bobev's Friends

So weighed in today at 170.30 lbs. It has now officially been since October 9th when I first hit 170 and it has been up and down since then. It's getting a bit ridiculous now. I would of had to eat at maintenance every day in order for the scales to not move. I'm far from that I have deficit's of over 500 4 times a week, if I go out that night I make sure I burn in the morning, just so I can eat a little more than 1200 calories.  I exercise 4 days a week for 30-45 minutes.  I have never gone over my burn meter in 14 months. I have decreased my calories as 1400 and 1500 I was gaining daily. I'm full on 1200 calories as long as I plan my day and eat the right foods.

Breakfast: Special K and 1 cup of 2% milk. Cup of tea, no sugar (of course)

Snack: Usually yogurt or some baby carrots (lots).

Lunch: Tortilla with either tuna or chicken breasts ( small slices) land lettuce. No dressing, no mayo. 1 cup of mixed veggies. 1 cup of diced cantelope, blackberries and yogurt poured over ( Yummmm).Snack: Usually a fibre 1 bar, or melba toast with a bit of humus or apple.Supper: Chicken breast, broccoli, salad, someimtes I'll add the potatoes (just a bit though), whole wheat roll. Supper is easy, Salmon, Shrimp, Sole ( can you tell I love my fish), even slip in a pork chop, small 3 oz steak the odd time.Snack:  Love my night time snack, maybe popcorn (air popped and 3 cups), fruit with yogurt or sugar free jam on my ryvita crackers. (85 calories)So I know I am not overeating and exercising to make sure I have 500 deficit. This month I have not lost an inch, not even a cm. Not sure what is keeping me motivated I guess I'm just strong willed.I know you guys are all hanging in there and praying I will finally drop on the scales and I thank you for being so supportive of me,  so trust me, you'll be the first to know when it happens.  Calories Eaten:  1252  -  Calories Burned 1820  =  -568

I'm so upset. I just came home from Wilmington after having so much fun visiting with one of my best friends. We're hosting Thanksgiving at our house tomorrow (20+ family members) and the house is still a mess, not that I really care, but I know something's up because Mom isn't freaking out. I made a joke that she must be on Xanax. Then I realized she's drinking and smoking.

She is a "recovering alcoholic." She hasn't smoked or drank in over 3 months. She's lost 35 pounds. She's almost been like the mom she used to be. "I'm having a relapse," she tells me. Why? She said, "I don't know." I asked if she would please stop relapsing after she finished that cigarette. She said after the pack.

I'm shaking and I'm trying not to let her see me cry. She came in to talk to me and she promised once she wakes up tomorrow she will go back to sober. I believe that she means it but I don't believe that it will happen.

It's the holidays. She's stressed. She's lonely. Our dad's in Iraq. Our older brother is gone. We all hurt. But we have to face our pain instead of running from away from it. Why can't she see how much it kills me? My poor dad? It tears our fragile family apart at the seams. And she wonders why my little brothers don't respect her. How can they respect the example she is setting? (I don't just mean getting wasted every night.. tons of other things stem from it)

I just want my mommy back. :(

Feeling sore today when I got up. Yesterday started doing some High Intensity Interval Training. Felt great, did 30 seconds at 7.5, 90 minutes 3.5 and repeated this until 30 minutes was up. Time went by fast, but ohhh those muscles are hurtin today. My treadmill said I burned 240 calories in 30 minutes, so not bad. Feel stiff and sore in the arms, I guess I was pretty intense with my workout. Didn't go to Zumba class tonight, should have, but felt sore and no other reason really, just didn't feel like going. I'm bad, I know.

Tomorrow I have plans of getting up and doing a good workout on the treadmill and universal. Hopefully I can burn about 400 calories. Going to a buffet for supper and then a Christmas show after that. I have to burn that many in order to enjoy supper. A buffet is my weakness, but I do try and stick to the salads, shrimp and salmon. It's the 45 different kinds of dessert that I loose all self control with.   Hmmmm. Going with 13 other members of my family so it should be a fun night. Just what I need a buffet and a few drinks. Hmmmm, on second thought I think I need to burn more like 4000 calories.

