How to stop counting calories!!?? HELP!

I've been stuggeling a bit lately with overcomeing anorexia, I just can't seem to stop counting and stressing about calories! Even if I I don't count right away, within an hour my mind just naturally does it, I just can't seem to stop, and it's driving me crazy, i just don't weant to care anymore!
It's been hard for me to know how to get enough calories without getting to much.. (when I go over I freak out and workout like crazy or dont eat much the next day)

Does anybody have any advice on how to quite counting every calorie I consume, while still getting enough? And how to get the good nutrition I need?

~Thanks! :-]

sw:145 (down to: 98) cw:102 gw:115ish

First off, good job with your efforts to overcome your ED.  I too went through the same struggles.  Maybe try planning your food intake for the entire day and sticking to it....proper calories and all.  This way, you are not at risk of undereating and are still able to keep track of calories.  Then once your comfortable with eating a normal amount of calories daily, you can stop counting and eat normally.

Or maybe have your mom counting calories for you? That way you'll still get the calories and will not be counting them.

I agree with vanillaswirl that having someone else track them is your safest bet apart from tracking yourself. You don't want to undereat when trying to gain, that's for sure. I know how annoying and compelling calorie counting can seem though.

My mum has actually tried to ban me from counting calories!!  She says that my habit of scutinising every label when I buy food, coupled with my obsessive calorie counting whenever I eat and then stressing over it afterwards, has lead me to have problems with food, both mentally and physically.

I'm sorry, but I can't really add anything to what other people have already said regarding how to stop calorie counting.  I just wanted to say that I understand your frustrations and wish you the very best in over coming them.

Have you seen a counselor about your eating disorder? If not that would be a good place to start. You have already taken the first step and recognized you have a problem. Now you need to talk to someone trained in helping people in your situation.

a  big help to be honest would be to stop using a site for calorie counting. good luck and look after yourself.x

Along the lines of having someone else count for you, try to incentivize yourself not to count calories for the day by keeping track of what you eat (but not the amount of calories if you can help it!) and then totaling up your calorie intake at the end of the day, once you're completely done eating. I've found that this helps me trust myself a little more to eat a reasonable amount without counting the calories in everything I eat.  It takes a lot of self-control, but if you keep it up it's a great way to boost self-confidence and avoid under- (and over-!) eating. Another thing that might be helpful is to look at what you're eating in terms of food group - i.e. make sure you're getting plenty of whole grains, more fruits and veggies than proteins and dairy (but at least a serving or two of the latter!) and most of all not getting too many of your calories from fats/oils/sweets. Just moving away from a calorie-centric approach - even if you can't stop counting immediately - can help you feel more confident that you're eating a healthy diet and that you're gaining weight in a way that will nourish your body rather than just add fat. 

Good luck!!! :)

Original Post by littleshellys:

Have you seen a counselor about your eating disorder? If not that would be a good place to start. You have already taken the first step and recognized you have a problem. Now you need to talk to someone trained in helping people in your situation.

 Littleshellys, not sure if you are asking this of me or of the original poster.

But anyway, if it isn't directed at me then I apologise for the intrusion!  But yes, I am seeing a counsellor about my food problems.  I had my first session last month, and am due to see him again at the beginning of July for a follow-up.

In the meantime, he sent me away from the first session with a work-book to complete, with various written exercises to try and break down my thoughts, sort out various situations, etc.... all very involved and pretty intense, but nonetheless I do think he will be a help to me.

Thanks for respsonding to my post - if, as I say, it was mine you were responding to!

I'm having the same problem! What i'm trying to do is stop using this site! It really gets to me, and drives me crazy and I always count calories in my head now, and because I've used this site so much I know the calories in almost anything so it's not like I have to search every product before I eat it--I already know!

