I thought I had it under control

  In November of 2006 I weighed in at 300 pounds.  About a year later, a year of exercising 5 days a week for at least an hour, I weighed 185. I was so proud to have lost so much weight.  After seeing the title, you're probably thinking "That's amazing, what could you NOT have under control?"

  I started college in January of this year. Because of my busy schedule, I was unable to exercise and eat right. And after getting on the scale in May, I noticed that I weighed 230 pounds.  I felt so defeated.  I was so discouraged that I began to purposely overeat and do other self-destructive behaviors. 

  My fiance pointed my behavior out to me, and I decided enough was enough.  I needed to get myself under control.  I signed up for a weight training class that same month.  And now I'm trying to motivate myself to eat better and exercise more. My weight training class(which meets twice a week) is ending next Monday and I'm afraid I'll go into a downward spiral again.

 Has any one here ever experienced this?  What did you do to overcome all of it?  Sorry for the long-ish post.

I think all of us have reached that point at some time.  For me it took a kind of epiphany that I wasn't going to lose this weight quickly.  I realized that it is going to take a life long commitment to eating better for me to lose the weight and keep it off. 

The biggest problem I have seen over these past 3 1/2 years is people in a hurry to take it off fast.  They undereat and overexercise, then can't sustain it.  I'm not saying that that is what you are doing, because I don't really know you, but it's worth thinking about. 

There is nothing wrong with losing only 1 or 2 pounds a month, as long as it stays off.  You're lucky - you are young.  Don't wait until you are in your 60s as I did to finally realize what you have to do.

good luck

  I used to have the problem of undereating and overexercising.  I would consume maybe 900 calories a day and do an overkill of cardio.  It's been hard for me to balance it out for a happy medium, so I guess that's one of the things I need to learn.  With all these fad diets and advertisements saying things like "lose 20 pounds in 20 days!", I get a warped perception as to what healthy weight loss is.  Thank you for your reply

I also started this journey at 300 pounds. It's taken me 18 months and several ups and downs to get down to my CW of 202. I've done a lot of soul searching during this time to focus on habits that are healthy and maintainable. Adding exercise makes me feel good. Will you still have access to a gym when your class is over? I try to hit the gym for cardio and weights 4 times a week. I think the most important change I've made along this trip is to drop the "all or nothing" mentality - if I go out and drink with friends one night it doesn't mean I messed up my diet - it means I had my fun, and I shouldn't drink again for a few weeks. If I only get to the gym once during a week, it means I'm giving my body a rest, not giving up or falling off the wagon. Like you, in the past I've either gone overboard with exercising too much while eating too little or I've said, "Screw it" and eaten whatever whenever for months and months without getting off the couch. This is the first time I've managed to find a happy medium. Good luck to you on your journey. I hope you find your happy medium. =)

  I just researched online and found a community gym about a mile away.  It didn't say on the site, but it should be free.  Now to make myself walk a mile to the gym every day! 

I've also decided to inform my friends and fiance of my plans to lose weight and get healthy.  My mom has been an amazing supporter of me.  I look up to her for her keeping a positive outlook on life while fighting chronic renal failure. 

I'm glad I decided to join this site today and post.  I feel as if things are turning around already.

I am freakishly similar.

I started at 247, signed up for a women's body shaping class. It was awesome, through the month-long class and diet I've lost about 15 lbs (since June 1st), but when the class ended I had a moment of panic. Because I had to go to the class, and I don't have to go to the gym.

Now, several weeks later, I don't workout quite as often, but I still get to the gym 2-3 times a week. I discovered a fitness journal drastically helped me stay motivated. It might sound strange, but I think the trick is to let go a little. If you don't work out for a week, don't let it end your healthy ways, just start right back the next week. If you eat a pint of ice cream and cookies one night, don't let it suck you in. Just accept it and realize that every now and then is no problem, and get right back in.

Sometimes I go days where I just eat maintenence. Just because I'm stressed out (I'm graduating college this month), and can't expend the energy to worry about a calorie deficit. It slows me down a little, so I lose 5-6 lbs a month instead of 8, but its worth my sanity.

