backtobasics's Journal

I'd hate to say it... but I don't know how I weigh. That's right... I don't. I'm actually kind of terrified to even find out. I'm not thin and i'm not obese - this much I know, but i'm also definitely not 127 pounds anymore. I think i'm more 132 which is horrible and leaves me at my highest weight again... or higher.

I don't know what happened to me or what made me stop eating healthy and excercising. I don't know what made me stop caring. I just know that i'm sick of the way I am.

Also, school started last week and i'm taking a dance class where I have to change infront of 25 other girls. A few days ago we had to try on dance clothes and I ordered a large in both the top and pants (the mediums fit but the large felt more comfortable). I wanted to die of shame.

Homecoming is October 13. Monica asked me if I was going. After all, it's my senior year of high school and i've never been to homecoming. So the question is...am I going? Well if I drop weight by then yes I will.

Another thing - i'm taking a Food Nutrition and Science class that will preach nutrition and also teach us how to cook. I really think this will help me since a) I need to know more about nutrition and b) I need to know how to cook.

Oh and I got my senior pictures back in the mail and oh my god. They zoomed in sooooo close it looks like my face is huge which it isn't (but I still freaked out).

All of this is motivation I suppose!