alicandra's Journal

I'm Back!! And there's more of me to love (again!)
Sep 07 2008 14:44

Hii!!

Wow, I can't believe its been almost 4 months since I was last on here! Crazy, huh?

Ok, so first the good news - I think I've beaten my ED.  I'm not sure how long for, or how well, or if this is all real, but I think I've got it down - I managed to reach 2000 calories the other day! Not as in a binge, just sitting down, relaxing, going out to dinner et cetera. 

I hadn't managed to eat 2000 calories in a day for 2 years before that.  At least, not without sobbing and ending up going into the gym for 4 hours.  And even that only happened once.

The bad news is that with this is that I've put on 8lbs. Ok, so not as much as it could have been, but when I stepped on the scales this morning for the first time in about 2 months and saw 148lbs staring back at me, I did have a panic attack, and consider not eating anything this week.

Which is why I'm back here, amongst all you amazing people =] I want to get back to 140lbs (preferably 130!) the healthy way, without too many tears or too much guilt. 

Oh, and I'm 'all grown up' now!! haha, I turned 17 last week, and it was damn good to eat a slice of cake this year, unlike last year or the year before.  I can't believe I am the same person I was a year ago.

VITAL STATS

Height - 5'8

Weight - 148lbs

Goal weight (short term) - 140

Goal weight (long term) - 130

Life goal - be happy and make people happy =]