mini_mary's Journal

Press on weary pilgrim...
Jul 10 2008 19:57

Today has beena tough day. I have been hungry all day long.  I still have 500 calories to eat though so I am ok.  I just want to eat and eat.  I cleaned out my much needed to be cleaned basement. It was disgusting.  So here I am and still want to workout today.  I recently purchased two new workout videos.  The Biggest Loser (Cardio) and Leslie Sansone's (four mile).  I set up a place in my basement just for me to work out.  I have one hold up though.  I can't seem to figure out how to hook up an old television to a new dvd player. 

Well I will sign off for now, best of luck to all who read.

Mary Beth

Weigh Day...
Jul 08 2008 21:23

Well today was weigh day for me and even though for the past two days I did not post my food or activity I have lost.  I am down to 200 pounds I was hoping to be under the 200 mark but I am not there yet.  I will try harder this next week.  I m so excited I have lost 4 pounds.  Yet at the same time I am disappointed.  I am happy, but when I look in the mirror I become disheartened somewhat.  Also, today I was at a meeting and had to sit on a metal folding chair.  When I sat down it sounded like it was going to break and then when I shifted my weight it made an awfully loud sound.  Everyone stopped and looked at me.  I was mortified, it just silitifys the fact that I am way way over weight.  I must work harder- thats all there is too it.  Feeling sorry for myself or wishing to be different won't hlp me lose weight.  Thanks to all my buddies and best of luck to ya all.

Mary Beth

What a rush!
Jul 06 2008 22:54

Today has been great! From the morning till now I have been non stop.  My husband boys and I went to church this morning.  It was a great service.  Then, we went to visit Chris' brother.  I love going there and they love the kids.  On top of this as we were on the way home my husband got a fire call. Someone had set two bails of hay on fire.  People are sooo disrespectful and heartless.  The value of the hay lost was about $100.00.  To some that may not sound like much but that would really bother me.  I just know that in todays times especially around here that hay is valuable and extremely pricey.  I just don't understand why people do things like this to good people.  It is hard enough to have nice things and when people act like this it litterally makes me sick.

I finally understood tonight for a brief moment why my husband loves his job and why he fights fires.  It is a rush to be around sirens and smoke, etc.  I just wanted to be right in the middle of it too.  I got excited just talking to the owner of the field.  It wasn't much of a fire compared to a building fire or something. But it was still very exciting and I thought I was going to lose it.

Today I did something I regret.  We were up at my brother-in-laws and he went out and bought us Long John Silvers.  I was so hungry and I ate my whole plate.  I went over my calorie intake about 300 calorie worth of food.  I am just thankful that tomorrow is another day before I have to weigh in.  It was so strange though because almost immediately afterwards I felt so sick.  It was like my body was rejecting the food.  I thought I was going to vomit.  I didn't but I still feel bad.  I took some rolaids and drank a whole quart of water and I still feel gross.  I feel greasy and nasty all over.  I plan on taking a long shower and hitting the hay... lol going to bed.  Hopefully my husband will go to bed too and not have to fight fires all night.

<Mary Beth

day at home
Jul 06 2008 00:44

Today has been nice.  I have stayed home all day.  Typically I am out running here and there.  I did a 30 minute pilates (after pregnancy) tape that I got from the public library (can't beat a free rental lol).  I have been in a better mood today than I was yesterday.  My husband and I are getting along fine now.  We weren't really upset with eachother.  I was just a little hurt.  I just feel misunderstood at times.  I hope to work on my bio sometime soon.  It just seems like I have a lot of other more important things that are on my plate right now and I haven't taken the time to add more.  I have a lot I plan on posting on there, but I will need to do it someother time.  Especially since it is almost 1am right now.  Well I will writer tomorrow. Boo ya!

Thank goodness today is almost over...
Jul 03 2008 23:04

Today has been a difficult day for me.  I'm not sure if it is close to my cycle or what is going on.  I am just sooo tired.  I have been sooo hungry too.  I didn't work out  fist thing like i normally do, but I worked out after my boys went to bed around 8.  I feel better now that I worked out.  I almost slacked off for today.  I am so glad I didn't.  I started drinking green tea today.  I am not sure how much I should drink a day, but I want to at least drink a cup.  Also, I want to drink other types of teas...red and white.  I like sipping on the hot tea throughout the day.  It helps me relax.  I started a video journal of my weight tonight also.  It was depressing to see my disgusting body on film.  I guess I have to start somewhere, but it just brought out a lot of negative feelings.  When I saw myself I thought "Wow... I feel so sorry for my husband.  This is not the woman he married."  It is so sad to feel so badly about yourself.  Also, I had a rough start this morning.  My 3 month old had his last feeding a midnight and woke at 430am for another feeding.  I got up and took care of him.  Then, normally I go ahead and get up and workout, but today I was just worn out and went back to sleep.  I woke up at 7am and then it was too late to workout because I still had both boys to get ready and be somewhere by 9am.  My husband asked me if I worked out I said no. Then I rattled off a negative comment about myself and he told me he didn't want to hear it.  It is just hard because i don't know how to express myself.  I don't see myself in a positive light so how can I feel good about my body image?  My husband upset me too.  He appologized later, but I was still hot about it.  Oh, well today is almot over and I am glad that it is.

Back to a good start!
Jul 02 2008 08:36

Today I started back to my workout.  I had not worked out for a total of nine days.  I had injured my ankle.  I guess it was due to all the stress I have been putting on it because of my weight.  Anyway, I walked/jogged for 30+ min. today and I feel like a new person.  Exercising really makes you feel great.  I called and wished my dad Happy Birthday today.  He encouraged me to keep up the work.  I want to make him proud to have a fit daughter.  Just another personal aim of mine to hopefully keep me on track.

Losing it!
Jul 01 2008 21:21

Today I weighed.  I have lost three pounds! It is so exciting to see the scale go down just a little.  I hope that I can keep this up.  I was hoping to start talking to someone on here about losing weight.  Some one who I can get encouragement and someone I can encourage in return.  Feel free to contact me or reply to my entries/

day two of weight loss program
Jun 25 2008 08:03

June 25, 2008.  I got up early and worked out from 0600-0645.  I did some walk/jog exercises along with stetching.  I am feeling really good about my new life style change.  I am going to get my two infants up and my mother and boys are going out of town to Elizabeth town today.  I was wondering if there is anyone on here that knows much about microbiotics?  My step mother swears by it and I was wondering if there was anyone on here that eats that way.