misscharliejo's Journal

back on track
Nov 04 2009 16:15

Time to take action and undo the results of my behaviour over the last few months, infact, my lifetime.  I'm back to where I was at the start of the year. 132.5 kilo. In April I managed to see 117.5 on the scales. Somewhere along the line I crept back up to 130 kilo, and eleven weeks ago I was back down to 121 kilo. Now here I am at 132 .5 again. For the last time.

I went to the gym today, not having been for 11 weeks, due to wanting to get stuff done around the house, not having much energy, and cos of the burn on my foot preventing me from wearing enclosed shoes. I am so unfit. Did a 20 minute walk on Monday, 20 minutes walk in the bush today, and 15 minutes on the exercise bike. It was about all I could manage.

I'm weary, no energy, so am here to change that and get my life back, the life I used to have when i was mountain bike riding, sailing, bush walking, climbing waterfalls and mountains. I am here, not bursting with enthusiasm or motivation, but knowing that I am at rock bottom and have to drag myself up. I can see signs of what the excess weight is doing to me..fluid, cracked heels, breathlesness, wound on my ankle not healing quickly, looking bloated and unhealthy..and that's without knowing what the internal damage is.

Gonna leave it here for now, could write much more, but am tired.