astevens69's Journal

Trying to plan this day better

Oct 23 2008 08:37

Today is a tkd and kickboxing day. I have to get plenty of good foods in so that I can have the energy to do double classes for Tae Kwon Do, I have to master my one-steps so that I can compete in my first tournament on Saturday. I am also planning on going down to the dojo in Cottage Grove so that I can work on my form and appropriate staging of the one-steps there. (Kinda thinking that 2 hours of practice will nail it.) I would love Ms. Baker's advise because I feel so uncertain... I know I shouldn't though, Ms. Iverson and Ms. Batterman say I will definitely do well... Breathe in, Breath out.... I find Ms. Baker watching me carefully during kickboxing and she told another instructor last class that I doing my first tournament, they both were very complimentary of my skills so I want to live up to that.

So I am eating a complex breakfast and loading up on my B vitamins and will do the same thing for the next two days. I really want to do well at the tournament. Did I just say that again?

Today is first day of the rest of my life.

Oct 22 2008 08:15

Well, I know that everything is really alright. I shouldn't be so concerned about my "weight", I just need to be happy with how my clothes fit. I exercise with great intensity on a regular and scheduled basis. Everything is going to be alright.

I need to drink water today. Haven't done so well, drank coffee.... Still no water...

I need to eat regular meals and not let myself get too hungry. I ate two waffles this morning, plain, one bite of Sean's tuna salad, and that's it so far... two small peanut butter and jam sandwiches and a spicey salmon roll...

I need to drink less alcohol. Haven't touched a drop so far today.... well, about 8 oz wine...

I need to clean my house. Got the top rack of the dishwasher loaded... and the counter cleared... Still need to keep going on that! No interest here, I will start the dishwasher and have clean dishes in the morning.

A bunch of "needs," where are the "musts?" A need indicates that I am searching for something to make me happy. I need to be thinking about avoiding pain and fear, what will get me there? When everyone was concerned about my health, concerned that I wouldn't live to see my children grow old, that provided a concrete "must" for me, which means I am still living off other's emotional needs.

What must Angela do to meet her emotional needs. Something to think about.

Another day.

Oct 15 2008 11:21

Well, I did better on my eating yesterday and today has been in line. I still need to get my water consumption up. I got my workout in last night even though I didn't get to do taekwondo,

AND I talked to my instructor's instructor, Ms. Baker, and she says that we can schedule our belt testing in December to fall on Saturday the 20th, so that maybe my Mom and family can be there to see Duncan and Ian and myself test. Master Goins will be there, it would be a great honor to be judged by him.

Crashed and lost my entry

Oct 14 2008 10:43

almost makes me want to cry... I lost a whole entry, and a long one too.

Fallen off the wagon, want to get back on...

Oct 13 2008 12:07

Well, even though I have changed my body enough that I fit size 6 jean (and I haven't worn JEANs in decades...) and small in shirts and dresses, I just have been coasting.

I have my regular workouts, and my not so regular running goals.

I haven't been taking my vitamins regularly, like I had been when I was steadily losing inches and fat, now I'm just kinda hanging out, without a plan, without a lot of enthusiasm for what I am doing.

I went to go for a short run yesterday, just the standard loop that I used to walk. I had thought that I warmed up enough before I left, but I got such a horrible shin cramp that I had to stop running in order to address. I just walked home from there and tried to stretch it out, my left leg was pretty out of whack, my left foot turning inward a startling amount. Really need to get back to stretching and long warm ups.

And dammit, I still haven't eaten today and it's past 1PM. I can't seem to type either...

My Run for Sustainable Schools 5K

Sep 14 2008 17:37

This morning I got up and went to run in the first Run for Sustainable Schools. There was a 10k and 5k with a fun run for the little kids. The run started in Alton Baker Park, went down to the Autzen Bridge, back west on the South side of the Willamette River and then back across De Fazio Bridge to the finish in Alton Baker Park, a very pretty loop that I didn't spare much attention on so that I could do a personal best, I worked on my breathing most all the time and worried that I started too fast again, but I was able to finish in my best time yet for a 5k. Overall standing was 21st place out of 59, 2nd of 8 in the F35-44, with a time of 27m06s and an average pace of 08m44.6s. I was really excited when I looked up to see the timer which said 26m56s, I wanted to sprint to the finish but I was really putting out a constant effort and didn't feel like I had much left. I ran my fastest /km today also, 4m56s. My next race will be a 7k in October on the 19th. I will post a picture as soon as it comes in.

Back from Vacation...

Sep 11 2008 14:11

It was a whirlwind trip, fast and furious... I am sooooo tired.... I feel pretty calmed though, surprising as I was resenting the shortness of it... But I am so happy to have had it, the time with Sean was worth every short moment and getting to see my friends and family was great too... I was worried about gaining weight while there, but that never happened with all the walking we did, and I always took the stairs between levels... I should have taken pictures of the stair/escalator walkways... everyone was on escalators, standing... But I did take some pictures.....

