I wasn't too sure where to post this, but I had a cathartic moment after the shower this morning listing things i hate about being fat. So I was thinking this would be good for other people. I happened to be home alone so I got pretty vocal with it. Don't want a critique but I want others to try it too, get it out there!
I hate getting out of the shower and having to lift up the rolls to dry under them.
I hate having side boobs.
I hate having an apron of fat in the front.
I hate not being able to find clothes that fit and then worrying that those I do are making me look fatter.
I hate not being able to get in designer shoes or wear heels because i'm too heavy.
I hate having to "enjoy" shopping with friends when I know I can't buy anything because none of the stores carry anything in my size.
I hate people pitying and treating me like I eat nothing but junk food.
I hate people telling me the way "they" lost 5lb and how that should work for me when they don't realise that 5lb to me is just daily water weight!
I hate being "the big girl" of the group and being a wall flower so no one notices the fatness as much as if i was loud and in the forefront.
I hate the fact that people look at me differently.
I hate being treated differently, especially by guys.
I hate not being able to be comfortable on an airplane because my butt is squeezed into a seat that used to be roomy.
I hate how my pants are snug around my thunder thighs.
I hate chub rub and the scarring it causes because it looks like I'm dirty "down there" (thighs rubbing and that dark area you get from it)
I hate having to lift flab out of the way to see a part of my body such as my armpit to shave.
I hate not being flexible enough to do the things I want because the fat gets in the way.
I hate being too fat for some of the exercises on my dvd's because my belly is still on the floor at the height I'm pushing to.
I hate the embarrassment of realising too late that you can't fit - like on a ride or a chair that suddenly snaps - and having avoiding certain things just in case that happens.
I hate myself for not taking responsibility and fixing this sooner.
I hate not being able to wear rings on my fingers because they're too fat for the heirlooms and too fat for the sizes that aren't custom made.
I hate how my arms don't hang down they hang out to go around the fat.
I hate having to avoid at all or pose a certain way in pictures so the fat is hidden or not as obvious.
I hate being embarrassed for looking like me.
I hate all the little ways I've changed my life and lost the quality of it because of the fat.
There were a few others but that's a good start.
So.. This is the first time I've ever replied to anything. I'm 19 and really embarrassed with my body weight, not to mention other people my age aren't exactly nice about it. It really sucks because I can never find any kind of clothes that fit me! And I often cry when I have to go shopping because it seems like I go up a size every time.. These are the things I hate about being fat:
I hate that people automatically assume that because I'm fat it's 100% my fault.
I hate that people assume I want to be a stick.
I hate that I can't find clothes in my size.
I hate the feeling I get when I look in the mirror.
I hate it that I can't let my fiance touch my stomach.
I hate that its difficult to find something I look good in!
I hate that no matter where I go, I feel like people are staring at me.
I hate going out to lunch, because I feel like the person serving me is automatically assuming that I'm going to get the most unhealthy thing on the menu.
I hate knowing that I have to lose weight, but then feeling hungry.
.. those are most of the things I hate about being fat.. Not all of them. It's almost embarrassing to talk about them, but I know that I won't be judged here..
Melissa, You're right, no judging here. We all understand COMPLETELY and I for one would like to pat you on the back for posting. Takes courage to jump in.
Are you wondering where to begin to get on a get-healthy track? This is a great group of people, all who are (or were) where you are now and most of us are eager to share the experience and knowledge we can, since the more we share the stronger our own commitment to being healthy becomes. If you are not there yet, we are still very willing to be understanding ears for you to talk to. Love goes out to you.
"I hate it that I can't let my fiance touch my stomach."
I smiled at this one, as I am a massage therapist and won't let another therapist massage my tummy or my thighs. As a massage therapist, I wouldn't dream of judging someone else's physique, but am more than willing to tear my own apart. And as I think about it, I won't let my husband of 21 years touch my tummy either.
And I'll add another hate, just for good measure:
I hate that because my 19 year old daughter weighs over 400 pounds, that people look to my like it's my fault that I 'did nothing' to help her. This is in spite of years of counseling (family and individual), dieticians, specialty physician consults, weight loss programs, gyms, diet camps, etc. Yes, parents have a certain obligation to provide healthy foods and guidance, but once a child learns to feed themselves, a great deal of control is lost. And once she got her license, all bets were off!
But I'm excited because she's decided to join me on a weight loss 'awareness' journey. No diet; just eating less and trying to move more. We are doing a 'fun challenge' in that we are both wearing pedometers and trying to beat each other's steps each week. For the last two weeks she has beaten me, so it's ON!
Melissa, Welcome and congratulations on beginning this journey. No matter what anyone tells you or how they treat you, you deserve to be healthy and fit and to feel confident and proud in your own skin.
Do not feel embarrassed, read some of the other posts and you will find that we talk about stuff you would never dream of mentioning to anyone else! We understand and are committed to helping you reach your goal, if you want the help, that is.
And Bonnie, Yeah! that your daughter is joining you on the journey. I know you are happy about that!
Have a great week!
I'm about 222 lbs right now:
I hate that all the clothes girls my age are wearing are way too small. Not just a little bit too small. WAY too small
I hate that if I told someone my bra size they would have to say the alphabet to figure it out.
I hate that I don't even attempt trying on knee length boots anymore because it's just too embarassing to have them not fit over my huge calves.
Things I LOVE now that I lost 54 lbs:
I love that the clothes at Lane Bryant, the only store I ever used to fit into, are now too big for me. (except bras)
I love that my feet aren't as big.
I love that I don't have to buy the largest size in bra at Lane Bryants!!!!!!!
I love that I actually have a waist now.