Calories Eaten:  1102 - Calories Burned 1630 =  -528

Fat - 19.1% (24 grams)
Protein - 25.7% (73 grams)
Carbohydrates - 55.1% (157 grams)
Alcohol - 0%
Other - 0%

Daily Sodium Intake - 1,555 mg
Daily Sugar Intake - 29 grams
Daily Cholesterol Intake - 88 mg
Daily Saturated Fat Intake - 3 grams
Daily Fiber Intake - 12 grams

Felt alot better today with cutting back on my carbs and getting back to watching what I eat. Carbs are still a little high, but working on it. Low in calories, but little upset stomach.

Calories Intake: 1103- Calories Burned 1870 = -767

I have strep throat:(  I went to the emergency room this morning because when i woke up my uvula (that little thingy that hangs down in the back of your throat) was swollen to about twice the normal size, maybe even more. It keeps blocking my throat and I am afraid I am going to choke on it. Thank goodness that my glands aren't swollen because I don't know if I wouldn't choke to death. The nurses were first to look at me and look startled. I am never very comfortable with that. I told them it was swollen. The second nurse looked twice and said she's never really seen anything like that before. The doctor looked and said, "oh my, thats bad."  Not fun to hear. I got a shot in the butt for strep. Say a prayer for me that the kids don't get it. I just came down with a sore throat YESTERDAY and by this morning....crazy swollen painful strep. Big Bummer. November really really sucks. The only good thing about it is my son's Birthday, which is today. He's 6 years old and he and his brother and sisters will be spending the day at Nana's, without me because I am sick and contagious. Even my husband had to stay home this morning while I was at the hospital and now he is taking the Birthday cupcakes to N's school. I can't even do that!

The scale said 145.6 just a few minutes ago. WHAT?? This is nuts considering how much crap I've eaten recently. I'm not going to log it - I had a couple beers last night and it's probably all the extra fluids I've peed out. :)

Don't you hate when you put on a pair of tight jeans fresh out of the dryer? I had a REALLY hard time getting mine over my thighs last night! The first thing I thought was that the weightlifting has made my thighs bigger - but I didn't beat myself up over it for once. So I just measured my thighs and they're a 1/2 inch smaller than they were in September. What gives? Maybe I'm just getting more of a bubble butt, haha! Whatever. Can't complain about a nice tush. :)

I really want to make pancakes for breakfast (thanks Runningbuns :P) but we just got new countertops put in our kitchen and the stove isn't in yet! What a bummer! Maybe I can find some eggos.

No Panthers game today (we lost Thursday to Miami :() What does one do on a Sunday without football? Oh yeah, I don't recommend the movie 2012. I was hesitant about it because I'm not a fan of any John Cusack movies, but the previews looked so badass..! Sadly, it wasn't. The graphics were inconsistent. Sometimes they were awesome, other times they were horribly cheesy. The plot was weak, and there were a lot of accents that were really hard to understand. Oh well, we got in free so I don't even care. That was the first time I've been to the movies since Transformers in June. Whew!

Hope everyone's having a great weekend. I am. :)

WOOOHOOOO :D I ran my first 5k race this morning! I walked one last year but that doesn't count. I met up with my friend Caleb before the race, so I wasn't all alone, but he's a really good runner so he took off and I ran by myself. I didn't use my iPod so I didn't worry about the time at all. I just wanted to run the entire thing. I thought I would be slow because I'm used to running indoors/on a treadmill. It was in the low 40s, but there weren't any significant hills, and I finished in about 35 mins. That's about 2 mins faster than on the treadmill! Wee :) (Mr. I-hate-to-run Caleb finished in 22 mins and got an award for fastest male in our age group.)

