Two general questions/observations

I have a few questions or maybe more observations in going through recovery.

Firstly has anyone found that eating more makes them more sleepy not just at night but
during the day? I just feel quite lethargic all the time now I am eating more and that actually
helps me reducing the desire to exercise as I just feel too tired!

Secondly I have noticed changes in my body shape, I am becoming less vieny and less bony
and I can feel the flesh on my body now which is great! I have lost some muscle tone as I've
cut out exercise but that's fine. I just question why, if my body shape seems to be filling out,
why isn't it showing as a gain on the scales?

Hi eringo, just a suggestion, but in response to your second q, is it possible you have a bit of a distorted body image?  I know there were times early in recovery when I was convinced that I could see the pounds piling on in the mirror - I even made my Mum "test" the scales for me because I was so convinced they were wrong!  It turned out it was just my ED messing with my head - in fact I had lost more weight.

It is great that you're positive about the changes you think you can see though.  Also, I hope you're right about weight gain meaning you'll be less veiny - I think my veins are the thing I'm most self conscious about! 

Keep going with the eating and I'm sure the results will start to show on the scales!:)

Hi Lizzie - yes I do have a distorted body image and am very aware of this fact so am trying not to do much analysis of how I look on concentrate on how I am feeling instead.

I am feeling good about the changes though in terms of my body filling out but am just a bit confused as to why the weight isn't going on when I have upped my calorie intake and significantly cut down exercise... might just take a while for my body to get back into gear... ???

I totally understand the sleepiness thing. When I was in inpatient treatment for my ED, I took more naps during the day than I had since I was a kid! I'm not sure if it was because we had to get up at 4:30-5am every morning (although we went to bed early) or I was bored or I was actually tired. Probably all three at some point.

As far as the change in body size/shape- I'm not sure of this but it could be that you have lost muscle mass and gained weight, but since muscle weighs more than fat does, the number hasn't gone up. Like I said, I'm not a doctor or anything so i don't know if that is even possible. That's just the only reason I could think of.

The same thing is happening to me - the tiredness AND the looking bigger yet not gaining weight.

I seriously get so tired these days that I come close to falling asleep while driving [which is NOT good, I know.] and get kinda cranky with people too [also not ideal], yet somehow I still have realllyyy bad insomnia. It's plain horrible! I can relate to you there. I guess it must be because our metabolisms/digestive systems/other bodily mechanisms are working a big harder and for longer periods of time now that it drains more energy from us. It is kinda lucky in a way, a few times ED has tried to make me go for a run but I just had NO ENERGY. Which is a good thing.

And YES with the body-filling-out but no weight gain thing! I thought I was going crazy, it's good to know I'm not alone in that. I suppose it could be body image problems, but I could almost swear that my stomach sticks out much more these days, and that my back looks less dinosaur-like... I guess it can't be though because I haven't actually gained anything. Weird.

Sorry this wasn't really that helpful, just wanted you to know you're definitely not alone! :)

i can totally relate to im always tired , i try to think of it as your body asking for rest to repair. im sure this will get better as you reach a heallthier weight. also i find this mentally tiring trying to  fight all the thoughts and fears

you are bound to feel like that ive noticed little things like actually having flesh on my bum and my cheeks meeting  :). just remember this is normal the place you have come from , although seemed normal it wasnt it was dangerous. hopefully in time you will learn to accept your new body shape thinking of you h x

The fatigue isn't abnormal.  In homes around the world, about an hour or two after the Christmas dinner has finished, you will find people happily snoring, slumped in armchairs in front of the TV.    Eating more than normal and digesting more than normal is very relaxing, especially if the carbohydrate content is high.  Carbohydrates make a substance called 'tryptophan' more easily available to the brain .. and this causes drowsiness.  Proteins are involved in the production of tryptophan which is why a good bedtime snack will contain a carbohydrate with some protein like peanut butter on toast or a biscuit with a milky drink.

If you're not seeing gains on the scales, very simply you need to eat some more.  You may be looking healthier and your skin could be plumping out due to better nutrition but if you're only matching your energy needs then you won't gain.  Whatever you're getting at the moment, add on another 500 cals and see how you go.

Good luck

Sometimes too the ed mindset since eating more can make one think they look like they gained but in reality they have not. I am not taking away from your progress but it needs to be shown on the scale as well. Like Gi stated you need to increase your calories.

hi i just have to ask but i hope i dont overstep any boundries here, but what is ed cause i have had weight problems my who life but i have always thought i was bigger than i really am, please understand i am over weight but no matter how many times ppl have told me i look good whether i was thin or over weight and working on it i have always thought yea right im fat!

so would someone maybe drop me a note and help me out here cause i know im not too thin actually im working on trying to loose weight but i do have this negitive body image thing going on, thanks denise

Thanks all for the comments and thanks to gi-jane and abbi333 for your insights - very helpful. I have been putting in extra effort this week to up the calories more so hoping that this will show on the scales next time I weigh.... do you think if I weigh again in a few days that will be too early to tell? I don't want to weigh too often but if I am not showing any gains still I want to know if I need to up the calories even more....

I am very happy about how my body is changing for the better though - it is great to have filled out and this is definitely a very positive benefit and motivator!!!

Original Post by warnerd5:

i have always thought yea right im fat!

• Do you make yourself Sick because you feel uncomfortably full?
• Do you worry that you have lost Control over how much you eat?
• Have you recently lost more than One stone (14lbs or 6.5kgs) in a 3 month period?
• Do you believe yourself to be Fat when others say you are too thin?
• Would you say that Food dominates your life?

The above is a short questionnaire that some British doctors use as a first step when deciding if someone may have disordered eating behaviour.  If you can answer 'yes' to two or more of those questions it's worth talking to someone.