Doesn't your college have a gym? I love mine : )

I go to a community college. It does have a gym at a couple of the campuses, so I guess I could check that out. 

I decided today to keep a fitness journal as well.  It makes me feel more in control, I guess.  Usually when I have a "relapse" and eat like 3500 calories, I just call it my off day, but then I notice I keep giving myself those days, so that's frustrating.

The all or nothing mentality is so me - I go all in and if I miss out on a day of excercise, I stop for more than a month and eat whatever I want (or don't want, but that doesn't stop me from eating it!). I've not been very good at looking at the big picture, seeing that it is a lifelong commitment and that days "off" aren't the switch that turns everything else off - unfortunately this has meant that all the weight I lost last year is back again - so I'm starting over, trying to take myself more seriously this time...

Well done for you to stop the bad cycle before you're back to square one - and I think it's great that your family and fiancé support you:-)

I reached the point of 'waking up' today, I guess. I thought I could go on and had 'normal eating' under control. I thought after going through all kinds of EDs  'banning' my scale would be a good idea.

oh how wrong I was. I'm back at the point I was at three years ago and I feel so much like a complete fail right now it's disgusting. the worst part is, though, that my best friend isn't taking me serious, always telling me how 'great' I look. the very same best friend who weights about 100 pound. ugh

I'd do more sports but I am also afraid of falling back into the habit of over-exercising. I did that three years ago. didn't do my body any good. my whole behaviour almost perma damaged my metabolism, even. sigh.

What clairelaine says makes a lot of sense.  You have to do what you KNOW you can sustain.  For me - I know I can not sustain going to a gym.  Maybe I can for a year or 6 months.  But life is messy and I know there will come a day when that gym is just a memory.  I decided it was not fair to me to pin my health or goals on something that may not be there every day.I decided to start walking and do resistance training at home.  I know I can do THIS.  For me, being practiced at and willing to do something so simple is a fail safe for the rest of my life.  I have no excuses.  Everything I need is right with me all of the time.  No matter where I am.  I took away the obstacles and it makes it a lot easier to just stick with it!

hi, i haven't read the other replies yet so apologies if i'm repeating what someone's already said. i've been there and it's a horrible, daunting feeling. the only advice i can give you which has helped make me feel stable is to surround yourself with supportive people. loneliness is the worst feeling ever and family/friends can help you feel loved and dispel the need to binge :-)

good luck!!!

Who wants control, control is what got us here in the first place

Our perceived lack of it!!!!

The first day I started on this web site I read a statement.

My weight loss plan is a marathon not a sprint.

This had a huge impact on me as I always view diets as a quick fix quick result quick failure plan.

I now have a long term goal of twelve months and I daily log into all of the sites logs. Activity, calories, diary, forums. I have been going now for two weeks and lost four pounds ( not weighed myself since Friday) so maybe more. I know this is not long but I am completely hooked and can see results and many positives.

I know I need support and I know I can get it from here, use every tool available and keep going, your doing great.

X Gill

Hi,

6'2'' male, at age 30 I weighed 254 and started tracking my food, every bite, in a journal, and tried to keep mycalories to less than 2500 a day. Lost down to 220-ish when my wife went on Weight Watchers. This change, along with my food journal brought me down to 179.

Then I went on a month long business trip to a fish processing plant, worked 12-14 hours a day, ate at the cafeteria every day, along with eating out and drinking 2-3 beers every night. Came back at over 200 lbs, and ballooned to - you guessed it - 254 again.

I read a book called the 10% solution by Richard Kurzweil, a computer scientist who calculated the ideal diet for disease prevention. Followed that regime for 6 months, then read the China Study and some books by John MacDougall, and 18 months after hitting 254 again, am at - you guessed it - 179 again. Have been at that weight for 3-4 months now.

