newveggie's Journal

Sorry I havent posted this weekend.  We are doing carpet in our basement and painting.  Thats what I did this weekend, paint and move furniture.  It was fun but a lot of work!
Unfortunately I have been in a slump on eating right and exercising.  I haven't entered my weight in my weight log because the other day I was at my lowest weight since maybe 8th grade... and then I gained 2 pounds back just like that.  I cant bear to see my weight jump like that.
Of course I know why it did.  Think..um friday, chinese buffet.  Saturday, eat snack food all day and a big dinner.  Sunday, Pancakes and syrup for breakfast, scones and honey butter for a snack, nachoes for dinner.  And I didnt practice portion control at all.  I stuffed myself silly. 
So yeah I gained two pounds.  I forgot to mention, I ate all that food and didnt exercise at all.  I didnt sit all day, I painted and cleaned, but I still didnt get my areobic exercise in like I wanted. 
What am I going to do with my self?  I dont know.  I need to get everything at home done, like clean and deep clean and get everything organized.  I want my life in order cause everytime I try to go to the gym I think, I am using time that I could be using to do all these other things that DESPERATELY need done.
I really need some motivation and also some accountability.  My husband tries but I have to cook high cal meals for him, low cal meals for me, do the dishes - after two meals and his mom and my sister and go to work.  I know it doesnt seem like much, and its not... but its so overwhelming that I dont want to do it.  I always have to cook.  ALWAYS.  Nobody else will, nobody else does.  And then I end up doing the dishes too.
I really want an elliptical at home.  I would use it, plus it would be perfect for those times where I only have 10 minutes, not 40 minutes that it takes to go to the gym, get ready go home from gym and exercise there for 15 min.  All of that takes so much time.  10 minutes to get there, 10 minutes back, if I want a good workout, say 45 min... I need atleast an hour and 15 minutes free time, and thats just driving and exercising and getting dressed.  Doesnt include shower or anything like that.
I know losing weight isnt easy, I mean I've lost weight before.  But I hate hate hate hate hate gaining it back.  It is the most depressing.  And I've still got 15 pounds to lose.

What should I do?

PS Goals for the week.  And I'm only doing weekly goals this week but I will post everyday.

1.) Eat 10,500 cals this week (this is supposed to be an average of 1500 a day for 7 days)
2.) Exercise off 2000 calories this week.
3.) Lose 1.5 lbs or have my weight = 128.5 by next monday.

Okay I can do this.  I WILL do this.