when do you stop feeling fat

OK a bit of a self-pity rant.  I've been at weight loss for a year and a half and have lost about 50 lbs. with 20 or so to go.  I know that I've made a tremendous change for the better, as I feel better than I can ever remember.  I'm just having one of those days when I look in the mirror and all I see is my overweight self. 

I've opted to lose slowly in order to help me change my behaviors permanently, but I guess I'm growing a little tired of the actively trying to lose weight. 

I know that I've lost considerable weight but I still see so much fat on my abdomen, arms and thighs.  For those who have lost a sizable amount of weight... at what point did you feel you really acknowledge that you were no longer fat. 

ok, i've got about 40 lbs to lose now but in the past i got down to 125 and maintained for 7 years.... so here's what i remember.  there will be days you feel fat, that's just the way we are, i think :)  but other days you will see yourself in the mirror and notice how slim your neck and face are, or you will hand someone something, happend to look at your hand and notice how much smaller your wrist and fingers are... and then there's shopping.  i'm not a fan of shopping, but walking into the store and having so many things look so much better on you than they used to, that's priceless.  maybe you  should go window-shopping and try some stuff on, and admire all the progress you've made. 

kudo's to you for losing FIFTY LBS!!  whoo hoo!  that is awesome, you have accomplished a great deal.  don't be discouraged, the rest will come off, and meanwhile i am willing to bet you feel loads better, are healthier, and are alot happier with the person in the mirror.

I think you only stop feeling fat when you're happy with yourself.  When life's good and you're walking around with a spring in your step and tune on your lips you don't worry about the lumpy bits that haven't gone yet....

Small observation......  You make 'actively trying to lose weight' sound like a bit of a grind.  Maybe it's too rigid?  Not enough fun?  Boring? Repetitive?  See if you can shake things up (new recipes, new activities) to make it less tedious and you could find you feel differently or more motivated.    This is for life...  so don't forget to take some time out to smell the roses, kick back and appreciate the new 50lb lighter you.  Give yourself a pat on the back for your efforts so far which are sensational.  Reward yourself maybe with some pampering at the beauty parlour or some lovely new clothes that make you look your very best.

I personally think that, when you've been fat for so long, it takes a while to stop seeing yourself that way. A good friend of mine had lost a ton of weight, and every once in a while she'll rub her stomach and say "GOD, I'm so FAT!" At which point I want to throw spaghetti at her 130 pound self.

If you aren't happy with your body, maybe you have an opportunity to improve your fitness and muscle tone, to look and feel better at the current weight.  If you've already been exercising for a while, then kick up the intensity; lift heavier weights, do occasional intervals.  No need to increase time at the gym - taking a few days off is even better for you than working out every day, and shorter, more intense workouts are good for you.  Set some fitness goals and achieve them. That will help you feel better, look better, and feel better about your body regardless of where you are on the path to goal weight.

I've been thinking about this topic lately...  Several years ago I lost about 60 pounds and gained it all back basically because I never felt that I changed much, I always felt fat.  I am now back to the low weight I was at then (170s down from ~240) and I am still feeling fat.  I have a horrible stomach and I keep having thoughts like 'will I ever really be able to be "thin"?'  When people look at me on the street or in the store, I automatically think 'they are look me because I'm so fat'   It's almost funny I keep thinking like this because I get so many compliments as the same time - on Monday my mom told me it looked like I was wearing a size 6 (I wish!  I'm in 12s still), yesterday a co-worker asked me when I will stop losing weight because I look great now.   Obviously, reality is telling me I should be feeling good about myself and my accomplishments, but that little voice in my head is telling me I am still the person I was.  Like novileigh said, I think it take time for it to sink in that you are no longer that fat person.  Don't let it deter you! 

I was 185 and now I fluctuate between 125 and 130. I also have the days when I feel gross and fat, particularly the past couple days. I agree with the others, there are good days and there are bad days. I try and keep an old picture of myself to remind me of how far I have come. The past couple of days have not been good for me but, I try to think positive or workout a little extra. Maybe some day some one will be able to erase all negative thoughts from our brains until then we just keep pushing forward.

this might seem like a stupid question, but r u on your period?  if you are, you get kinda bloated so you might feel fat, but you're not.  just part of being a woman...  and btw: congrats on losing 50 lbs!  focus on that, cuz that's great!!!