The biggest thing for me was learning what actually was a healthy way to eat, as opposed to trying to lsoe weight. Losing weight is a GREAT side effect of eating healthy. THIS time around I feel so full (to the point of feeling guilty) that I do not feel like I am depriving myself of anything. I hope that the difference is that I wanted to be healthier and feel better as opposed to just being thinner. It seems these days that it is not politically correct to say that being fat is unhealthy but it really is (all 3 books I mention look at how eating determines what diseases you will get later in life, including cancer & heart disease).

Now with kids I want to be around for a long time. My father in law was recently diagnosed with kidney disease and will need to be on dialyses sooner rather than later. I want to not just see my kids have kids but see them have grandkids and be able to interact with them. I know that that means I have to not just plan on being alive and healthy at 60 but being alive and healthy at 90 and 100 and more, and that is why this time it will be different.

Every fad diet you see on tv talks about a quick fix. Hey, if it took you 6 months to gain 25 pounds then guess what - expect to take 6 months to lose it again. If it took you 30 years to become unhealthy though you can make the change to being healthy in much less time. We are conditioned to think that if we just stop eating bread, or just do 10 minutes of situps a day that out lives will change, but to change your life you have to change your life.

I think the "all or nothing" comments people are saying are right on target -- many of us struggle with that. In line with that, think about your lifestyle -- you're a college student.

I'm a professor and live a rushed life for eight months of the year (only recently decided to take summers off instead of teach). Think about your routine -- the months you're in school and the months you're out of school. I give myself permission to just maintain at the beginning of every new quarter (you might be on semesters). This gives me a chance to settle into a new routine (figure out how to fit work, friends, family -- just everything) into my new schedule. Then without any feelings of failure, I can plan how to fit exercise into my new schedule, which days I want to pack my lunch/dinner, which days it's not possible, etc. Sometimes this takes a few weeks to get successful at and I imagine there could come a quarter where I just decide to maintain the entire quarter.

When I'm more flexible with myself and the periodic changes to my schedule, I find I'm less likely to sabotage. Maybe this will help you too?

Read the post about Committing to Recommit. It was one woman's journey through her weight loss and her attitude to remember that when you fall away from doing well, commit to recommit to your previous way of living healthy. The one thing I do is to write down WHY I am doing the things I am doing...it's for me, my health, the example for my children, to feel better, to live better, etc. I carry that around with me and when I get discouraged, I read it and remind myself why I'm on this journey!

Original Post by madamq:

What clairelaine says makes a lot of sense.  You have to do what you KNOW you can sustain.  For me - I know I can not sustain going to a gym.  Maybe I can for a year or 6 months.  But life is messy and I know there will come a day when that gym is just a memory.  I decided it was not fair to me to pin my health or goals on something that may not be there every day.I decided to start walking and do resistance training at home.  I know I can do THIS.  For me, being practiced at and willing to do something so simple is a fail safe for the rest of my life.  I have no excuses.  Everything I need is right with me all of the time.  No matter where I am.  I took away the obstacles and it makes it a lot easier to just stick with it!

 WELLLLL....I have a very similar story.  Over a period of a year and a half, I lost 83 lbs...down from 240.  Then, over a three month period of time, I gained back 29 lbs.  I got caught up in the "dark chocolate is good for you" warcry and started eating Lindt Lindors every day.  Also, Costco stopped carrying the "Sensible Portions Pita Bites" that I have with my hummus, so I bought Stacey's Pita Chips.  Now, those pita chips taste like toasted pie crust to me...and I went completely overboard! One day, I "caught myself" after eating half a bag of them!  And you KNOW how big those Costco bags are!  But even that didn't stop me.  It wasn't until I stepped on the scale one day and it said 189 that I FREAKED!  THEN I got back on the horse...and I've now lost 19 of those regained pounds.

 THIS time, I've integrated more of the foods I love into my daily regimen.  I eat half a baked potato with sour cream and bacon bits, for example.  NOT low-fat sour cream...because I KNOW I wouldn't keep THAT up.  But that's an entire meal for me.  I have five or six of those "tiny meals" a day and do Pilates on my own machine at home, every day.  And since the Pilates workout also helps my Fibromyalgia and back pain (from degenerated discs), I WILL keep THAT up! Hopefully, until the day I take a "dirt nap"!