I have really sucked at being on CC now that I don't have a whole lot of structure in my life. AHH! I feel like a bad friend because I haven't been keeping up with journals. :( I'm getting caught up now. On the other hand, I have worked out every day since Sunday! Running, TRX, Body Pump, volleyball, and yoga.

Life at the folks' house isn't so bad so far. My little brothers are huge brats to my mom. They don't listen at all. It makes me furious that they are so disrespectful, so I usually interject and join the yelling and it gets pretty ugly. Luckily it hasn't happened too often yet. I have to remember I have to set an example for them. She and I have been cleaning the house all afternoon by ourselves.. no thanks to them.

I haven't been sleeping very well since I moved back in. I don't get my own bedroom until after we use it for Thanksgiving dinner, haha. I miss my damn bed!! I'm tired all the time because I'm rolling around all night.

I think I'm going to see the movie 2012 tonight. Has anybody seen it? My inner 13-year-old wants to see New Moon now that I've finally finished the book, but I think I'll wait till some of the hype dies down.

Last night my friend and I went to see Twilight, and then stayed for the midnight showing of New Moon. New Moon is much better than Twilight! I personally felt that Twilight the movie was just a bunch of the two main characters staring at each other with pained looks on their faces. It really got annoying, and I can't stand the Bella character. New Moon was good. I enjoyed it. It still left out parts of the book, but I suppose you just can't fit it all into a movie. That is why I like books better. Bella was still annoying in this movie. I hate the way she treats Jacob Black! I didn't get home until 3:30 this morning. I am too old for this kind of stuff, but it was still fun. Even though the theater was filled with a bunch of Twilight Moms not me! I only saw about a couple of teenagers. The rest of the crowd was a bunch of middle aged women. Kind of weird.

Those people who did not get Twilight tickets were lined up outside the theater for hours waiting to come in. I am not sure why they would do it. They should have just bought Twilight tickets and then already been in the theater for when they started lining up for New Moon. We all walked out of Twilight and lined up for New Moon and the manager tells us that people are lined up all the way around the theater to get in for New Moon. CRAZY!

I ate awful yesterday, but I'm not going to worry about it.

RUX, if you read this, I understand about guilt feelings. I feel guilty that the kids have been staying at my moms since yesterday afternoon. My mom was helping me out by keeping them for me to get cleaning done. My friend was originally supposed to come over here and the house was a mess. I feel guilt not because I miss my kids (which I do). They LOVE going to their Nana's house and staying over. The reason I feel guilt is becuase it is A LOT for my mom and dad to handle all my kids. I know they don't mind doing it but usually by the end my dad is yelling at everybody and it is very stressfull. So I am about to leave to go get them before they stress my dad out too much!

Just thought I would inform you that I did move the scale, but gained, I am now up to 170.90. Wow, after this week, I thought for sure I would drop at least .50 lb. Very disappointing.

So have been working on some stats just so I can figure out just how consistent I have been with my weight loss.

January I weighed 191.40 today I weight 170.30 that a loss of - 21.10 lbs.  So 21 lbs. over 11 months and that makes an average loss of 2 lbs. a month or .50 lb. a week. So I guess when I work it out that way, hope I'm correct in how I have figured this out, then things don't look so bad. I have learned that my body doesn't loose weight from one week to the next, it drops once a month and makes up for it then. I have seen my weight drop 2.3 lbs. over night and then nothing for the next 3-4 weeks. It's very frustrating, but looking at the big picture, I am loosing. Just not as quickly as I had hoped.

The worst part of this is I have another 20 lbs. to loose, so at this rate, I have another 11 months before I reach my goal. Ohhhhhhhhhhhh, and that's considering I loose at the same rate that I have these past 11 months. Oh, geez, I wanna play a new game, this one's to hard to play and I'm not winning.  

Calories eaten: 1214 - Calories burned  1630 = - 416

No exercising today, hurt to much from yesterday, so had to cut back on calories eaten today.