I've lost 135 lbs so far with 15 left to go and I still feel like I'm morbidly obese. I think the problem is that I was fat my ENTIRE LIFE and even though my logical side tells me that I'm not fat anymore there is the side of me that has been conditioned to act like a fat person because that's how it has always been. I keep hoping that maybe after I get the tummy tuck to rid myself of the excess skin rolls I will finally feel thin but I think the fact of the matter is that it's going to take a lot of time for my brain to catch up with my body. I can exercise like a demon and sculpt my body but there is nothing that I can do about my mind. Well, I don't know, maybe therapy but I doubt I'm going to resort to that. I'm just going to try to be kind to myself and give my crazy brain some time.

When do you stop feeling fat?

Never.

About a year ago, I went from 180lbs to 120lbs (I gained it all back -- and then some). Even though I lost 60lbs, I still felt fat. That feeling never disappears. I would see people laughing and assume that it's at my expense. I constantly wondered if others looked at me and thought, "God, look at that disgusting fat chick" or "Ew, she has no right showing her face and flab in public".

I've come to the conclusion that it matters not how much weight you lose -- you will always feel fat unless you gain self confidence.

Good luck. =)

I think everyone has fat days regardless of their body size .... getting over them is allowing yourself to just be happy with you.  Something I struggle with too ..... like yesterday looking at pictures from a birthday party on the weekend - as I'm standing beside my size 2 friends ... hard not to feel fat .... but we are who we are and we are at where we are at .... you have accomplished alot already and you know that you are on a journey - enjoy your accomplishments and look forward to who you will be tomorrow and the next day and a few years down the road.  It's a healthier you that you get to celebrate!!!

I'm so glad you posted this topic because I was wondering that myself! I've lost 55 pounds since 2005. Veerrrry slow weight loss until this year and I can see the differences but now that I've lost this much I see how much more I have to lose! I mean will these stupid thighs EVER get smaller?  So I completely understand where your coming from. I agree with the others who have said that it's normal to feel this way and some days will be better than others. Our self image has been distorted by the super thin models we see everyday in the media and television. We think we aren't where we're supposed to be unless we look like them...I'm here to tell ya that's simply a lie. And I'm not going to fall into that pit anymore...I hope you don't either.  Society has dictated we all be a perfect 120 pounds no matter how tall, short or muscular we are. I'm 5'5" tall and I'd look like I was sick if I weighed 120...trust me, been there done that. We need to be happy with ourselves...whether that's at 130, 160 or 200. I'm probably always going to have "thunder thighs" because of my genetics (thanks grandma!), so I need to focus on the positives and de-accentuate the negatives.

Congratulations on losing 50 pounds! Go get a nice massage...you deserve it!

Thank you all for your thoughtful and insightful replies;  I could relate to something in every post.  

I'm in the same boat as you. I've lost over 50 pounds but I still feel fat, and still think I'm fat. This is kind of weird, because I'm a guy, and most guys tend to not really care if they are over weight (I know I didn't before). I also have about 20 more pounds to lose before I'm where I want to be. Initially, my target was 220, well I reached that, and now I don't think it's enough! So now I want to get to 200. What scares me is, what if I get to 200, and THAT'S not enough? What if the cycle continues where I just want to lose and lose?

I'm doing the exact same thing as Joe.  I am 5'2'' and started at 157.  When I reached my goal of 120, I didn't see it in the mirror. So I made a new goal of 115. Well I hit that, and of course that's not enough either.  So now I'm about 112 and am looking to get to 110.    

However, a little over a week ago I found a photo album of a trip I took 2 years ago and started looking at it.  It was a real eye opener to compare pictures of me at 157 to one taken recently at 113lbs.  I think I'm finally beginning to see myself. 

Original Post by infiniteheart:

When do you stop feeling fat?

Never.

About a year ago, I went from 180lbs to 120lbs (I gained it all back -- and then some). Even though I lost 60lbs, I still felt fat. That feeling never disappears. I would see people laughing and assume that it's at my expense. I constantly wondered if others looked at me and thought, "God, look at that disgusting fat chick" or "Ew, she has no right showing her face and flab in public".

I've come to the conclusion that it matters not how much weight you lose -- you will always feel fat unless you gain self confidence.

Good luck. =)

A similar thing happened to me when a few years back, except I went from 190 to 120 in a short amount of time (unhealthily >.<) and then gained it all back again and more.

You're right, infiniteheart.  Unless you gain self-confidence, you'll always feel fat.  Also, I think there's always going to be "fat" days; we all have them, no matter what weight we are.  We all get bloated and we all feel insecure at times; but as your confidence gets better, those good days will outnumber the bad.