anidom's Journal

Strange happenings
Jun 10 2008 10:05

Ok my weight is being really weird and driving me up the wall.

June 8 - 93.8

June 9 - 90.8

June 10 - 92.0

I think I have a serious water retention problem. Ok not that serious but ugh what is my real weight!?!?!?  Ok ok I know your not supposed to weigh more than once a week. Ok. But how I'm doing it is to take the most common weight in the week and mark it down. So why did I put 90.8 on my weight log. Well it makes me feel good to see the line go down.  I'm still trying not to plot more than 2 a week.

Anyways seeing that weight yesterday got me to start some exercise.  I did some sit ups (lost count) and pushups (a measly 16).  Not too many pushups but hopefully with practice that will improve.  I mean to keep this up. I know I keep saying that and then skrewwing up but my abs already feels better this morning. When I suck in, you know what I mean, the shape changes. Got to go little one wants attention now.

5 Kilos a month hmmmm
Jun 02 2008 15:07

I was just calculating how much I have to lose and how many months it is to Christmas.

32 kilos divided by 5 months 2 weeks till Christmas = 5 Kilos a month

That's approx 1.3 kilos a week

And I just figured that's totally possible if I play my cards right!!!!!!!!!!!!

Watch what I eat, keep up the housework and I think I can do this or at least close enough!

Not hungry lately
Jun 02 2008 13:47

Well as I've posted lately I haven't had much of an appetite.  So I'm taking advantage and trying to shrink my over indulgent stomache. Today I had a couple of extras as I had 3 biscuits with my coffee.

Also I've proved that vigorous housework is the key to my weightloss exercise regime.  Since I can't find time to exercise the regular way I might as well get 2 things at once out of it, a clean house and weightloss. Point in case, yesterday I washed one of the bathrooms (bath, sink, toilet, etc.) and all the floors through the house (ie 5 rooms, plus 90 ft hallway). That evening I was 600g lighter and have stayed that way this morning.

Today I planned to wash the other bathroom and dust all the house.  I would have done a couple of windows but it looks like it might rain.

Full length mirror
May 29 2008 10:45

I just got my new bedroom set the other day and it has a huge mirror. It's not exactly full length but I see a whole lot more of me than I have in a very long time. Wow what a shocker!!!!!! I didn't realise how big I actually am and how awful some of my fave clothes look on me. Ugh!!!!!  Talk about a motivator.  I will be looking forward to seeing myself shrink cuz I can't stand the woman I see there now.  Still finding it hard to believe that it's me. Ugh!

I bought some nice fruit and lettuce yesterday evening (after the enlightening) and will hopefully be able to stick with it.  My new exercise regime which is not the usual rep stuff, no no none of that for me... I wish I could, I used to love exercise and weight training . No for me exercise is housework (what fun )  Ok you say "what the......." lol yes I know how boring but it's all my children give me time for.  If I do housework they leave me alone for a while, but if I exercise it's "everybody jump on mommy time". LOL  So there you have it the new mommy exercise regime. And besides my house has never looked better, that is post children. lol

Well wish me luck and good intentions!

Trying to get motivated
May 20 2008 12:52

Ok not sure what to use as my motivation so I looked through some of the successfull people on this site.  In particular I saw a thread by skookum (I think that's right) about her dilema on clothes being too big and I remembered myself this time last year.  I was in the same situation, unfortunately the tables have turned and the problem is the other way around, nothing fits cuz I've gained weight.  This time last year I weighed approx 10 kilos lighter.  It's depressing when you think about it.  Anyways I know that the problem was the diet was too restrictive and I just couldn't cope with it. So what do I do.  Well the plan is to eat what i like in moderation.  No second helpings and always accomponied with a salad or veg.  I was told not to use salad dressing of any sort last yr but I bought a low fat vinegrate and am going to use it to make sure I eat my salad.

Well wish me luck. I will hopefully get back on track.  I don't like what I see in the mirror anymore and come next week I will have a full length mirror to horrify myself in.  I think I really need the mirror so I can see myself more clearly and keep myself on track.

