nicolearcher's Journal

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The First Day
Feb 22 2007 17:10

Okay, so this is my first day counting my calories. It's a little more depressing than I thought it would be! I never knew I ate so many of them! Actually, it's not that I eat a lot...I guess it's just want I eat.

Just the other day I was really depressed. I think I got a glimpse of my naked body and started crying :) I've just started to accept the fact that I'm always going to be chunky and there's nothing I will ever do to change that. Today, I'm feeling more positive. After looking through this website I have a better idea of what I need to do. I would like to lose about 60 lbs. That's no too bad, right? If I look at the smaller picture I might not get so discouraged...okay, I want to look 1.5 lbs a week.

I can remember worrying about my weight at a very young age. The fact that I've always been a little overweight is what really scares me the most. If I haven't lost much weight since I was 10...why should I believe I can actually make myself lose weight now? What has changed within me to actually have the motivation to do it this time? Why do I think it's "going to be different this time. I'm really going to lose the weight"? Well, I guess this is another test. Let's see if I can pass it this time :)

Nicole

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