However, don't panic.  A mildly skewed body-image is actually pretty common and doesn't necessarily mean you have a problem.  Most people see something slightly different in the mirror than is the reality.   Otherwise we would never be surprised when we catch sight of ourselves reflected in a shop window or in a photograph.  Often it's to do with confidence levels and self-esteem.  Since 'fat' is not just a physical description but also a pejorative term we may just be feeling bad about ourselves in a general sense but abbreviate it to 'I'm fat'.  And some people find compliments tough to take... that's not unusual either.

 

Eringo what is your weight and height? How many calories are you eating if not 2500 then I would increase? Also when one increases calories they may gain quick and possibly a lot in a short time but it is water and also from slow metabolism. You need the calories for weight gain and repair.

Warner Have you thought of therapy? I don't know if you have an ed or not. There are varing degrees. It does sound like there is a reason why you have bad body image? When I was inpatient there was a therapist who was plus size. Anyhow she was happy with her body because she said she was happy with herself. She was more then her outside.

Abbi333 - I am 5ft 8.5inches. I am not sure how many calories i am eating - two examples of a typical day of eating looks like the below for me - I have been told this is probably around 2500?

I am going to try to weigh myself again tomorrow and hope for some progress!

Mon 24th

Breakfast: 1/3 cup of raw porridge with milk, honey & 2tsp LSA

Morning Tea: 1 cup of kiwi fruit & strawberries, 1 yoghurt

Lunch: Large dark rye sandwich with margarine, avocado, cheese, beef & salad, 200mL juice

Afternoon Tea: 1 choc chip muesli bar, 1 apple

Dinner: 1 piece of lasagne, Salad

Supper: 1 chocolate Yoplait rice snack

Tues 25th

Breakfast: 1/3 cup of raw porridge with milk, honey & 2tsp LSA

Morning Tea: 1 cup of kiwi fruit & strawberries, 1 yoghurt, 1 tbs pumpkin seeds

Lunch: 1 wholemeal sandwich with tuna and spinach, 200mL orange & mango juice, 1 apple

Afternoon Tea: Sml piece of caramel slice & carrot cake, 1 choc chip muesli bar

Dinner: 2 battered fish fillets, Large handful of oven fries, Salad (tomatoes, spinach)

Supper: Bowl of tinned fruit salad and custard

Erin-i hope abbi gives u a better idea than i did but do u see how hard it is to guess that, what r the cals + how much milk, same w each food, the bread, roll, how much avocado or butter or cheese or beef...what kind, what kind of yogurt, its a complete guessing game for anyone that doesnt have the product+see how much ur eating.

After my awesome meatball stromboli yesterday I could have gone to bed ONNN THEEE SPOT!! I didn't have that luxury with the kids.

Also yes I think a lot of it is mental. Even though you are behind your recovery, think about how when you're in the disease, eating a little makes you feel like you've gained visible weight on the spot! But also, fluids could be going into parts of your body and healing and helping to bring life back to parts that were suffering. That may make you FEEL different without having gained real weight.

agruskin - Yes sorry - I realise it is hard to estimate. I have tried to elaborate a bit more below but I realise it would only be a rough estimate you could give me:

 

Breakfast: 1/3 cup of raw porridge with 3/4 cup skim milk, 1 tbs honey & 2tsp LSA (linseed, soy, almond meal mix)

Morning Tea: 1 cup of kiwi fruit & strawberries, 97% fat free tub of yoghurt (I think this is 150 cals)

Lunch: 2 large pieces of dark rye bread with 1 tsp margarine, 1/2 avocado, 2 slices of tasty cheese, 40g of beef & 1/2 cup salad (tomato, lettuce, beetroot, cucumber), 200mL juice

Afternoon Tea: 1 choc chip muesli bar (I know these are 150 cals), 1 apple

Dinner: 1 piece of lasagne (beef, cheese, pasta, tomato pasta sauce - maybe weighed around 200g??), Salad (spinach & tomato)

Supper: 1 chocolate Yoplait rice snack (I know this is 170cals)

 

Thanks bsh0611 - I appreciated you advice too - I will stick with it and trust it will show on the scales when I get to the right calorie intake!

Erin-id say its about 1800-1900

Thanks agruskin - I will stop asking this 'how many calories' question! :) I appreciate your thoughts though...

Time for a weigh in today/tomorrow to check progress...

ERIN-thing is, u may have gained even eating 1800 cals if ur coming from eating smoething less.  2500 at least is suggested to get ur body healthy, repair internal organs, it takes a lot of cals to heal AND gain weight.

B: have AT least .5 cup raw oats (keep the milk), ADD 1 slice toast+1tbspn PB/cheese/butter, a banana

MT: what u planned PLUS some time of carb (toast, cereal, muffin, bar, cookie...)

L: keep what u have ADD cottage cheese and a treat (whatever YOU want!!)

AT: good!

D: what u have PLUS dressing on salad and im unsure the size of ur dinner but they sound ok

S: what u have PLUS a carb+fruit (PB+J, cookies, chips...)

Thank you agruskin - i really do appreciate this and thanks for the pointers as to how I can improve my meals or add to them.

I was out for breakfast this morning and so had a huge bowl of swiss bircher muesli with greek yoghurt and fruit and a latte so I think I would have upped the calorie intake from my usual breakfast!

I will make the additions to the meal plan but as you say, people differ on the calories they need to gain but I do recognise that I need to up the intake to get back to a healthy body and weight asap - that is definitely my goal - no more messing around - i want this to end!

 

Ugh @ the "people differ on the calories they need to gain comment". Sorry, but that's such ED talk. At the early stages of recovery (after it is evident there is no risk of refeeding syndrome), you should be on a 2500 cal a day meal plan no questions asked. So yeah, if it's such an "asap" goal for you, just do it.