I'm back but not on track
May 14 2008 15:39

Well here I go again....  How many times am I going to say that.  I've said that so many times in the last 5 years it's not funny.   Why the hell can't I keep motivated.  I keep telling myself not to let the stress get to me but do I listen eh.  I just need to find the right motivation.  The problem is I'm doing this completely on my own with no one to talk to. No one to vent to other than this non responsive computer. Also I've been so tired lately to the point where I'm thinking of talking to my dr about it. I get drousey every time I sit down even on the think tank excuse me. Now that sounds like somethings wrong don't you think.  The last time I saw my dr he said my son is wearing my down.  He's very enegetic and a real job to take care of.  I can't leave him unsupervised for more than 10 mins cuz he'll get into everything.  Lately it's been any clothes left unattended and not yet put away in the clothes basket. He'll throw my neatly folded, ready to put away clothes all over the room they happen to be in.  Usually it's our bedroom and then he'll go so far as to dump all the bed clothes off the bed and scatter the pillows.  I don't know what to do with him.  He's adorable but getting to be a terror.  He's not mean or anything like that, he's just naughty when unattended.  Give him something to do and keep himself occupied and he's a doll, just don't let him out of your sight cuz he goes overboard.  Ex paper, colouring books and crayons end up torn papers colouring books on the floor and drawings on the wall.  It's no wonder I can't concentrate on my diet.

One word of hope.  My son starts school this coming October so hopefully life will be a little bit easier. I've been daydreaming about what I'll do with my free time.  Free time that is after I get my house in order.  It so hard to keep up appearances at the mo.  I just can't wait till I can get it in order and clean and see it stay that way for more than an hour.

Well got to go.  I have to see whan my little trouble maker is up to.

Not fantastic day
Apr 11 2008 21:02

Argh!  Why do I do this to myself.  I start out good but end the day a mess.

Anyways, I started the herbal meds for my water retention but they seem to be taking longer than usual to pass.  This time is worse than usual. My legs are ichy and hurt to the touche they are also slightly red.  The funny thing is it hasn't really effected my feet.  It seems to stop at a band around my ankles.  Strange huh!

I don't have much time today.  Will catch up tomorrow.

Happy Birthday to me
Apr 10 2008 16:09

Well as the title says it's my b-day. A year older and the weight still hasn't shifted.  At least this b-day I'm in a better frame of mind than before.  I know I can lose it this time round and I hope I can keep it off.  I will be slim this time next year!!!!!!!!!!

I'm keeping low in cals today to make up for yesterdays slipup.  I just wish I could exercise in peace

Really F****** up
Apr 09 2008 20:28

Went back a bad step. I let nerves get the best of me.  When I get angry, pissed off or fed up I eat out of control .  Hubby called with his bad mood, got me in a bad mood, kids didn't stop fighting over a toy all afternoon and on top I've got pop exploded over my kitchen and i still have to cook for hubby who's coming home at 11.00 pm. AAARRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I just had to get out of the kitchen before I do anymore damage.

I didn't manage to cook for myself so I ate kids leftovers and what was left in the pot approx 150g pasta in all.  I really didn't want to eat it but as I said nerves got the better of me.  Well that's my rant now I have to go cook and clean up the kitchen before hubby comes home and wonders what the hell happened in there.

One thing I promise myself.  I will exercise tonight to make up for my badness.

Good news and bad news
Apr 09 2008 11:25

Ok I have some good and bad news today. Good news first. I lost a kilo YAYYYYYYYYY!  It's only been a couple days so it's probably water. Which for some reason I'm feeling like I have a lot of water retention in my legs. Anyways strayed from the point. I hope to keep this up and not give up or stray from the diet like I've done in the past.

Ok bad news now. I have a 50% chance of having Huntington's disease It's a hireditary genetic disabilitating (sp?) disease. It attacks the nervous system and slow turns you into a jerking, phsyko. Sorry I'm a little, no alot scared, and angry right now. My Grandfather had it and now my mom's has just been diagnosed.  We kind of knew she had it for some time. I just never figured it could be passed on to us, her kids. The main thing I'm scared of is for my kids. God forbid I have it and it passes on to them. The disease attacks a person physical and mentally. From shaking and dropping thing too not being able to talk properly to not comprehending what someone says to you to getting angry over stupid things and having tantrums. Writing this I really want to cry right now. The problem is there is no sure cure. All you can do is keep monitored by a gynetisit (sp?) and take your meds. I don't know what I'll do if I'm positive. I've been putting it far from my mind but today it hit me hard as my mom's dr wants to talk to us all (me, bro and sis) and have us tested to start treatment from now if necessary. All I can do in the meantime is lose the excess weight and keep myself as healthy as possible, meaning eating right and exercising. I'll report back later. I'll just get some groovy music on and try to cheer myself up and stay away from the kitchen.