mcderin's Friends

Two of the boogers are having a puking contest right now, I think that Imonster won.  Abooger came home from school after puking on her teacher.  Imonster did some ysympathy puking for her and then felt better.  So I took daughter and two boogers out to get some stuff Mainly gingerale and Imonster puked all over the car.  Came right back home and now I get to detail my car.

Promised Pbooger pizza for an afternoon snack, but I think that it might be for dinner instead.  Chicken soup for the two boogers.

Anyways off to vaccum the car.  TTFN

Holy CRAP do bagels have a lot of calories. I didn't have anything on it, but it was still about 180 calories more than I consume for breakfast. Factor in the candy my Secret Santa gave me (I put the other half in my bowl to give away) and I'm already 350 calories above where I would be otherwise. However, at the end of the work day I will be at 821 calories. I will probably have a snack when I get home because my mom is not likely to get home until later again and we can't go to dinner until she gets home and then there's the waiting....

Yeah we didn't go out to dinner last night. My mom didn't get home until 6.15 and I have to put the boy to bed before 7.30 or he's too hard to get up in the morning, so there was no way we could make it out to dinner last night. She did, however, bring home half of her lunch of pizza fries from Carbone's, so that's what I had for dinner. Not the healthiest dinner ever, but I stopped eating when I was full, and only picked another piece or two after that, so I guess I would consider that a mild success. Also, I had a small slice of cake and since I spilt about 1/3 of the batter on the floor, the pieces were smaller than they were supposed to be in the first place, and after my one small piece, I didn't have any more. My weight went down 0.2 pounds this morning, but I'm not sure how much of that was actual weight because I'm still measuring with TTOM water weight. I suppose that will go down either Friday or Saturday so I will have an accurate measurement again.

Anyway, since we didn't go out to dinner last night, we are going to try again tonight. She really wants to go to Baker's Square so that's where we will be going. I'm going to get half of a fajita pita and fruit and save the other half for lunch tomorrow. So my dinner will be about 400 calories, so at least I won't go too far over my calorie budget today. I didn't wake up this morning to work out so I'm still burning about 2300 a day at my sedentary rate, so I should have a deficit of anywhere between 800-1100. If I behave.

CANDY! My Secret Santa gave me candy. Not a lot because she knows I'm losing, but enough. There were mini Twix bars, which are my downfall, and Dove Peppermint Bark. I ate one peppermint bark and three Twix minis. I gave two Peppermint Barks away and put the rest in my basket of candy for people to munch on. But the thing of it is, while I was eating the Twix... they didn't give me a sense of satisfaction like they used to. They just... dont taste as good to me anymore. How weird is that? At one point I was buying a Twix bar a day and was eating them without a care in the world, and now they are just too sweet, too candy-ish. I'm a little happy about this, but on the other hand, I'm sad too. It's like, changing who I am on the inside and it's weird for me. Do you know what I have on my most wanted list? Besides the Sims 2 for Gamecube, I also want a treadmill for home, pilates resistance bands, and a book that helps me cook with what veggies are in season. Who is this person I have become and when did I lose who I used to be? I'm really confused, actually.

On the plus side, it's always nice when people comment on your weight in a good way. I went to buy some ceramic figures from a lady at my work who casts them and she asked me if I had been losing. She had actually noticed last week but didn't want to say anything because I might just have bought a more flattering shirt or something. And then we talked about simple ways she can change her own weight issues after the new year. I guess that's her resolution or something. She is going to try to cut out snacking at her desk and walk in the fitness center on her breaks. While I encouraged her and wish her all the luck in the world, it's kind of sad when you talk to people like that because the majority of them are not going to change. I've had the same resolutions year after year and never got around to finishing them. Or starting them. This is the first weight loss thing I've done for longer than a day and it's working and that is great. But still, it's kind of sad that other people can't quite get it right. It's almost like I feel guilty for losing because they aren't? Does that make sense?

ANYHOO... I should probably get back to work. I already wasted a ton of time today at various meetings and while my work is done, there is always more to do if I look for it.

AHHHHH, sleeping in is soooooo nice!!  Went to bed at 10 pm and got up at 8:30am.  David thought that I had to go to work today and woke me up at 6:30!!  I rolled over and went back to sleep.

Am heading down to Chico to do some Christmas shopping.  I convinced David to stay home..get more done when he isnt with me.  Love the company but cant really shop for him when he is with me.