 And, thanks to CalorieCount, now I don't get down on myself if I eat something high-calorie or, due to time constraints, skip a day of Pilates. If I have Papa Murphy's Roasted Garlic & Chicken pizza, for instance (that my neighbor brought me), I just look it up and enter it into my "calorie count" for the day. AND I only ate one regular slice! AND it was enough. Interestingly enough, due to the "cheat to lose weight" principle, when I go up to 1700 calories in a day and go back down to 1200-1300 the following day, I actually lose more! Here's a VERY informative forum thread about that:

http://caloriecount.about.com/cheating-diet-i ncrease-fat-loss-ft7139

 The KEYS here are: Get back on the horse; Don't "bash" yourself; Think about how good you looked in those smaller clothes; Adopt a regimen that you know you can maintain; and Don't eat low-cal EVERY day. Go up to maintenance level (or even above) one day a week.

 Here's to your future SUCCESS!!! YOU CAN DO IT!!!

One of the keys too when you go off track is to try and do what you did to get on track.

For me it is writing down everything I eat, if I go off track I just write down what I eat, even for a day. I am a numbers guy so I like seeing how everything adds up, and what I can do do remove calories that are too high (for how full I feel) and add in more foods with calories that I enjoy and make me full.

So when you go off track, try and train your brain to think like how it was thinking when you decided to make a change. If thinking about a new outfit motivates you then when you get off track think about it some more and distrct yourself that way.

"...to change your life you have to change your life..."

I like that! May I quote you?!

That is so-o true...I myself am another living example of making change for the better.

I have eight children, two misses in between. All within 9 years. Our youngest is now 20, but for these past 20 years I let myself think that there was nothing I could do about my weight. I tried to lose, did, gained again and again...too many times to remember. Then about 2 1/2 years ago I lost 42 lbs, the most I have ever lost in my life. (I was @ 254, then down to 212.)

Then, about 1 1/2 years ago I broke my R leg in a fall. On came the weight again, and when I finally joined CC this past June, I weighed 240. At 5'6'' I felt like a balloon......

I think I have learned alot since joining this site...and I really think I can keep it off this time, since I don't plan on breaking my L leg any time soon.

I wish you much luck on your own journey ~ and I look forward to reading your success story. The fact that you have friends & family ~ and a fiance, no less! ~ proves that you have a good support team behind you...people who care about you & want to see you feeling good about yourself.

And like awarnica says, you WILL see a change in your life. One for the better, I'm sure of it!!

Ahh, I had this problem before. I became addicted to the fasting diet, you see. Lost 50lbs in three months, then gained 15lbs back. Now, I'm not exactly unhappy with this, because I did look horrid at 105lbs.

I guess it's a matter of making changes for the long run. Fast-tracking is self-sabotage itself. Sustainability, honey. Sustainability, always.

No apology neccesary for the longish post.

We have all been down that road. I, too, have had that same bad behavior. We tend to punish ourselves once we see that we have strayed away from our goal. Once I realized I had that bad behavior, I started to talk myself out of it. If I wanted something not on my healthy eatting list, say a brownie, I'll compromise. Eat this brownie but do an extra 30 min of exercise. I don't berate myself because it's enforcing the negative behavior and just punishing my sweet tooth. It's okay to have a "dirt day" every now and again otherwise we'll fall really hard for one day and go back down that bad behavior path.

As for your class ending, I suggest joining a gym. They normally have classes that they offer 2-3/week. Take a friend with you to help motivate you or grab your fiance. If you like gyms, either a video workout or a book. There's this really great workout book for women: Advanced Body Sculpting for Women.

Falling off the wagon has happend to me too many times to count. so first off dont feel bad. Just hop right back on it again,. YOU did it the last time and look at your results. When you clAss ends try to find a gym at your school that you can use. IM sure your school has one or find a local gym to attend when you dont have classes. Also if you dont want to join a gym you can do daily walks around campus everyday. Walking can help greatly. if you cant walk outdoors try Lesly Sansone's Walk off the pounds dvd. . 

good luck