agruskin's Journal

yea, my stomach doctor actually told me i need MORE activity and that that might help me get thigns moving.  so i dunno, im deff NOT running jogging whatever (dont know the diff lol) but ill do something, something not hard on the legs i assume, just not sure what, walking maybe.

hi laura! 

ohh, i love smiling!! lol, glad i made u smile, not sure what did it but good stuff, now im smiling, its contagious!  yea, cals up, scarey, for so many reasons, but im doing it!  everything i wrote about the ice cream experience, thinking and feeling the fears, were in the moment, and ive had those moments like when i "allow" myself to OD on trail mix.  its scarey bc i know conciously whats going on and that i then allow myself to continue.  i often will have the thought of like, it tastes good, im supposed to be gaining, i might as well eat and eat, which is even scarier bc im realizing i love the taste but am almost able to continue eating only bc i still have to gain, which then adds more fear bc in the future what will be, ya know? yikes-crazy run-on sentence! lol

so i ended up going to the gym, did the elliptical but at a lower intensity and then walked a bit but at no incline compared to when ill sometimes use the hill program for 10mins or something.  i didnt run 2 days in a row, i think i did on mon or tues, but not 2 days in a row, hell no!!  my legs didnt hurt on the elliptical, which was good, but just like normal walking in my house or wahtever, i feel my legs hurting, its a bit better but damn, im so sore!  like i used to do this stretch where im standing and ill cross 1 leg over the other knee and sort of pretend like im about to sit, well my upper thighs r so sore that i cant do that!

haha, scallops melting in ur mouth, thats how i feel about lobster, its like butter to me! so good!  i never heard of the restaurant but im sure itll be great+a lot of fun!  yea, its a great idea to bring lots of nonperishable foods w u, ull still have a chance to buy some special stuff that u want to spend on.

so ur bro is there for 1 yr, rt? eek, i hope u get a chance to go over there! has he sent any pics?

yep, bro i think is coming.  last time he was here towards the end he told us that he just eats salad, no bread, and he thought that this was healthy.  its VERY hard for me to hear this, that my 22 yr old brother, a male, eats less than i do, and that my parents dont do anything about it.  my mother will just make extra large meals and prepare food to have around the house hoping hell eat it, i guess, but he doesnt i end up or someone else ends up having it, never him.  he eats like 1 meal a day, drinks coffee all day, and sits and studies.  i tired so hard to get him to do stuff w me but he doesnt, its really crazy.

malls i find so crowded, its just too busy and active for me, everything is so far apart, and the 1 by me is a pain to get to! i like an outlet mall near me that has a gap outlet and a store called century 21 which has name brand stuff but discounted, i also often go to target.  see, im sort of the opp of u, i really dont care about fashion, im not into getting dressed up and looks, i just get whatever fits, i dont care about brands or anything,

 haha, eat out instead of the dining hall-hell no!! lol

wow, u sound SO busy, and so dedicated, clients, experiments, research, the convention, wow, really, WOW laura!!! u r amazing, u must really enjoy what u do whcih is just amazing, keep it up!    

so i bought 4 bottles of wine for the lunch that ill bring over to the restaurant earlier in the day.  i think its called for 1, its a buffet followed by a cake, no clue what the buffet consists of but its a dairy only restaurant.  the wedding is sat night? have u picked a dress yet or know how ull do ur hair? whats the weather where u r? as i said i hate getting dressed up, especially when its cold out and i have to go out at night in a dress, yuck! im not a big drinker, im stopped like a damn fool bc of the empty cals.  in college, well, i was a completely diff person, i did, drank, whatever, everything!  i have a feeling that u drank, but that u were way more straight edged so to speak than i was! lol 

any cooking or baking plans for the wknd? i picked of ground flaxseed to put in cereal or yogurt that ill try out tomm morning.

hope ur day is going better than planned!

meryl-i think i drink more than i need to!  during the day at work i use smaller bottles, ill have 32oz from 8-3pm, then when i get home i use larger ones that r 32oz each, i drink plenty, as i sit here, hoping to go today...

thanks