I still love how being +200 lbs makes the weight come off a bit easier than if I was, say, 120 (<---which I will never be)
I love that my goal weight is something I can actually see myself achieving instead of this obscure number that seems impossible to get to.
I will love being able to tell everyone when I'm at my goal "Hey, I lost over 100 lbs!!" Very few people can say that
whoops double post
I want to frame my frustrations a bit differently. I've been working with my therapist on this for while so while I like this post I'm going to write it in a more positive manner :).
I look forward to going to the Dr. and not having them tell me that I have to lose weight.
I look forward to no longer have a muffin top or an apron.
I look forward to not worrying about what people think of me because of my weight.
I look forward to my body getting stronger so I my body will feel better when I do tasks such as walking up the stairs or trying to run.
Things I hate about being fat:
When people equate being overweight with being stupid, lazy and/or unmotivated.
That I am usually the biggest person at any event I go to.
When people at the gym look at me with that "why bother?" look on their faces. I mean seriously why I am taking up time on the equipment?
Great thread, very liberating to let those thoughts out!!
- I hate, during sex, having to suck in and readjust my stomach when my partner's on top. Otherwise my fat gets pulled as he moves and hurts.
- Hate the sideboobs too, when I raise my arms in my bra and there's that fat hanging over the side.
-Hate having to constantly pull my top down so that it gets unstuck from between my side and back rolls.
-Hate that every time I sit down, I have to grab the top of my jeans and pull them over my stomach. (I can't stand my jeans to be tucked under my stomach bowl".
- Hate having to stick my neck out for pictures so that my 2nd chin is less visible.
- Hate that my gut sticks out farther than my chest now.
I hate not being able to walk or stand for long.
I hate using the electric carts at stores.
I hate fat people clothes.
I hate looking ugly.
I hate having a messy house because I cant stand up for long or lean over at all and forget getting down on the floor.
I hate having trouble getting off the couch or chair.
I hate worrying about if I can haul myself out of the tub.
and I hate showers.
I hate not being able to reach to places I NEED to reach to clean myself in the bathroom.
I hate looking at myself and my husband having to look at me.
I do not make New Years resolutions but this year I want to make these hates go away. I deserve better and I am the only one that can make them go away.
I hear you. Yes, ultimately, you are the only person who can make change happen but you don't have to do it all alone. You are among your own people here.
You do deserve better! And I believe you will have better. We all have a list of things we hate, and yours is very familiar to me. I hope you get to enjoy the satisfaction of crossing those things off the list one by one as you move towards better health. It's a Hell of a rush.
Love goes out to you.
I hate usually being the fattest guy in the room.
I hate wedging my fat into an airline seat which sucks because i do it several times a year.
I hate the fact that i always feel judged even when other people aren't being judging.
I hate the fact that I let my weight stop me from doing things i think i might enjoy.
Wow, it's not every day that something makes me want to post.
I hate that I can't comfortably wear tank tops in public because I was once told that no one wants to see my arm fat
I hate that I starved myself at school because some one said that as big as I was I didn't need to eat lunch
I hate that a kid once threw twinkies on the ground in front of me on the way home expecting me to eat them. In my 23 years I have never ate a twinkie, gross
I hate that after growing up this stuff still bothers me
I hate the sound my pants make when my thighs rub together
I hate when I get called sir
I hate that my mom thinks that this is just a health kick and orders pizza at every opportunity
Hi Frenchy, I remember mean things kids did to me growing up and I'm twice your age. It's ok to remember, just learn to make peace with it and let it go. Mean kids probably had their own set of issues and you just happened to become their focus, it says way more about them than it ever did you, it's just when we are young, we do not have all the tools we need to figure all of that out.
Now make a list of the stuff that you love about yourself, and keep reminding yourself just how great you are.
P.S. Your mom will get on board eventually, but even if she does not, you can do what you need to do for yourself.
I especially identify with these three!
Growing up, my mother frequently told me not to wear tank tops (and an assortment of other clothes) because nobody wants to see any of my body. When I was 18 I once bought a knee-length skirt mostly as a show of defiance! It irritates me to be told that I must be covered from wrists to ankles. Just because I'm fat, I'm not allowed to be comfortable in summer?
I hate pants for so many reasons that I mostly just wear skirts even though pants are more practical. I also hate how when I find a pair of pants that fits my ass and thighs, it gapes open at the waist! I went years without ever buying pants until Lane Bryant came out with those ones for different body shapes and I could finally get some with big enough hips but a narrow enough waist. And I still feel awfully self-conscious in them.
I don't think any of the stuff I put up with growing up will every really quit bothering me.
oh yeah I hate all those things too! My problem is not being able to find a pair a jeans in my size with a zipper, or even any at all! My husband is kinda small, and I hate when people look at him then look at me and think, "Why is he with that cow?" He gets tons of girls asking him out, and I never have any one tell me I am pretty any more! I know I am pretty in the face, but the fat makes you feel ugly. I am disabled too, so now I can't walk too much, and when I do I waddle cuz I was in a car wreck and broke my hip. When you weigh over 350 (and yeah that was after I lost about 75lbs) People just look at you cuz your fat. You know they don't understand the situation, and think it's because I am so big that I can't walk very well. It would probably help with my walking if I did lose some of the weight. I have 13 pins in my hip cuz I broke it in 9 places and my pelvis I broke in 2 places. So I hurt all the time, and no one believes me either. They think I am just fat and lazy, when I try really hard to walk around but it hurts just to walk to the bathroom and back.
I'm new to this. I have to agree with all of you. but most of all I hate being the big girl in the bunch! finding cloth that don;t fit right because I have this fat belly.
I thought of one the other day. I hate my shower door being so narrow that I have to step into it sideways to avoid scrapping my shoulders. Susan