It's Time

I had anorexia when I was a teenager, but recovered in college mostly just by deciding I didn't care about that-I didn't want the life of dieting and losing weight.  I tranformed my focus and took on a nutrition plan to build my body and ate how I wanted to for the kind of life I wanted to live.

I graduated and moved back home almost 2 years ago and things have gotten really complicated since.  I've spent a long time trying to figure out if I've relapsed or not, feeling like I need to purge anything to do with an ED from feeling like I make a really bad Anorexic since I never go down that path [intentionally].

Slowly but surely my weight has slipped...lower and lower.
For many reasons I am sure, but the bottom line is I'm falling into the thin cage.
Not just my weight, but the life that comes with a malnourished brain, a starving body.  THe preoccupatino with food [even if how to "fix it" or eat more], the illogical thinking, hampered functioning, even a loss of caring for things that I love in life.  Not to mention the physical symptoms!

And you know what? I don't care how you define how I got here.
I know I'm sick of it.
I've had enough.

No more wondering what it would be like to totally change things as I hang on to the thin cage.

I have to jump.

Into life.

I choose to leave behind the skinny cage and go see what's out there!
Take my life, full force.

I m so pleased sounds like you ve work so hard , thanks for sharing your story its such an inspiration x

It sounds like you know what you need to do and now you need to do it. Do you need any support with anything like increasing calories,stopping exercise,or purging? Can you state some goals?

Original Post by tessa1223:

I m so pleased sounds like you ve work so hard , thanks for sharing your story its such an inspiration x

 think i might of miss read your post , silly me :) im glad you have decided to beat this nasty disorder we are all here like abbi said if you need support h x