I have been been on and off the wagon.  I need to have the iron will that I had when I first started here.  Can someone give me that for christmas?  After christmas I want to start with a clean slate with no guilt.  Do I have any takers?

must run.  have a God day.  love, karen

Dear Sandy hasn't gone to the bathroom yet, but has been outside twice. The first time my husband took her out bad choice.  The second time I took her out.  She was much better with me and walked a little in the back yard.   DH had her go down on her own.  Pissed me off!!!!! He's a man why can't he pick her up or for that fact use his common sense and say, awe she is having a hard time, maybe I ought to carry her ` me  I;ll have DH do it next time with her, carry her that is.

Sandy was waiting for me to come downstairs today and I did and took her out right away.  She has knawed at her bandage and it is unraveling a bit. Tomorrow is the bandage change. We'll see what he says about her not going to the bathroom.

No weigh-in, I already ate and now I am thinking I might go to the gym. We'll see though, I feel under the weather again, maybe never got better.

Take care and God Bless one and All Merry Christmas!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l5Hxw_Jf2B4

kind of seriously annoyed right now. D has been sick, so he's been sleeping in the last few days to catch up and feel better. Yesterday he called in sick,  which I thought was a good idea. Anyway, that doesn't annoy me. What annoys me is that I have a cold too, and some rest would be appreciated but whatever. Every night, there he goes playing his stupid x box war games until eleven or midnight or even one am. Now if you are really so sick you need to sleep in, why aren't you going to bed early? So last night he comes to bed at eleven, after a bit of grouching cause he wants to game more. I try to wake him up at 8:30 and he gets grumpy with me. I say, hey I have a ton to do today and I really really want to work out and he says...well if you have so much to do you really should prioritize, is working out that important.

So I am really annoyed by this and say, "You're right, I guess it is much more important to cook everyone else's meals, do everyone elses laundry, and clean up everyone elses messes around the house than do something for myself."

Ok so it doesn't sound as rude when i type it, but it was said in an annoyed tone of voice. And I am usually not confrontational like that.

The best part is that even after that, he just went back to sleep.

Edit:

I woke him up and we worked it out....and then I worked out...i ran/walked 3.5 miles in about 50min....so tired now, but it felt really good. I am eating some chicken (broiled) and corn...cause it sounded good and was fast...but I am still hungry, not surprisingly. I must must must do laundry and vaccuum my house today...it is a wreck in here....and wrap christmas presents...oh man I have so many to wrap!

1408/234.1

Art of the Season ~ Winter in Norway Video ~ Click and scroll down to watch

Winter in Norway ~ Video by Jeff Waters, music by Apocalyptica - Nothing Else Matters

Tuesday was rather productive if I say so myself.  I actually got to the grocery store and the produce market without getting too tired.  At the produce market I treated myself to some beautful strawberries, smallish, dark red, and aromatic.  They were expensive, as were the blueberries, but everything else was so cheap I spent only $22.  I got romaine lettuce, green peppers, green onions, snow peas, real fresh beansprouts, a big ginger root, apples, oranges, bananas and a mango.  I'm all set in the fresh department for at least a week or more. 

I made the best stir fry - tossed green peppers and onion into a screaming hot pan and then turned down the heat and added minced garlic and fresh ginger.  At the last minute I threw in cooked chicken, snow peas and bean sprouts, just tossing them until hot but still crunchy.  Seasoned with just one tablespoon of low sodium soy sauce, it was perfect.  The ginger and garlic gave a little heat and lots of flavor.  There's nothing like fresh!  It was so filling that I skipped the quinoa I planned to have with it. 

Plan for today:  Lots to do!  Lesley will be here to do her usual.  I'll be at a coffee for a couple of hours, then a hearing test and the visiting nurse. 

Menu for today:  breakfast - cereal, blueberries, milk.  Lunch - a crunchy salad with strips of chicken and the last of that chili from the freezer, made into a soup.  Supper - Sweet & sour pork stir fry with mango instead of pineapple.  Snacks - orange, strawberries, 1 pastry at the coffee.

We're looking forward to a few bright, sunny days this week.  It will be cold and snow is expected by Saturday, but that could change.  I'm glad I don't have to go out today and I bet I can turn off the heat and let the sun warm the place.  Bubba is going to love it.  He's not thrilled about the Christmas decorations in the living room window, but he still has the big, wide windowsill in the bedroom. 

Today:  Be a sun worshiper now because the days are short. 

I mean this is it!!  A life that just sucks.  But the problem is I have not the first clue as to what would make me happy.  Don't really thnk I even know what happy is.  An illusion at best I think. 

But, like Gene says, some things ya just can't fix.  He suggested entering a program that Indiana Wesleyan University.  But they are gonna try to tell me all my problems wiill be solved by handing them to Jesus.  What a bunch of crap. 

I'm simply a depressed, sad, ugly troll.  And I just have to deal with that simple truth.  Of no real use to anyone.  I live in an ocean of saddness, and I am slowly drowning.