Not sure where to put this but I need advice.

Okay so here is a little bit of background about my venture here on calorie count.

    When I started calorie count I was 175, 5'8" and considered slightly overweight with a BMI of 26.6.  I was determined to not be classified as overweight anymore, the word disgusts me.  I also wanted to feel prettier around my boyfriend ad was paranoid that he kept thinking I was fat.  So my adventure began in November 2007.  Since then I have lost 21 pounds as of yesterday.  My original goal weight was 155 but then I changed further down the line to 145. 

    I am 154 now and still feel as if I have to lose more, I am not satisfied yet.  I tell my mom and boyfriend about my accomplishments of losing another pound or two and they say they are proud of me then all of a sudden I 154 and they think I should stop losing weight.  The thing is though, I want to reach my goal.  My boyfriend told me that I would look too skinny at 145. Wouldn't that be up to me to decide?  Should I try to explain to my mom and boyfriend why I want to keep going to my goal weight or should I stop like they told me?  I don't want to make them upset with me but at the same time I want to feel good about myself.

bummmmppp

145 isn't too skinny, I think that is a lovely goal, it will put you perfectly in the middle of a healthy BMI.  Now if you wanted to go down to 125 that would be over doing it but you're not stupid and if 145 makes you feel good than do it!

I think you should do what you feel is right for you.  If you're not going to be happy at your current weight and if dropping a few pounds will make you feel better about yourself then I think that's worth it. 

It's hard for someone watching you lose weight to understand the numbers. They know what you looked like at 175, see the HUGE progress you've made and probably don't want you to exaggerate. Although your goal of 145 still keeps you in a healthy BMI range -- at the low end but healthy. And yes. It is for you to decide.

Just to cheer you up, and show you how little outside observers know, my mother in law looked at me when I was about 2 months pregnant with my first child and commented on how big my butt was getting. (FYI - the two month mark is the worst for pregnancy because you aren't obviously pregnant and everyone looks at you to see whether you're getting fat or pregnant. Plus, you feel as though you have completely lost control of your body). Anyway, she must have seen how distressed I was by her comment because she quickly said "But that's a good thing. Before you were way too thin and looked like crap".

My point is that you need to be the judge. So long as you are healthy and you know when to stop get yourself to a point that is right for your body, mind and is maintainable.

Good luck.

Thanks so much guys.  It makes me feel a lot better about the whole situation that I actually have people who understand where I am coming from.

I love CC and its members lol

I totally agree w/ everyone else. And i have to say you are gorgeous and you and your boyfriend make such a cute couple!! :D

awww thanks so much!

Cassie718, don't stop keep going if that is what you want to do. The fact that you are able to do it, and are very successful at loosing, keep it up!!! That is awesome to me, I too lost a lot of weight since joining in October 2007. I intend to keep going I don't care what people say. I just look at myself in the mirror and I am totally proud of loosing weight. . .congrats and keep up the great work. Boyfriend just doesn't want anyone  looking at your fine body. . .probably!!! ROTFLMBO 

Yes, it is for you to decide, but your boyfriend has his opinion as well.  However, NEITHER of you know how you're going to like your looks (or how you feel) at 145 pounds because you aren't there yet.  You may get there and decide you love the way you look, and he may look at you and still think you're too skinny. 

Also, you have already met the original goal you set for yourself, of 155.  Your friends and family may fear you're going to turn into one of "those dieters" who is ALWAYS chasing "just another 10 pounds, just this last 5 pounds" and they never quit until they've made themselves unhealthy and... yes, sometimes too skinny!

If you get to 145 and you are happy and feel good, they great for you, your boyfriend should appreciate that (and I'm sure he will) - but IF you get to 145 and then change your goal again, lowering it to 140 or 135 ... then you may have a problem.

One option is to concentrate less on the number on the scale, and more on how you feel - weight lifting might help make you look trimmer without necessarily making you lighter - in other words, it might make your body look more like your ideal, regardless of the number of pounds.

I've thought about what I'll do if I reach my goal and am still not happy with how I look - and the answer I've come up with is to maintain for a few months (still doing exercise, esp. strength training) and see how I feel then - if I want to lose a few vanity pounds I can. But since I can't choose where the pounds come from (no such thing as spot burning), I think it'll be easier to focus on improving my muscles than worrying about where the fat still is.

Stellajo articulated my thoughts on the matter.  But one more thought:  What is your body fat %?  If it's still a little high, then you can certainly lose more weight, but maybe you should focus on decreasing fat and avoid losing any muscle mass.   At this point, improving your muscle mass to body fat ratio could translate into a  smaller, trimmer you, but not necessarily a smaller scale number. 

That's my plan.  I'm going to go down to 125, (47 down, 33 to go) and try to maintain as much of my muscle mass as I can on the way down.  Once I get to 125, then I will focus on toning and getting my body fat to the right %.  And if that means the scale goes down even further, then goes back up to 130, or even 135, I'm fine with that.  Because I will be smaller with 135 of more muscle, than at 125 with more fat.

Well jeez man…I’ll tell you what…at 5’8 154LBS you must look great. I agree with your boyfriend and mother, and I’ll tell you why.  I don’t really care about weight loss, because that’s not what makes you look good.  Worry about toning the body you have now.  If you set your sights on toning you body, then the weight will come off.  So just look at YOURSELF, and not the NUMBERS.  I think you have done an exceptional job so far, and I urge you to keep working out.  Remember this…being 154@5’8 is not a bad thing, it just depends on how you make the 154 pounds look.  Get it?....

 

Bless

 

Potter

i honestly think you should reconsider your new goal, because the word you used that jumped out at me most is "paranoid."  people around you usually are the best at determining if your behaviors are normal, and maybe 145 might just be the start of slippery slope.  suddenly, 135 might sound better, then, 125.  obviously, it is up for you to decide, but what makes reaching your original goal of 155 not good enough?  why don't you feel satisfied with yourself?  is it really about the weight?  now thats something you should really think about before you continue on towards this new goal, because it could easily turn into an eating disorder.  good luck!  best wishes!

I looked at the prom pictures.  You look great.  Another 10 lb weight loss might make you look too skinny.  But it's your call.

So comprimise.  Stop at 150 instead.   

Besides... it's not about the number on the scale!  It's about how you look and feel!!!

Why not train yourself at 154lbs to maintain. This may avoid a plateau later...

Once the family become used to where you are physically, slowly shed the 9lbs across a year. The family will not notice, you will have completed it extremely healthily and taught yourself maintanence...., and you know in your mind you made your goal.