kizzichan's Journal

I will do it!
Nov 06 2008 15:27

I will break out of the 140s!  I am tired of being ashamed to tell people how much I weigh!  I am exactly 140 pounds as of this morning.  It has taken me a month and a half, but I have finally managed to overcome starvation mode and begin losing like a normal person.  It was so hard to sit back and watch everyone else lose while I waited for my stupid metabolism to catch up!!  I know that 5 lbs in a month in a half is unimpressive but I had a lot of damage to my body to undo.

I am no longer obsessing over each and every calorie, afraid that 1050 will be the death of me.  I am healthy and strong and I will not let the eating disorder mindset overtake me again!

So, I set this goal: by my brother's birthday (April 18th), I will have lost all my weight to hit 125.  Even if it is slow, even if I want to give up, I will keep plugging away.  I am tired of looking back on the past and thinking why didn't I keep going with it?  I could be skinny now!  Well, I will be skinny, and I will weigh 125.

Oh, and I will NOT gain holiday weight.  No effing way.