On our way to a nice dinner....

http://media.calorie-count.com/userpics/full/userpic_923472_e4b48387f4d27b22c2207a1079f3911f.jpg

At the pool.....

http://media.calorie-count.com/userpics/full/userpic_923472_ab89e81655db41a00af845cdcf08d157.jpg

And my favorite!

http://media.calorie-count.com/userpics/full/userpic_923472_a8c43bee44aeb9f5800f9bc4a5f305b8.jpg

Groovy cool time! Glad to be back!

Tryin' not to freak, not about diet...

Aug 26 2008 11:25

I hate that my house is surrounded by construction fencing, and that the crews take breaks right in front of my house in the shade of my cherry trees, swearing, smoking cigarettes and leaving the butts. I hate that today is a big earth move day and I have 4 dump trucks driving 20' within my front window in rotation, speeding down my street, throwing up dirt and dust and being horribly inconsiderate to the fact that they clip/crush my grass at the end of my driveway. RAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

My Vegas Clothes

Aug 24 2008 11:40

Oh, how I want to fit into my Vegas clothes.... The two shirts in question are only too tight in the chest... I really want take off more inches, my chest is stubbornly holding on. I'm supposed to be a B cup, but B cups don't fit because my breasts are not close enough together. I need the underwire to stay the same size with a smaller cup... but I can't wear these shirts with a regular bra anyhow, they are a halter and a spaghetti strap. We'll see how it goes...

I weighed and measured today. Things are looking good. Still the same weight, but 12" total loss. It was a 6" loss previously, so I have taken another 6" off. Mostly in the waist, 3.25" since July 9th, 4.75" total gone off the waist! Actually all of the loss was in the lower body… no changes up top. So, while I haven’t lost any weight since my last weigh and measure (I am a half pound heavier), I have lost another 6”s. I must be losing fat and gaining the same amount of weight in muscle. I did some calculations and:

Date----------7/9/08-------8/24/08---------Gain/Loss

Weight-------136.5 lbs----137 lbs-------- + 0.5 lbs

Body Fat-----31.5%--------28.5%--------- - 3%

Fat------------42.8 lbs------39 lbs---------- - 3.0 lbs

Lean Mass---93.7 lbs------98 lbs--------- + 4.3 lbs

Doesn’t quite add up, but this is what body measurement calculators give me based on my recorded inches... Not too shabby. A change in body composition! A change of 7+ pounds in 6.5 weeks.

Calorie Count Plus should have a way to track these sorts of changes, I have been very frustrated by the scale not moving, I can see that I have indeed made some changes to my body, but the scale isn’t getting the whole picture. Being able to keep track of my body measurements in conjunction with weight and calories burned would be totally motivational!

Goal: 134, a 3 lb loss by September 7th, Vegas Day! Two weeks to go!

Physical: Continue getting 1 ½ hours of martial arts twice a week, and 3 hours of running a week

Fuel: Continue to zigzag my calories between 1275 and 1600.

Goal: 133, a 4 lb loss by September 7th, Vegas Day! Two weeks to go!

Need to run!

19 days left

Aug 18 2008 08:41

Vacation time is almost here! We just got back from camping for 5 days, that ate up a bunch of time...

Only 19 days, I had better make my appointments for body care. Spray on tan, pedicure, manicure, my hair appointment is already set for Sept 1st. I am going to lighten it up a bit and add summer highlights of honey and the darkest natural red. I got a bunch of sun during camping, I can't believe how pasty white most parts of me are... good thing I tan easily, my shoulders were a bit tender but are just about where they should be now...

I test-wore half of my bikini, I didn't want to wear the bottoms because of TOM. I went to Planned Parenthood last Tuesday to change my pill type in order to stop the spotting that is constantly going on, so far so good... we'll see how it goes during my vacation, once again the timing is spot on (no pun intended) for bleeding during vacation, so sometime between now and then I am going to have either force a period or something so I am not bleeding during Vegas. This is one of my biggest concerns about my vacation, my weight is coming off and I fit my bikini, but I don't want to be menstruating.

I took time to relax this last week, up my calories and do just normal stuff while camping. We did a mountain bike ride, about 8 miles and it was challenging, but it strained my knee. So I iced in the lake and got out and buried my leg in the hot sand. It felt so good, I wiggled down into the sand and created a cradle for my body in the heat, it was wonderful. I got to do lots of swimming, walking, and bike riding. No sleeping in or that sort of stuff, the dogs needed to go for walks several times a day, including sun up.

So this week I am getting back on the running schedule and tae kwon do with cardio kick boxing. I probably need to do some skating also, extended cardio and such.

I am stricting up the diet also, sticking to 1500, extra calories for the the extra activity, gotta reset my values with CC. So, I am off to make breakfast, oatmeal and milk. And back to logging religiously, need to make sure I am doing this right.