV,  no licking the cake batter bowl (I put soap and water in it right away). Pick things that will help you over the long run.  If you change these distructive behaviors it will have an effect on your daily intake and make you feel more in control. Think about the stress triggers, what stress reducing techniques could you replace eating with. Maybe taking a walk, calling a friend, logging on here.

You can do this. and its ok if today is a first day. Today is the first day of the rest of your life.

Have a great day.

Linda  

Tabby girl, I'm right there with you.  I just started Monday at 219 hoping to get to 150.  I've been up and down in weight so many times it's hard to count.  I find that the journaling and tracking your food and activities really helps to keep you focused.  I also have a very clear picture in my head of an outfit I want to wear when I've reached my goal.  I envision myself in it every day looking great and it helps to inspire me.  If you want, I'd be happy to be your weight loss buddy and we can share the journey together.