So I can see how it gets overwhelming and it's hard to eat more especially with an ED because your consumed by this calorie thing. But what I'm trying to do is to stop using this site and realize that just because things have more calories doesnt make them bad for you. There's good calories and then theirs bad. For example, nuts have sooo many calories but theyre so good for you! Honestly, it's about balancing the things you need in a healthy diet so you can have energy to work out and feel better about yourself. You can still eat healthy but eat till your satisfied and stop wondering how big your portion is or how many calories if you have a little more cause your still hungry. You have to give your body what it needs..and play a little catch up.!

what my Nutritionist told me was to plan/count my breakfast, lunch, and snacks, just to ensure I had enough calories (& had reached a certain amount), and then take a large helping of whatever my mom made for dinner (since I can never even begin to try and figure out the cals in that). now I find myself being more "spontaneous" with my lunch/breakfast/snacks as well, and not scrutinizing the calories. it's tough to completely break the habit, since the calories in some things are basically branded in my mind. but it's gotten easier & easier to loosen up and make choices based on intuition, or whatever you wanna call it.
or, on the other hand, if you really want to stop, then get someone else to track them for you. but just be careful that you don't start "sneaking" to find out what they're tracking. and also, don't let not knowing cause you to undereat in fear of the cals.

The best thing I ever did to help myself recover was stop logging on to this website.  I used to be here under a different name (started a new account because I have completely new life) and was OBSESSED with counting... even when I stopped logging calories here I still had to write them down. 

I finally came to the realization that this website just wasn't helping me... Instead of providing support it had become a crutch, allowing me to feed off others and pretend I was trying to recover when really, deep down I wasn't.  It also gives you a skewed sense of reality.  If you're on here alot you start to think that everyone on earth eats between 1200-1600 calories.  The majority of people (including very healthy, fit, thin people) eat more than that daily and maintain a healthy weight.

I stopped logging on and after a few weeks my head was in a competely different place.   I no longer had mini panic attacks about food and what i ate and what I was going to eat and whether or not I was going to gain weight or ever have my period again or be normal and be able to go to a restaurant without that clenching fear in my chest.. you get the point.

I'm 5'3" and went from a skeletal and revolting 85 (lowest) to 93 (weight when I stopped logging on) to my current, very healthy and beautiful weght of about 110.  I'm 30 and its the most I've ever weighed... and I LOVE it.  I have an **** for the first time!!! A year ago I thought that if I ever got to 110 I would be disgusting, but I can tell you that it isn't.  And to be honest most people can't even tell that I've gained any weight b/c I used to cover up how skinny I was with flowy shirts and drapey clothes. 

p.s. if anyone is wondering why I came back its because i occassionally have fitness questions and have found that the fitness people here give the best advice.  I rarely log on though - maybe once every couple weeks.

Sugurshocked, I have read your posts with great interest and all of what you have said I can really relate to - that feeling of obsession with calorie counting, panic attacks, worrying about every being "normal" again, etc... I have the same anxieties, especially if I get invited out to a restaurant or simply a family gathering for a meal.  A feeling of terror goes through me, and I sometimes feel as if I'm going to lose control of what I eat.  Infact, I absolutely hate eating in front of other people - it's something that I feel really uncomfortable with.

I was interested to read that you think visiting this website was hindering rather than helping you.  I guess it's a bit of a double-edged sword - you start coming here with the best of intentions, but after a while it becomes all-consuming and, as you say, it really ends up being a liability rather than helpful and useful.

Another point that I picked up on was when you said you thought 110 lbs would be disgusting.  I am nearly 40, 5 ft 4" tall and weigh 111 lbs at the moment - that's 7 st 13 lbs.  I have been given a goal of upping my weight by a whole stone, but I can't ever see that happening.  My personal goal is to increase by 1/2 a stone, but even that to me seems totally alien.  I can't ever imagine weighing 8 1/2 stones!  Like you said, it seems disgusting, and my main concern is if I so start to put weight on, will I be able to stop?  Everyone says of course I will because I'm very sensible and have never, ever been overweight at any time in my life.  But it's the fear of losing control that keeps on nagging me.

Well, enough rambling  for now - thanks again for your insightful and helpful contribution to this thread!

