No support!Jul 04 2009 08:44
I am really depressed about the fact that Josh won't help me in any way. Not only will he NOT help me, he works against me. He is always eating junk food around me, argueing with me when I say I don't want fried chicken for dinner, and then all the while saying he is supporting me. I don't know what to do, I live in a new town where I have no one (especially anyone my age) to lean on, and get healthy with. I have no money to join a gym. It is really lonely having nobody to help you. Everyday I feel like I am on the verge of a binge. And then of course there is the chuch that Josh and I serve in...they mean well, but everytime I get together with any of them, it is all based around food...and really really bad food at that. What do I say to the little old ladies in my church who baked me a batch of cookies, or the sweet couple that wants to take us out to dinner? What do I say when my southern nieghbors (who cook EVERYTHING IN GREASE) invite me over for a meal that makes Thanksgiving look like appetizers? (It doesn't help that her food is delicious too) In this town I would really offend someone if I didn't eat thier food, and accept thier hospitality. AHHHHHHHH! On the upside though, when I go to my mother in laws house she really supports me, and eats right with me when I am there...but how often am I there? (She lives in Rapid City, 5 hours away)
Marly
I really sympathise with you here. Everyone where you live sounds very welcoming and that makes it hard. Your husband is probably a bit scared that you have taken the step to change your life. Some people do seem to feel threatened by change in their loved ones. But then again he wants to eat junk food, so why not let him? It doesn't have to affect you, only if you let it. You could cook your own food and eat healthily without making him feel bad - after all, at the end of the day it is your responsibility. You are on a mission and other people's lifestyles shouldn't have to change for you. With regard to people on the outside, you could always tell a little white lie and say, Oh, I have been to the doctor and I have been told that for my health I have to cut down. Most people would perfectly understand. On the other hand you could go to the docs and ask him to give you some insight into the health risks of being overweight - then you wouldn't be telling a lie as he would probably advise you to lose. You could accept the cakes from the ladies and tell them you are going to take them home and freeze them as you are on a diet for your health and you will have one as a treat now and then. Adding perhaps, with God's help I can resist temptation! Hope I haven't gone on too much! Good luck. I do sympathise, but you really can do it! It's all down to you.
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Thanks Kathy. I do eat seperate meals from Josh, but it is wearing on me that I don't get to make one meal and enjoy it together with him...I am kinda old fashioned that way I guess. But I did get two comments at church today that people noticed I have lost wieght...so that made me feel more ancouraged. |
Yes, it's hard on you. I live alone so sometimes I can forget that its good to share things with the person you love, and food is a basic pleasure for everyone. I know that when my children come over and my grandson I really get a kick out of cooking for them. It makes a change from just cooking for boring old me! Its lovely that people have noticed you look good. From your picture you look lovely in any event. Take care and keep up the good work. Lots of kind wishes from the UK. xx
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I'm amazed that your husband is so resistant to your attempts at self improvement. there's an old addage, happy wives make happy hubands. all i can think of to justify his attitude is maybe he's affraid he won't get to have the foods he likes and so sabotages you to ensure his supply. my sweet wife is very generious to buy me the foods i need even though she has her own preferences. maybe reassure him he can still eat his foods, just allow you yours in his company and in peace. stay strong! |
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