njakamarilyn's Journal
I just want to cry and hide Nov 10 2009 11:03
After this morning's weigh-in of being up to 485.0 I just wanted to crawl into bed and pull the covers over my head. I am so tired. I am not getting anywhere and my feet are real swollen again. I am so ashamed - on a roller coaster ride or merry-go-round and I can't stop.
Andy came in just about a half hour ago and said "very carefully" (of course my emotions are running very high!) do you want to walk? DO I WANT TO WALK???? NO!!!! ... but I put on my walking clothes and tennis shoes. We only did 10 houses today ... the weather was lovely but since I have not had any movement since last Wednesday with walking I did not want to push it with PT coming tomorrow. What I want to do is run ... leap ... dance ... but my body is just not allowing me to do so. I also stood at the sink and did the breakfast dishes. Any movement is better than none! Trying to drink a lot of water today as well
{Hugs} I'm sorry you're struggling. Think positive - you did get up and about.
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Honey I know its hard.. your legs are swollen so I would say 95% of that weight gain is fluid. This is going to happen as you get more active.. I know that my hubby is close in weight to you and that his legs swell horribly there is a HUGE amount of fluid there. Some things that trigger his swelling and I mean right away and a heavy swelling is soda. If he drinks coke or pepsi I can count on his legs swelling up so that I can't even get his socks on. He is on a large dose of diuretics and it still happens. Check your logs if you keep track and see what you were eating and drinking prior to your swellings and see if there is any food/drink correlation.. you might be suprised by what you find! You have been doing so well and I am know that you will do as you have done today and walk even though it was the last thing you wanted to do.. Every day makes a difference and the more you do the easier it will become AND the less frequent you will have the swelling on your legs. I am so proud of you NJ for staying with it. It is very hard to keep going sometimes when you feel unmotivated when the scale says gains like this.. the only thing you can do is to keep on keeping on. I can honestly tell you from the bottom of my heart.. if you keep on keeping on those numbers will come down.. its science. Keep strong mon cheri!!!! |