Much like someone else mentioned, the best way I learned to stop counting calories as much as I could was to be more spontaneous with what I ate.  The hardest thing I could ever do (and the best) was to eat things without knowing the calories.  For example, I'd go to a local bakery (NOT one like dunkin' donuts or Starbucks that you can look up the nutritionals) or cafe and get something there.  It could be a 12" Meatball Grinder or a Teeny Weeny Fat Free Parfait...you just won't know the calories!  Sure, you could guess all you want but let's face it..you really don't know..and it's LIBERATING to not know!!! The first time I did it, I woke up the next day realizing I was still the same person whether or not I tallied my calories or not. 

Start small, eat what's comfortable to you.  Then hey, have a field day.

Thank you so much everybody! :D

I still have trobles counting calories, but all your great advise had really made me think, thanks again!

Hi, I know that you posted this a little while ago but I thought that I would reply any how. I have a problem with counting calories too. I was anorexic for two years and then started having problems with bulimia. I've  found that counting calories is a major trigger for my binging because I start to feel really deprived as my calorie allowance for the day gets smaller and smaller with each thing that I eat. Anyways, calorie counting has been something that I've been holding onto for the longest time and I'm afraid to let go of it because it's a feeling of control for me but at the same time I know that there is no way that I can live the normal life that I want to if I don't give it up. I know most of the nutrition labels on the face of the earth by heart ( embarassing haha) so I've decided to find healthy recipies that I can make in a batch and keep in the fridge and use as staples in meals when I get hungry. I don't know the calories in the recipie and it forces me to only take what I'm hungry for. Then I make vegies for side dishes or snack on fruit. It makes me really anxious and I slip up a lot but I'm trying to take each day as a learning  experience and I'm starting to get more comfortable with it, slowly but I'm getting there.Maybe it could help you to give it a try or maybe give you an idea of your own? best of luck and stick with it:)

I count "foods" and "fats," and make sure that I have a healthy balance of carbs, fat, and protein at eat meal. A "food" is approximately 100 calories, but it's not exact, so you can ease off counting. A cup of soy milk for me is 80 calories, and it counts, but a slice of 120 calorie bread also counts. It's not quite as precise, but as long as you make sure you're not cheating yourself with ONLY low "foods" you'll be fine. A "fat" is about 8 grams. An egg counts, although it's less fat, but I use some oil in the pan when I make eggs, so that rounds it off to about 8. Bonus: I don't have to measure out oil anymore, so feel more like a normal person! I hated counting and measuring each cup of cereal and Tbsp of dressing at the table when everyone else just poured it, so becoming familar with what the serving size was and then just coming close helped me to feel more normal and get over my calorie-counting obsession. Now I just have a number that I aim for at meals and snacks, and some days I don't quite make it and some days I go over, but at the end of the day it has to add up to a certain number.

I want to learn not to count, too. I do eat foods with no nutrition facts as often as I can and have been doing much better since I've stopped logging food. But the thing is, I've known nutrition facts of most foods or at least enough to really closely estimate since I was 11 and developed bulimia.

Some days I can turn it off but I hate it, and I hate that I just know it. If there is a good trick out there, I need to know it....

i know how you feel, it's crazy! i count calories in EVERYTHING. i get stressed sometimes when i can't weigh out my cereal properly or when calories aren't listed on something. i don't think i have an ED though, i mean i havent been diagnosed or anything. because i do eat, i just feel immensely guilty for doing so. if i fancy chocolate, i go into the shop and spend AGES in there as i'm counting calories on everything. i love mars bars, but at 260 calories compared to 110 calories in a cadbury's fudge or 95 in a freddo? i usually get the fudge but then i blow the calories later by binging and eating a chocolate cake bar and a packet of crisps etc, it's crazy.

about stopping your calorie counting, well maybe just buy foods with no nutrition facts? or try to ignore it, though it's rich coming from me as i know i couldn't. good luck!

Hmm you sound as though you have some traits of an ed to be honest. Getting stressed if you cant weigh your food? Counting calories and feeling guilty? Those are big symptoms of an ed, you dont have to be seriously underweight or be diagnosed properly to have an ed.